Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Sunday, November 13, 2005

    Posted 12:50 PM by Gene

    Another down weekend for the BEEEEEEEEEEEE-OOOOOOOOOOOO -- down about 15 percent. Is it me or have we had seven or eight consecutive slump weeks? We can trust the HACKS not to report that. One slump is enough.

    P. S. at 6:40 P..M. But what's this? It's PAUL DRECK yelling, "HEEEEEEEEEEERE I COME TO SAVE THE DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!"

    The way YOU could save OUR day is by DUCT-TAPING YOUR MOUTH.

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