THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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This is the kind of ironic-jokey thing news hacks insist on writing, and which helps explain why most news writing reeks; nonetheless I discern an elegiacal spirit to this Baywatch tribute. Popular TV shows always had strong ensemble casts, from I Love Lucy on. But the ensemble is difficult machinery to assemble, and with modern TV the gears lie all over the place. Baywatch could not have clicked in syndication without its uniformly (and sometimes risibly) telegenic cast. No one would call it art, but eye candy does have its place. The problem is entertainment doesn't know how to deliver the simple pleasure anymore; it must give us EINSTEIN -- or filth.