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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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Tuesday, November 30, 2004
Posted
6:31 AM
by Gene
I'D LIKE TO SUBJECT THE WHOLE G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLEBLOGGER STAFF TO A LIE DETECTOR TEST. THE ONLY THING THEY'D TELL THE TRUTH ABOUT IS THAT THEY'RE WORTH A LOT OF INFLATED MONEY.
[W]e will be pushing new code to both gather information on these freezes as well as revise some features to put less strain on the database.
THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE MEANING TO THIS: THEY DON'T KNOW WHEN THEY'RE BREAKING DOWN, AND TO "FIX" THE PROBLEM THEY'LL SACRIFICE FUNCTIONALITY. BUT WHO NEEDS A FIX WHEN YOU'RE HEADED TO $5,000 A SHARE?
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