THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
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P. S. The last weekend the biz went below $50 million was in 2001 -- and that was nearly two weekends after 9/11. The lowest weekend before now, adjusted for inflation, appears to have been in 1996, when (it says here) tickets cost $4.42, compared to $7.08 today. It is altogether possible this is the worst weekend since 1991 -- and it would still be worse because our population's increased by twenty percent.
Sorry to make a big thing of these dubious stats, but to rewrite what we always say, what's BAD for PEOPLE WARNER is GOOD for America!