Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Sunday, September 10, 2006

    Posted 9:10 AM by Gene

    C'mon, Boy Wonder Jon, here you are starting off your career as ruler of the wor -- as editor of a POWERFUL newsrag, and you give us the HP story? The Plame Case of Business? Come on, Little Jon, get your readers worked up with the perfidy of Republicans -- or have them oohing over the genius of SHOW-BIZ! Didn't Rev. "Hellfire" Peters teach you better? He may have to lecture you at one of those dinners where he mooches off his zillionaire pupils!

    Happily that other Jonny has the right idea -- he writes "SATIRE." And not very good satire at that. Or maybe it's Kafka. Guy goes around the office all day saying Kafka, no doubt. But then who expects anything good from these Ivy Leaguers?

    OR:

    Subscribe to NEWSWEEK, and you could win a dream vacation. (No purchase necessary.)

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