Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Tuesday, March 25, 2003

    Posted 7:35 PM by Gene

    This is absolutely the LAST I say about the Oscars® (I mean it -- honest!), but everything here makes sense: people want to see Michael Moore make an ass of himself -- AND THEY DON'T WANT TO SEE THE ADS.

    Meanwhile, an earthquake strikes every subordinate at Washington Mutual, JCPenney, P&G, AmEx, McDonald's, etc., etc., as every one of their CEOs screams, "I HAD THE GREATEST TIME AT THE OSCARS® AND YOU DIDN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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