Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Sunday, August 08, 2010

    Posted 5:33 PM by Gene

    You may recall how the pompous educrats of KAPLAN, INC. refused NEWSMAX!!!!!'s bid for SIDSWEEK because it was...conservative. Well we were just in our local Barnes and Noble and did something very few people have done -- we skimmed through NEWSMAX!!!!! Magazine. One article caught our eye: "Sixty is Sexy!" was inspired by YOU-KNOW-WHO and struck us as a cross between the worst of Reader's Digest and the worst of Useless News. KAPLAN, INC. had good reasons for turning down NEWSMAX!!!!!. Why did they have to be the wrong ones?

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