Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Friday, November 07, 2008

    Posted 6:55 PM by Gene

    Further from PEOPLE WARNER'S FLAGSHIP, it would not be fair to summon THE MASTER's line (as we have before) that "there is no settling the point of precedency between a louse and a flea", but these two former Mouseketeers' armies of press agents somehow remind us of it, and the ever-declining legion of news hacks seems as intent on subjecting us to them -- especially the one, for whom it has a new thing -- as it is on turning a mere president into God.

    P. S. The TWXSTERS save money by copying from the Daily Mail. Smashing!

    Also $10.10 a share, or $80 from where it used to be (unadjusted for inflation).

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