Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Saturday, August 27, 2005

    Posted 4:07 PM by Gene

    To CURLEY'S (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) STOOGES, the comedians who just put out a FAQ on Iraq, I must ask -- what was the point of THIS comedy? It's a double-joke -- a plug for NASCAR and a plug for our favorite moviemaker. How much time and salary and expense accounts are wasted excreting these worthless press releases? What is the point of a wire service when it does JUNK like this?

    Reading this totally useless conglomeration of vowels and consonants I think, a FAQ isn't ENOUGH for YOU folks.

    And another disadvantage of the Web for CURLEY'S (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) STOOGES is that their by-lines DON'T REMAIN ANONYMOUS. A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD TO JENNA FRYER.

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