Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Friday, October 15, 2004

    Posted 7:30 PM by Gene

    Let's see, P&G (which we hereby rename Poop & Gall) ditches a hair-shampoo campaign involving orgasms for one that involves a totally useless product placement and equally useless downloads from iTunes.

    As the company's chairman -- a man named Lafley, A. G. LAFLEY, who probably doesn't know what P&G does without the help of spreadsheets -- would say if he had any brains, "WHY THE HELL DO WE ADVERTISE?!?!?"

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