Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Thursday, September 28, 2006

    Posted 5:29 PM by Gene

    RUPERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! has made DAPOST!!!!!!!!!!.com so difficult to navigate through we didn't see this story, which thoroughly warms our hearts: there's a chance THE GREATEST MUSICAL OF ALL TIME may CLOSE ten years before THE PAPER OF RE-CORD said it would. People can blame the casting, but somehow other shows have lasted through second- and even third-stringers. Sorry, I blame the BRILLIANT SHOW.

    Last week it played to a walloping 50.4 PERCENT of capacity, and at an average $68.65 a ticket, suggesting those superexpensive orchestra seats aren't flying like latkes anymore. BOYS!!!!!

    P. S. We note lots of good seats are available for MONTY PYTHON'S BLAZING SADDLES, which opened to thunderous hordes clapping above their heads just eighteen months ago. MORONS.

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