Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Monday, October 18, 2004

    Posted 6:38 AM by Gene

    Two weeks ago appeared this classic hed in the NEW YORK POST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:

    JON STEWART, PARIS HILTON ARE HOT AT FRANKFURT BOOK FAIR

    Surprisingly there was no grumbling from the headquarters of See It N -- er, THE DAILY SHOW. This should have gotten THE EDWARD R. MURROW OF COMEDY exercised; the country is in mortal danger, and he is here to save it!!!!! Sidling him up to the AIRHEAD OF AIRHEADS? HHMPH!! One wonders if JONNO is auditioning for DANNO's job (remember BLATHERGATE?); certainly he's saying the right things. One might agree success is going to the new St. Murrow's head except one must ask of a man who wrote a "book" with nineteen other people if there's a head for it to go to.

    No, Edward the Second is merely this generation's version of Robert Benchley. Remember him?

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