THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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Hey c'mon, JonBoy, isn't this, uh, piling on? Don't you realize the TWXSTERS sold Bloomy for prez? And now you're number two -- a DEFINITE number two! You don't have any right endorsing presidential candidates! Even if you CAN get your dozens of interns to help you write 6,979 WORDS!
Besides, He has His own PR department in The Paper of Re-CORD.
Or,
The president's press secretary Jon Meacham said today....
Is being number two THAT bad? Just remember Avis, you'll feel better.
Or, WHO NEEDS NEWSRAGS?