Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Tuesday, March 11, 2008

    Posted 11:43 AM by Gene

    Between glorified downloading and higher hi-def the popcorn restaurant is doomed. One excuse THE CONSPIRACY and the ad-blurbists always schlep out is that movie-watching is a "communal" experience. Who wants to see any Best-Picture Os-CAR® nominee of recent vintage in a crowd? Such masterworks are made for the secretive onanism that is the stock-in-trade of ad-blurbists. What few extrusions are suitable for a big audience are mere incitements for a rabble to applaud oafishly over its heads. Ultimately it should be possible to plaster a TV onto a wall, and when the Babbitts come back they'll add dedicated home-theaters to their offerings, and there'll be no need to endure sticky Coke on the floor, or sullen help in the aisles, unless you want your kids to volunteer.

    Besides, do these geniuses think the low-IQ types who run the restaurants can run the equipment? And who can predict where the first pirated copies of first-runs will emanate from?

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