Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Friday, March 18, 2005

    Posted 6:29 AM by Gene



    KADIDDLEBLOG'S BETTER THAN EVER! I've found several more excuses for its sudden spurt of TECHNOLOGICAL EXCELLENCE. One says it's ELECTRICITY. Another who may or may not work for KADIDDLEBLOG says just keep closing and opening your browser. This suggestion is like saying if you can't open a locked door with a key try ramming it shoulder-first 100 times. Unless you're a linebacker the most likely outcome is a dislocated shoulder or a trip to the looney bin.

    I have all but given up on these clowns. G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE clearly views KADIDDLEBLOG as an error of its youthful days, a loss leader with virtually no hope of redemption, so it's running it down, encouraging bloggers through its malign neglect to head elsewhere. And they will.

    (My humble apologies to the late, great Red Skelton, but Clem Kadiddlehopper is such an OBVIOUS MASCOT for G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE's NON-FUNCTIONING BLOG DISSERVICE.)

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