Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Posted 1:59 PM by Gene

How can you turn a real hero into another Ann Coulter/Keith O eyeball roller? Simple -- get GREG to do it! When Satch let Ike have it in '57 over his civil rights bumbling, we can be sure Ike deserved it, first because Satch never got mad at anybody, and second because Ike at his frequent worst was a muddle-headed mumble-mouthed incompetent (or, as con-SER-va-tives put it, an "underrated president"). Well! GREG just found out about this -- indeed, we suspect Greg just found out who Satch was; what's more if we had to guess Greg's musical taste we'd say it's the left-wing equivalent of that sap who sings "Ah'm PRAYOUD t'BEEEE a CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYN!" -- or maybe BARRY MANILOW or the STARLAND VOCAL BAND. Anyway, Satch's heroism now becomes suspect because an undoubted total philistine and political hack like GREG has found out about it, and emotes over it. Despite this, in our book, it doesn't hurt Satch one iota -- and it doesn't hurt Greg with us either, as he's already a little below where the DREGS are.

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