Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Thursday, December 20, 2007

Posted 9:19 AM by Gene

"I'M SURE YOU'RE DELIGHTED TO DISCOVER THAT YOU EFFECTIVELY RUINED WHAT HAD OTHERWISE BEEN A REALLY NICE WEEK IN MY LIFE. GIVEN THE TONE OF YOUR WRITING, YOU'RE JUST THE KIND OF PERSON WHO WOULD TRULY TAKE PLEASURE IN SUCH A THING....IF YOU ARE SO JUVENILE AS TO FOI MY SCHEDULE AS A RESULT OF YOUR NOT GETTING MY STAFF TO CALL ME AWAY FROM MY FAMILY ON MY BIRTHDAY SO YOU CAN GET INFORMATION YOU COULD USE AGAINST ME IN A COLUMN, THEN DO IT!! I FRANKLY DON'T GIVE A RAT'S REAR AS TO YOUR REGARD FOR ME AS A PUBLIC OFFICIAL, BECAUSE YOU APPARENTLY WILL NEVER OVERCOME YOUR BOORISH BEHAVIOR TOWARD THOSE WHOSE OPINIONS YOU CANNOT CHALLENGE ON A RESPONSIBLE OR INTELLECTUAL BASIS!!!!!" [Salt-of-the-earth overemphasis added]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMEN!!!!!

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