Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

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    Thursday, March 04, 2004

    Posted 5:02 PM by Gene

    Thirty months after four commandeered airliners shocked the American public by killing thousands, journalists continue dying in an open-ended, ill-defined “war”....

    I! I! I! ME!! ME!! ME!! WE!!! WE!!! WE!!! The whole universe revolves around YOU NEWS HACKS. It would never do to suggest maybe 9/11 was about more than "JOURNALISTS" dying. But you're our modern-day Ptolemys, and you can't see the stars from your fog-bound cloud-covered EARTH.

    Such hackery. "Airliners shocked." They had minds of their own? "The American public." The not so subtle implication of this bad breath is that either the rest of the world had reason not to care, or we had it coming. What HEAD LICE. I want to know what papers the idiots who wrote this work for.

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