Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Monday, January 05, 2009

    Posted 5:54 PM by Gene

    Health official Raed Arini said he has stopped filling out the space on death certificates left for "reason for death."

    "THE REASON FOR DEATH IS THE ISRAELI ARMY!!!!!!!!!!" Arini said, as medics rushed in with more wounded people.     [On-the-side-of-the-angels overemphasis added]

    If we had to guess ASSPress and its partners in JERNALISM have been running nothing but "humanitarian" stories lately.

    P. S.

    McClatchy Company (NYSE: MNI) 45% HIGHER; [DAMMIT!] continuing higher today but not hearing any news that would justify today's rally on strong volume. Shares of McClatchy rose more than 36% on Friday. [DOUBLE-DAMMIT!] With about 22.5% of its float shorted during December, today's move could be the result of short sellers covering their downside bets.

    PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!!!!!

    Consolation: GCI's still under ten, and that new ad platform didn't budge PAPEROFRECORDCO.

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