THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
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Branson East extrudes GENIUS:
"It looks like 'Tarzan' when you walk into the theater because it's all green and viney," says a source. "You get scared for a second, but it's a lot better than 'Tarzan.' It's decent. It's going to appeal to kids who like the movie."
Let's hope so; we wouldn't want a company partnered by LUKE SPIELBERG to engage in GLOBAL WARMING.
"There's this kid in a cute Shrek costume running around for a few minutes," one person says.
American Idol?
One of the fairy-tale characters proudly announces that he's "sold my memoirs to Stephen Schwartz" - the composer of "Wicked."
"They didn't get the joke in Seattle, but maybe they'll get it in New York," a source says, adding that, with all its inside musical-theater jokes, "Shrek" strays into territory well-mined by "Spamalot."
Who says it's a joke?
One source says the production could have been designed by Kenneth Feld, the peddler of such middlebrow fare as Disney on Ice.
Strap a pair of skates on d'Arcy James, one source says, and "you'd have 'Shrek on Ice.' "
LUKE!!!!! JEFF!!!!!!!!!!
DreamWorks seems to be playing it safe with its most valuable property. The company is so bent on making "Shrek" audience-friendly, it's encouraging theatergoers to e-mail comments to help the creators fine-tune the show.
At least nobody's writing "Close it out of town."
Democracy!