Posted 1:57 PM by Gene

We wonder when our friend Bunsen Honeydew will come to the rescue. We can't just go on using words like senseless. There are reasons for these things. There's a reason for the sudden proliferation of psychopaths. These things don't sprout mysteriously like wild mushrooms -- and even wild mushrooms have a reason. This is where Bunsen comes in: if we do find out he'll do something to turn us into zombies.

We wonder also when our state media, which have inflicted us with so much senseless make-believe violence, finally acquire the gall to campaign for gun control. To paraphrase the NRA, guns don't kill people, psychos do. And something makes them psychos. Sorry, we think you're in the mix.