Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Sunday, October 16, 2005

    Posted 9:27 AM by Gene

    Oh, NO -- an eBay ZILLIONAIRE is behind ALL THESE MOVIE LECTURES!

    Is this to make up for all that SLEAZY DEALING on YOUR CREATION?

    It's a shame we can't awaken Kaufman and Hart, or maybe Scott Fitzgerald from the dead -- this guy is RIPE for abuse.

    I think I've come up with a joke: If you want to send a message, call eBay. (Don't forget the fees and shipping.)

    Skoll rhymes with...stole?

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