Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Monday, April 16, 2007

    Posted 6:58 PM by Gene



    Brian Williams, Charles Gibson, Katie Couric, John King, Greta Van Susteren, Geraldo Rivera, Shepard Smith, Matt Lauer, Meredith Vieira, Tiki Barber, Harry Smith, Robin Roberts, Chris Cuomo, John Roberts, Kiran Chetry...

    THE YAKKETY-YAK-YAKKING YAK-YAKKERS ARE ALL THERE!

    AND AMERICA'S LEAD -- NEWSRAG OF THE ZEITGEIST YAKKETY-YAK SPECULATES TOO!

    ALREADY UNTOLD THOUSANDS OF YAKKETY-YAK YAKKING NEWS HACKS ARE ON THE SCENE BELCHING BILLIONS OF YAKKETY-YAK-YAKKING WORDS WHILE COPYING EACH OTHER'S NOTES OVER SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED HOURS AGO, TO WHICH BLESSED FEW WERE EYEWITNESSES, AND THAT THEY DON'T OTHERWISE KNOW A YAKKETY-YAK-YAKKING DAMNED THING ABOUT!

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