Eugene David<br>...The One-Minute Pundit

Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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1/25/04 - 2/1/04

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6/1/03 - 6/8/03

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4/27/03 - 5/4/03

4/20/03 - 4/27/03

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3/23/03 - 3/30/03

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3/2/03 - 3/9/03

2/23/03 - 3/2/03

2/16/03 - 2/23/03

2/9/03 - 2/16/03

2/2/03 - 2/9/03

1/26/03 - 2/2/03

1/19/03 - 1/26/03

1/12/03 - 1/19/03

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Posted 5:01 PM by Gene

Robert, the TV ad-blurbist of USAOKAY!!!!!, again assumes a Thinker's pose to question why the hordes are fleeing summer television. "Too many of the same shows!" he says. "Too many shows, period! No HBO! [This is bad news?] No broadcast hits! Many of the things we call cable 'hits' really aren't! Too many regular-season leftovers! Too many shows that should have just been left out!" Yep, things are looking good -- bad -- but right below the link on OKAY!!!!!'s home page is this long awaited bit of scintillation:

'Today' to add fourth hour next month

We'd say TV's in terminal condition but there's nothing a good dose of OUR ill-gotten money from deaf, dumb and blind ADVERTISERS can't cure.

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