Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

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    Tuesday, January 09, 2007

    Posted 8:09 AM by Gene

    THE ASSPRESS TYPETYPETYPETYPETYPES:

    But it was his creation of Scooby-Doo, the cowardly dog with an adventurous heart, that captivated audiences and endured for generations.

    Puh-LEASE! Any shows starring THE VOICE of CASEY KASEM!!!!! will smell worse than Manhattan yesterday. And of course it was another Bill-Joe recycling job: a brown Astro rounded off. We can see Bill and Joe now: "Iwao! No original ideas!" They probably had contests to see who could draw a Scooby-Doo episode the fastest. The episodes lost. We sound too surly -- clearly Mr. Takamoto was a talented man; he had to be to have worked with Walt. But how would you know with Bill and Joe?

    Forgive us our ire, but we're still chafing over the incalculable loss to mankind of several weeks back, plus the sad news was conveyed by "Warner Bros.", which sounds like just another way of selling the properties.

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