THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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An inflatable porn figure says a publisher named Smog Breath Press or whatever is touting said figure for writing a book said figure had nothing to do with, which doesn't surprise us as we doubt inflatable porn figures can read; and
Eric Clapton, who lived half his life in a smog of his own, is making $4 million for a book he almost certainly won't write.
I NOMINATE SUMNER FOR THE NOBEL PRIZE IN LI-TE-RAH-TEEYURE! He wouldn't be any worse than the COMMIES.