Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Thursday, August 04, 2005

    Posted 1:12 PM by Gene

    While standing waiting impatiently for an order in a local pizzeria -- let me tell you, few things are more pleasant than waiting impatiently in an un-air-conditioned pizzeria on a 95-degree day! -- I was bombarded by at least five minutes of commercials (one from Circuit City -- see, we do remember the ads) and a Beatles tune that sounded suspiciously speeded up. No, it wasn't the CHEAP, close enough, it was a

    VIACON!!!!!!!!!!

    ZONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN may be gone but his tricks live on.

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