Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Wednesday, November 23, 2005

    Posted 7:26 PM by Gene

    THIS is why THE LORD invented SUPERDUPERMEGAGIGABLOGGERS:

    Holy Harry!
    Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire grosses a record (for its franchise) 101.4 million dollars for its opening weekend. That's the fourth best three-day opening ever.

    WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We couldn't have learned THAT without a SUPERDUPERMEGAGIGABLOGGER! Such FACTUAL ANALYSIS! Such BRILLIANT WRITING! Such PROFITS from our IPO! WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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