Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Monday, August 29, 2005

    Posted 9:13 AM by Gene

    CNN PANICS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    REPORT: ROOF OF SUPERDOME IN NEW ORLEANS, WHERE THOUSANDS EVACUATED AHEAD OF HURRICANE KATRINA, IS LEAKING RAIN!!!!! DETAILS SOON!!!!!!!!!!

    My guess is the only practical outcome of this news is that the Saints will be asking half-a-trillion bucks for a new stadium.

    "NEW ORLEANS MAY NEVER BE THE SAME!!!!!!!!!!" warned National Hurricane Center Director Max Mayfield.

    Spare us the melo, Max. Nawlans hasn't been the same since SATCH left.

    And who, or WHAT, is EQECAT?

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