Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Friday, March 23, 2007

    Posted 11:27 AM by Gene

    Somebody finally gets Jo-NAH mad! And who is it? It's -- MR. MELLERDRAMMER!

    Which puts us in mind of The School for Scandal:

    SIR PETER.

    What Sir Oliver do you blame him for not making Enemies?

    SIR OLIVER.

    Yes--if He has merit enough to deserve them.

    We think judging Jo-NAH and MR. MELLERDRAMMER Richard Brinsley would have to revise that.

    (Corrected at 5:00 p. m.; I misattributed a thought to Sheridan)

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