Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Tuesday, April 05, 2011

    Posted 10:54 AM by Gene

    A GRIEVOUS LOSS FOR THE WORLD: That blithering pseudo-intellectual with the Dilbert voice, the HANS VON KALTENBORN of our day, Jeff "Super-High-IQ" Greenfield, has been...shown the door at SUMNERNET. But CABLE NUISANCE NETWORK needs talking gasbags to fill in its 50,000 hours of "news", so this is not the last we'll have to hear of him.

    His "could-it-be-that-or-is-it-possible-that" routine from his days with LORD KOPPEL still rings in our ears.

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