THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
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Mr. Lafley will keynote the conference with an Oct. 6 presentation, "The P&G Brand Marketing Powerhouse," chronicling the turnaround he's led since taking over in 2000. Among other points, Mr. Lafley is expected to talk about how P&G's massive investment in R&D translates to product innovation. P&G, the No. 1 advertiser, spent $6.8 billion on worldwide advertising and $2.1 billion on R&D in fiscal 2006.
P&G results speak for themselves: P&G reported record sales, profits and earnings per share in its recently ended fiscal year, and the stock yesterday reached an all-time high. P&G's market cap: $201 billion -- up $127 billion on Mr. Lafley's watch.
AND WE INTEND TO WASTE MORE OF OUR CUSTOMERS' HARD-EARNED MONEY THAN EVER!!!!!!!!!!
P. S. Before A. G. "engineered" His company's Jesus-like resurrection P&G was selling for only about $4 a share less than it is now -- so we KNOW He hasn't watched a bit of television since He's taken it over.