Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

    Blogroll Me!

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    Sunday, June 03, 2007

    Posted 2:22 PM by Gene

    "IT LOOKS LIKE A LOT OF PEOPLE WANTED TO GET KNOCKED UP THIS WEEKEND! HAHA!" [500-sound-byte-a-day overemphasis and sound effect added]

    Any cretinous news hack who quotes from THE BIG FOUR -- Norm Ornstein, Larry Sabato, Perfesser Thompson and PAUL DRECK-- puts his feet on his desk and his mind in the wastebasket.

    A NEUHARTHISM OF THE MONTH AWARD TO NON GERMAIN!

    P. S. at 4:28 p.m. DAMMIT T. K., you're not supposed to look on the bad side!

    (First link fixed 9/2/2010)

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