THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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Speaking of HARVEY WHINER's Os-CAR® winner (whom this Kaplan, Inc. keyboard tickler must refer to as an ac-TOR) we paraphrase Mark Twain's old line: We'd rather go to bed with Audrey Hepburn in full regalia than Kate W. stark naked.
P. S. DAMMIT! Kaplan's still well off its lows. But ST. WARREN hit a new one (though it recovered, double-dammit).
P. P. S. We had to alter that Twain paraphrase because the quote seems to take several forms -- and we can't even be sure he said it because no one can point to a specific source. Just because it sounds like him doesn't mean it is him.