Eugene David<br>...The One-Minute Pundit

Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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2/9/03 - 2/16/03

2/2/03 - 2/9/03

1/26/03 - 2/2/03

1/19/03 - 1/26/03

1/12/03 - 1/19/03

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Monday, February 08, 2010

Posted 3:00 PM by Gene

Rep. John Murtha, one of Congress's leading disbursers of pork, unindicted ABSCAM co-conspirator, and a man nonpareil in saluting his own immortality through public works like his heavily-traveled airport, has died. RIP.

Needless to say the ASSPRESS salutes the man whose real name was once "RESPECTED X. MARINE" for his PRINCIPLED, NOBLE, HONORABLE OPPOSITION to an UNJUST WAR -- so long as we don't have to mention THAT AIRPORT.

And PETE is even more helpful: nine grafs on Respected's courage and wit, and we save the minor parts for the end. A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD (POLITICAL FLUNKY DIVISION) TO PETE!

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