Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Saturday, January 09, 2010

    Posted 2:44 PM by Gene

    We are sorry to hear Art Clokey, Gumby's father, has died. Gumby's one of those things I never paid much mind to in my youth, or if I did was it in derision -- look at the silly stop animation! and those silly looking toy fire engines! Hear that silly stock music! -- but somehow the BOOMERS did to this what they did to STAR TREK and JEOPARDY!!!!! and made it an ICON!!!!! (favorite news-hack word for when he's not thinking). That fact alone means we can't go back to the simple virtue that made Gumby just time-wasting filler for the afternoon kiddie-show hosts. Thomas Wolfe was right.

    (Via another WOLFE WOLFF with no literary talent except for toadying) (Corrected 1/19/2010)

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