Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Saturday, August 11, 2007

    Posted 9:48 AM by Gene

    DEBKA.COM caused a DIRTY-BOMB SCARE in NEW YORK!

    Oh, we can see it now: SAM LITTLE at WORLD SECURITY HEADQUARTERS in his den or wherever, busy juggling twelve phones, typing into six computers, speaking with every known SUPERDUPERMEGAGIGABLOGGER on the planet, screaming, "Yes! YES! A DIRTY BOMB's been CONFIRMED in NEW YORK!!! DEBKA's on the case. I'm in CONSTANT CONTACT with them. Yes yes, ISRAELI INTELLIGENCE CONFIRMS THERE'S A DIRTY BOMB IN NEW YORK!!!!!" And SAM promptly translates all this screaming onto his blog. "DIRTY BOMB IN NEW YORK!!!!!!!!!!" And of COURSE it proves to be false, because it's DEBKA, and SAM issues a non-apology in two-point font, and New York's finest MUST ask themselves, "Why did we pay so much attention to these cranks on the Web?"

    Of course we're only guessing about SAM; we will NEVER AGAIN click on to his site, and especially not today.

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