Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Monday, February 09, 2004

    Posted 1:08 PM by Gene

    Some of my two or three readers a day may remember the old jingle for Lava soap: "L! A! V! A! L! A! V! A!" Now imagine, if you will, if hard-core knee-jerk conservatives ran the news biz:

    Such Tinseltown "experts" as Sean Penn, Janeane Garofalo, Danny Glover, Mike Farrell, Richard Dreyfuss, Denzel Washington and Anjelica Huston, some of whom have actually graduated from high school, want murderer Kevin Cooper to be freed or to continue getting taxpayer-supplied room and board, as he has for the past 19 years. Oh, and Jesse Jackson, Noam Chomsky, Angela Davis and International Socialist Organization also want to spare him.

    It would be "L! A! V! A!" ALL the friggin' TIME.

    P. S. The guy got a stay of execution. HA HA HA!!!!!

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