THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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You must know, hack, I mean Jack -- and judging from your column I'd say you don't -- that the People's Choice Awards were chosen this year using SELF-SELECTED INTERNET POLLS, and we all know how reliable THOSE are. And that you should feel SLIGHTED is truly LAUGHABLE, because in feeling SLIGHTED you evidence a GREAT DEAL OF SELF-IMPORTANCE, SELF-IMPORTANCE that is not WORTHY of a LOUSY AWARDS SHOW -- YOURS OR THEIRS -- and while your feeling SLIGHTED may not move the EGO METER like MIKE it still makes it wobble A LITTLE.