THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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Again, the story behind the story is far more interesting, but news hacks being news hacks we'll never learn it, for it centers on their ability to take a bribe without any money passing. Still, we are heartened (ahem!) that's it's again possible to speak of LEGENDARY WELCH without shame, and we can only assume Danny Boy has bigger and better things on his mind, much like his comrade in withered arms JOHN BYRNE JR.
TRANSLATION: This is straight out of the wrong end of the BLUNDER'S alimentary canal.