Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Wednesday, October 14, 2009

    Posted 4:57 PM by Gene

    Bruce Wasserstein, one of the Wall Street Casino's leading dealers, has died.



    Somebody just celebrated.

    It's possible this is an electronic glitch. It's possible it isn't.

    What an apt commentary for today.

    P. S. at 7:40 p. m. It was a glitch; the stock is trading down after hours. Nonetheless G000,000,000,000GLE has "$91.57" as a 52-week high, and SLIME's site now boasts this absurd chart:



    Yes, how thoroughly typical.

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