THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
Blogroll Me!
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Thursday, October 07, 2004
Sen. Miller Recasts 'Wizard of Oz': Kerry as the Scarecrow ...
and perhaps KARL ROVE as the GREAT and POWERFUL OZ...
and JOHN EDWARDS as DOROTHY.
(Sorry as always for the NewsMAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
and perhaps KARL ROVE as the GREAT and POWERFUL OZ...
and JOHN EDWARDS as DOROTHY.
(Sorry as always for the NewsMAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
The Democrats' MARTYR of the DAY:
A Harris County Precinct 7 deputy constable was fired Wednesday after being accused of having a campaign sign in her county car.
Catherine Moore denied campaigning on county time, but a sign for Democratic candidate May Walker was found in the trunk of her county-owned vehicle, said Constable Michael C. Butler.
That tune goes well with the LET-'EM-RIP gang attacking America's Bush/Cheney signs.
A Harris County Precinct 7 deputy constable was fired Wednesday after being accused of having a campaign sign in her county car.
Catherine Moore denied campaigning on county time, but a sign for Democratic candidate May Walker was found in the trunk of her county-owned vehicle, said Constable Michael C. Butler.
That tune goes well with the LET-'EM-RIP gang attacking America's Bush/Cheney signs.
And in more EXCELSIOR news of the THEA-TAH, Broadway's getting two venues renamed as the Schoenfeld and the Jacobs.
Sorta rolls trippingly off the tongue like one of your recent musicals, si?
Sorta rolls trippingly off the tongue like one of your recent musicals, si?
Explosion damages Hilton hotel filled with Israelis in Egypt
And all Egypt CHEERS!!!!!
A Hilton too. How much do we pay you guys, oh holy thug HOSNI?
And all Egypt CHEERS!!!!!
A Hilton too. How much do we pay you guys, oh holy thug HOSNI?
One reason the SLOP that is JACK'S (now SAMMY GLICKMAN'S) ALPHABET SOUP is full of BOTULISM is that the recipe can be GAMED to help PUBLICITY STUNTS.
P. S. Expect IDIOT RAVES FROM ANDY S. and the RIGHT-WING GLIBERAL -- because it's A CONSERVATIVE MOVIE.
P. S. Expect IDIOT RAVES FROM ANDY S. and the RIGHT-WING GLIBERAL -- because it's A CONSERVATIVE MOVIE.
CAN YOU REMEMBER the last time a TV news organization told you something you didn't expect them to say?
Do you have five years?
Do you have five years?
The Port Authority of New York and New Jersey pulled the permit on an art exhibit at Kennedy Airport after an opening-night party left a landmark terminal strewn with cigarette butts, broken glass and empty liquor bottles.
Don't they qualify as art?
Port Authority spokesman Pasquale DiFulco said guests at Friday's opening-night party had been illegally smoking inside the terminal, and that liquor had been sold without a permit. He said a door had been broken, walls were covered with graffiti and vomit was found on the floor.
IT IS ART!!!!!
Don't they qualify as art?
Port Authority spokesman Pasquale DiFulco said guests at Friday's opening-night party had been illegally smoking inside the terminal, and that liquor had been sold without a permit. He said a door had been broken, walls were covered with graffiti and vomit was found on the floor.
IT IS ART!!!!!
Lazy show-biz news hacks must ALWAYS fall back on PERFESSER B. S. THOMPSON and PAUL DRECK. Add to that list THE PUBLISHER OF TALKERS, an insider magazine hardly anybody reads. Whenever there's a story on talk radio HE shows up with a predictable sound byte, just like B. S. and PAUL DRECK. The absolute inundation of quotes from the same few sources shows up the HACKS' total lassitude and why reporting based on the same few quotes from the same few sources is NOT CREDIBLE.
(Corrected 2/16/2009; I gave this overexposed self-appointed expert of talk radio the wrong title.)
(Corrected 2/16/2009; I gave this overexposed self-appointed expert of talk radio the wrong title.)
Rodney Dangerfield, 1021-2004 [home-page SIC]
I tell ya he didn't get no respect!
The left has KARL ROVE. The right has -- NOAM CHOMSKY!!!!!
Listen, I can believe Karl's a little scheming, and Noam a little brain-dead, but can't we debate politics on the MERITS?
Listen, I can believe Karl's a little scheming, and Noam a little brain-dead, but can't we debate politics on the MERITS?
Don "I WUV BOONDOCKS" Wycliff says newspapers should run more "raw" news.
Why not? They rub us raw with overcooked news.
Why not? They rub us raw with overcooked news.
Who? wins the Nobel Prize in Li-te-rah-teeyure -- AGAIN.
When does John "The Tinkler" Updike get it?
P. S. I think I know why they gave her the award:
A controversial figure in her homeland, Jelinek belonged to the Austrian Communist Party from 1974-91.
RAH! RAH! RAH! Her and Le Duc Tho!
When does John "The Tinkler" Updike get it?
P. S. I think I know why they gave her the award:
A controversial figure in her homeland, Jelinek belonged to the Austrian Communist Party from 1974-91.
RAH! RAH! RAH! Her and Le Duc Tho!
We all know what "public-service" jernalism is: bashing government and bashing conservatives. If people hate NEWS HACKS now, just think if they pursued THEEE TRUUUTH on "25 percent profits."
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
My friends, they will not catch me. Though I may be on the run, and I may never be able to return home to my beloved Michigan, I make this solemn vow to you and yours: The slackers of America shall not be denied their noodles, they will proudly wear their clean underwear as free Americans, and they will vote Bush out of office come November 2nd (though they will not show up to the polls until well after noon)!
P. R. MIKE displays a sense of humor -- for once.
P. R. MIKE displays a sense of humor -- for once.
And because the SUPERDUPERMEGABLOGGERS at POWER LINE!!!!! mentioned it, I'm now following that silly Iowa Exchange AND TradeSports.com, meaning I'm spending much of my time hypnotizing myself with red and green numbers and squiggly lines going up and down.
One other thing: how many of the traders are REPUBLICANS?
One other thing: how many of the traders are REPUBLICANS?
THE NEXT TIME YOU READ A GLOWING PRESS RELEASE ABOUT THE GREAT TV SHOWS AND MOVIES INUNDATING THE LAND, REMEMBER:
TRIBUNE COMPANY owns 27 TV stations (including two stations in each of five markets), a radio station, and a 22% stake in Time Warner's The WB;
HEARST CORPORATION owns a majority stake in Hearst-Argyle Television, which owns 25 TV stations and has a production deal with GE Bancorp's TV and movie unit; stakes in numerous cable channels including ESPN and Lifetime, and two radio stations direct;
E. W. SCRIPPS owns ten TV stations and five cable channels;
GANNETT owns 21 TV stations (two in Jacksonville);
ADVANCE PUBLICATIONS owns numerous cable systems;
THE WASHINGTON POST COMPANY owns six TV stations and cable systems in nineteen states.
AND LEST WE FORGET:
Percent of Daily Circulation Belonging to Largest Newspaper Groups
Percent of Sunday Circulation Belonging to Largest Newspaper Groups
TRIBUNE COMPANY owns 27 TV stations (including two stations in each of five markets), a radio station, and a 22% stake in Time Warner's The WB;
HEARST CORPORATION owns a majority stake in Hearst-Argyle Television, which owns 25 TV stations and has a production deal with GE Bancorp's TV and movie unit; stakes in numerous cable channels including ESPN and Lifetime, and two radio stations direct;
E. W. SCRIPPS owns ten TV stations and five cable channels;
GANNETT owns 21 TV stations (two in Jacksonville);
ADVANCE PUBLICATIONS owns numerous cable systems;
THE WASHINGTON POST COMPANY owns six TV stations and cable systems in nineteen states.
AND LEST WE FORGET:
Percent of Daily Circulation Belonging to Largest Newspaper Groups
Percent of Sunday Circulation Belonging to Largest Newspaper Groups
NETWORK TELEVISION'S COMING BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OR:
Broadcast Media Group
Eight Network-Affiliated TV Stations and Two Radio Stations
Who are we?
TV: Four CBS-, two NBC- and two ABC-affiliated stations....
WHAT'S GOOD FOR TIME WARNER IS GOOD FOR AMERICA!!!!!
OR:
Broadcast Media Group
Eight Network-Affiliated TV Stations and Two Radio Stations
Who are we?
TV: Four CBS-, two NBC- and two ABC-affiliated stations....
WHAT'S GOOD FOR TIME WARNER IS GOOD FOR AMERICA!!!!!
Oiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii! An NRO piece made it to the TOP of Top Stories in G000,000,000,000,000gle News (THAT should shut up the conspiracy theorists for a while), so I click on it and it's twenty grafs of kvetching about bias -- then I jump to the end and SURE ENOUGH, the author works for BRENT!!!!! Such exercises are a reason the Web is so often a wild goose chase.
Hope you con-SER-vatives are HAPPY!
Hope you con-SER-vatives are HAPPY!
Some exceptionally hopeful news for you to consider, YAHWEH:
An eight-year scheme to inflate circulation at the Chicago Sun-Times overstated sales of the newspaper by as many as 50,000 copies per day, its parent company reported Tuesday.
Does that $100 million include the ACCOUNTANTS?
An eight-year scheme to inflate circulation at the Chicago Sun-Times overstated sales of the newspaper by as many as 50,000 copies per day, its parent company reported Tuesday.
Does that $100 million include the ACCOUNTANTS?
Sterno! STERNO!!!!! RADIO HAS BEEN LIBERATED!!!!!!!!!!! YAHWEH'S DOING HIS SHOW ON SATELLITE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE GREATEST BROADCASTER IN ALL HISTORY is FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pffh-hh-hh!
OR:
Our financial obligations under the agreement are material, and consist of both fixed and incentive payments. These obligations are payable partly in cash and partly in shares of our common stock. [TRANSLATION: THEY'RE DOING WHAT SUMNER DID!!!!!]
We estimate that we will recoup our fixed obligations under the agreement when we acquire approximately 1,000,000 incremental subscribers. This estimate is based upon a number of significant assumptions (which we believe to be reasonable but which contain significant uncertainties), including the timing and costs of acquiring such subscribers and the length of time such individuals remain subscribers. [And assuming millions of adolescent deadbeats PAY UP.] In addition, if we achieve the incentive milestones contained in the agreement, we believe that the material positive effects on our business will far outweigh the related incentive payments. [Pray, brother-- PRAY!]
Our aggregate fixed obligations under the agreement are approximately $100 million per year. These costs include production and operating costs for the show, including compensation of show cast and staff, overhead, construction costs for a dedicated studio, a budget for the development of additional programming and marketing concepts, and payments to Stern and his agent. [TRANSLATION: They're spending ANNUALLY as much on ka-ka jokes and wee-wee jokes as on a FEATURE FILM!]
We are also obligated to make substantial stock-based incentive payments under the agreement if we significantly exceed agreed upon year-end subscriber targets during the term of the agreement, or acquire material amounts of subscribers during the term directly and trackably through Stern's efforts. [SUMNER SQUARED!!!!!] In addition, upon reaching an agreed upon number of subscribers, we will share a portion of the revenue we derive directly from advertising on the Stern channels [TRANSLATION: The freeloaders will pay up -- AND GET ADS! Big subscriber boost there!], and the revenue we derive from subscribers acquired during the term directly and trackably through Stern's efforts.
We believe that our agreement with Stern will have a material positive benefit to our business, including a positive impact on consumer awareness, average revenue per subscriber, churn [SEASICK ENOUGH?!?!?] and partner relations. Nevertheless, in the event we generate substantially fewer than 1,000,000 subscribers in excess of our current plans due to the addition of Stern to our programming line-up [!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!], the large fixed obligations under the agreement with Stern could have a material negative impact on our financial condition and results of operations.
OR:
WHO WANTS TO LAY ODDS ON A CHAPTER XI? (Then again, as P. R. MEL and P. R. MIKE proved, it does not pay to bet against a man with an ARMY REGIMENT of PUBLICISTS.)
P. S. STERNO and YAHWEH, WONKETTE and SEX, ANDY S. and GAY MARRIAGE, little and YASSIR -- WE NEED SOMEONE TO LIBERATE US FROM SUPERMEGABLOGGERS.
P. P. S. Did they mention ADVERTISING and MARKETING COSTS? DIDN'T THINK SO!
Pffh-hh-hh!
OR:
Our financial obligations under the agreement are material, and consist of both fixed and incentive payments. These obligations are payable partly in cash and partly in shares of our common stock. [TRANSLATION: THEY'RE DOING WHAT SUMNER DID!!!!!]
We estimate that we will recoup our fixed obligations under the agreement when we acquire approximately 1,000,000 incremental subscribers. This estimate is based upon a number of significant assumptions (which we believe to be reasonable but which contain significant uncertainties), including the timing and costs of acquiring such subscribers and the length of time such individuals remain subscribers. [And assuming millions of adolescent deadbeats PAY UP.] In addition, if we achieve the incentive milestones contained in the agreement, we believe that the material positive effects on our business will far outweigh the related incentive payments. [Pray, brother-- PRAY!]
Our aggregate fixed obligations under the agreement are approximately $100 million per year. These costs include production and operating costs for the show, including compensation of show cast and staff, overhead, construction costs for a dedicated studio, a budget for the development of additional programming and marketing concepts, and payments to Stern and his agent. [TRANSLATION: They're spending ANNUALLY as much on ka-ka jokes and wee-wee jokes as on a FEATURE FILM!]
We are also obligated to make substantial stock-based incentive payments under the agreement if we significantly exceed agreed upon year-end subscriber targets during the term of the agreement, or acquire material amounts of subscribers during the term directly and trackably through Stern's efforts. [SUMNER SQUARED!!!!!] In addition, upon reaching an agreed upon number of subscribers, we will share a portion of the revenue we derive directly from advertising on the Stern channels [TRANSLATION: The freeloaders will pay up -- AND GET ADS! Big subscriber boost there!], and the revenue we derive from subscribers acquired during the term directly and trackably through Stern's efforts.
We believe that our agreement with Stern will have a material positive benefit to our business, including a positive impact on consumer awareness, average revenue per subscriber, churn [SEASICK ENOUGH?!?!?] and partner relations. Nevertheless, in the event we generate substantially fewer than 1,000,000 subscribers in excess of our current plans due to the addition of Stern to our programming line-up [!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!], the large fixed obligations under the agreement with Stern could have a material negative impact on our financial condition and results of operations.
OR:
WHO WANTS TO LAY ODDS ON A CHAPTER XI? (Then again, as P. R. MEL and P. R. MIKE proved, it does not pay to bet against a man with an ARMY REGIMENT of PUBLICISTS.)
P. S. STERNO and YAHWEH, WONKETTE and SEX, ANDY S. and GAY MARRIAGE, little and YASSIR -- WE NEED SOMEONE TO LIBERATE US FROM SUPERMEGABLOGGERS.
P. P. S. Did they mention ADVERTISING and MARKETING COSTS? DIDN'T THINK SO!
The Country Music Association Awards are coming to New York.
That's okay. It hasn't been country music in years.
That's okay. It hasn't been country music in years.
Re Fassihi: "Why the hell did that e-mail get her in trouble?"
I can think of a few reasons, ROMY -- the fact that NEWS HACKS have hated the military for going on forty years; the fact that bad news in Iraq elects a DEMOCRAT in the White House, and the harping on it becomes a form of press bias; the fact that the JERRRNALISSST works for The Wall Street Journals Liberal Edition and, like all scribblers for the CERTS of NEWS, is morally and politically suspect; the fact that -- you want me to go ON, ROMY?
I can think of a few reasons, ROMY -- the fact that NEWS HACKS have hated the military for going on forty years; the fact that bad news in Iraq elects a DEMOCRAT in the White House, and the harping on it becomes a form of press bias; the fact that the JERRRNALISSST works for The Wall Street Journals Liberal Edition and, like all scribblers for the CERTS of NEWS, is morally and politically suspect; the fact that -- you want me to go ON, ROMY?
When I see the graffiti on the walls and the scratchiti on the el cars I think, medicalizing youth isn't such a bad idea.
BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH....
Dick Cheney does his job taking care of Edwards, putting Kerry's record back on the table, and setting the president up for the next debate.
ABC noted that more Republicans watched the debate than Democrats, which mostly explains Cheney's victory in their poll (it was just a straight survey of registered voters who watched the debate). If you correct for that, they show it as a tie. The CBS poll included only uncommitted voters and was sharply favorable to Edwards.
In summary, then, it looks like Edwards won.
BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH....
Dick Cheney does his job taking care of Edwards, putting Kerry's record back on the table, and setting the president up for the next debate.
ABC noted that more Republicans watched the debate than Democrats, which mostly explains Cheney's victory in their poll (it was just a straight survey of registered voters who watched the debate). If you correct for that, they show it as a tie. The CBS poll included only uncommitted voters and was sharply favorable to Edwards.
In summary, then, it looks like Edwards won.
BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH....
Tuesday, October 05, 2004
Thirty states ready to ban abortion if Roe overturned
UNBIASED REPOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRTERRRRRRRRRRS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
UNBIASED REPOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRTERRRRRRRRRRS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Largely out of jealousy I've razzed Mr. Bleat as one of the SUPERMEGABLOGGERS, i.e., a blowhard with luck and cutesy graphics. That may not have been just. I'm truly impressed at times with his insights, and today, reviewing a B noir flick of the 1940s, he has outdone himself.
These last few days I've been reading what I fear will be the sole volume of Gary Giddins's projected two-book biography of Der Bingle, and the best and a most amusing chapter concerns the idiot Paramount publicists who could have given DAN BLATHER's crew a run for their money at lying (especially now as they'd work for the same company). One paragraph applies as much to today as it did to the 1930s, when at least the gold of the movies excused the dross of the publicity:
The power and arrogance of publicists was no secret. Hollywood lampooned them mercilessly, invariably portraying them as unscrupulous, ruthless, alcoholic, and utterly indifferent to the desires of the lost souls consigned to their unctuous hands....But the contempt of their associates by no means diminished the press agents' hold on the public's credulity. They were abetted by entertainment editors who cheerfully accomodated them, sometimes appending a reporter's byline to a standard press release.
USA OKAY!!!!!, Mrs. Slut, the DONALD -- the more things change....
The power and arrogance of publicists was no secret. Hollywood lampooned them mercilessly, invariably portraying them as unscrupulous, ruthless, alcoholic, and utterly indifferent to the desires of the lost souls consigned to their unctuous hands....But the contempt of their associates by no means diminished the press agents' hold on the public's credulity. They were abetted by entertainment editors who cheerfully accomodated them, sometimes appending a reporter's byline to a standard press release.
USA OKAY!!!!!, Mrs. Slut, the DONALD -- the more things change....
With jobs going overseas and the economy stuck in neutral, more students are gravitating toward a cluster of highly specialized new majors, hoping these will give them an edge in a competitive job market. Popular choices include sports sales, video-game development, casino studies, and homeland security.
Driving interest in many of these fields is the perception that they will prove lucrative.
Oh they're lucrative, all right. Lucrative for colleges. Ka-CHINNNNNNNNNNG!
Driving interest in many of these fields is the perception that they will prove lucrative.
Oh they're lucrative, all right. Lucrative for colleges. Ka-CHINNNNNNNNNNG!
You KNEW there'd be a catch: CHEAP CHANNEL's devoting less time to commercials, right? So guess what? IT'S PLAYING MORE COMMERCIALS! Meaning in practice the average radio listener won't tell the difference between five minutes of sixties and four minutes of thirties, meaning the average radio listener will still think THERE ARE TOO MANY ADS. GO FOR IT, LITTLE MARKIE!
NEWS HACKS LIKE MARVIN KALB SAY I LOVE YOU -- TO HENRY THE K!!!!!
... I did wish you well from the bottom of my heart, the wisdom and the grace and the tolerance that are going to be so necessary to success because I very much have the feeling in the long sweep of history perhaps that your tenure is going to prove to be larger than simply something that has to do with diplomacy. There's a human and a psychological component here which has to be vindicated in a major way and I feel that very strongly and I wish you towering good luck.
...and WE LOVE YOU TOO -- for being ASSES.
... I did wish you well from the bottom of my heart, the wisdom and the grace and the tolerance that are going to be so necessary to success because I very much have the feeling in the long sweep of history perhaps that your tenure is going to prove to be larger than simply something that has to do with diplomacy. There's a human and a psychological component here which has to be vindicated in a major way and I feel that very strongly and I wish you towering good luck.
...and WE LOVE YOU TOO -- for being ASSES.
Dooo-do-dooo-doo-doo-doo-doot! FLASH!!
E&P's online editor admits he doesn't read print newspapers
We suspect that virus is rapidly spreading.
E&P's online editor admits he doesn't read print newspapers
We suspect that virus is rapidly spreading.
Cleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-VER!
When Dan Rather finally admitted that fake memos might have been used in his "60 Minutes Wednesday" report on President Bush's National Guard Service, political insiders immediately suspected the hand of Karl Rove.
Rove has vehemently denied the speculation. But, as the Atlantic Monthly's Joshua Green points out in the upcoming issue, Bush's political guru has earned quite a reputation for using dirty tricks in the heat of a campaign.
OR:
Joshua Green [was] an editor at The Washington Monthly and a former staff writer at The American Prospect.
Trying to shake off those rumors about your JOB, Lloyd?
When Dan Rather finally admitted that fake memos might have been used in his "60 Minutes Wednesday" report on President Bush's National Guard Service, political insiders immediately suspected the hand of Karl Rove.
Rove has vehemently denied the speculation. But, as the Atlantic Monthly's Joshua Green points out in the upcoming issue, Bush's political guru has earned quite a reputation for using dirty tricks in the heat of a campaign.
OR:
Joshua Green [was] an editor at The Washington Monthly and a former staff writer at The American Prospect.
Trying to shake off those rumors about your JOB, Lloyd?
Between Kirkus charging for book reviews and the PAPER OF RECORD BOOK REVIEW getting HEP the publishing biz isn't as virgin as some people think it is.
Monday, October 04, 2004
The GET-A-LIFE!!!!! crowd is debating whether LUCAS SPIELBERG has a RIGHT to change His properties.
Maybe if you folks GOT A LIFE you wouldn't worry about some superbillionzillionaire and start doing some good.
Maybe if you folks GOT A LIFE you wouldn't worry about some superbillionzillionaire and start doing some good.
In light of the fact that Lowry Mays suffered a blood clot in his brain back in April (did YOU hear about it?) we will cease calling him "Lowsy." That said, we will NOT stop calling it CHEAP CHANNEL, even more so now that the advertiser-supported tyrant of the airwaves is "adapting to realities" by lobbying Congressjerks and going PC. What NEWT and THE FUNERAL DIRECTOR started, Little Markie can FINISH -- and he'll finish off radio if we're lucky.
"ANYONE WHO LIP-SYNCHS IN PUBLIC ON STAGE WHEN YOU PAY £75 TO SEE THEM SHOULD BE SHOT!!!!!"
We would say "she's lost it" but we wouldn't have the slightest idea who we were talking about.
We would say "she's lost it" but we wouldn't have the slightest idea who we were talking about.
I can hear OMERTA now: "A CONSERVATIVE NEWS ORGANIZATION BY DEFINITION CAN'T BE TRUTHFUL!!!!!"
Hey buddy, I think you liberals could say that about yourselves.
P. S.
To protect against the Iraqi intelligence documents being altered or misrepresented elsewhere on the Internet, CNSNews.com has decided to publish only the first of the 42 pages in Arabic, along with the English translation. Portions of some of the other memos in translated form are also being published to accompany this report. Credentialed journalists and counter-terrorism experts seeking to view the 42 pages of Arabic documents or to challenge their authenticity may make arrangements to do so at CNSNews.com headquarters in Alexandria, Va.
I don't think VIACON NETWORK NEWS did THAT.
Hey buddy, I think you liberals could say that about yourselves.
P. S.
To protect against the Iraqi intelligence documents being altered or misrepresented elsewhere on the Internet, CNSNews.com has decided to publish only the first of the 42 pages in Arabic, along with the English translation. Portions of some of the other memos in translated form are also being published to accompany this report. Credentialed journalists and counter-terrorism experts seeking to view the 42 pages of Arabic documents or to challenge their authenticity may make arrangements to do so at CNSNews.com headquarters in Alexandria, Va.
I don't think VIACON NETWORK NEWS did THAT.
I really DON'T want to read TEN PAGES (or however many) of CW about MICKEYMOUSE NIXON and HARVEY WHINER, and if that's what THE NEW! IMPROVED!! NEW YORK!!! has for its readers it ought to stand in line behind the laddierags.
Sorry if I keep linking to OMERTA'S PAPER OF RECORD WEST today, but it has so many INTERESTING THINGS, like this piece of junk, linked through ROMY:
AT THE CORE OF THE RELENTLESS PARTISAN ASSAULT ON THE AMERICAN NEWS MEDIA'S TRADITION THAT GOOD JOURNALISM CAN AND SHOULD BE UNBIASED....
Yeah yeah, we know what you mean MERT. PARTISAN=CONSERVATIVE. You don't have to tell us. Anyway, you're mad, MERT, that THE WALL STREET JOURNALS LIBERAL EDITION'S star SLANT -- JERRRNALLIST outed her biases. You're mad that we now know she worked as a "translator" in IRAN. You're mad because you agreed with her, and now that conservatives are complaining it's somewhat more difficult for her to slan -- WORK; the LIBERAL EDITION'S EDITOR is telling her to KEEP HER BIASES QUIET UNTIL AFTER THE ELECTION. In short, another six-digit goes WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH in the luxury day care news suite.
AT THE CORE OF THE RELENTLESS PARTISAN ASSAULT ON THE AMERICAN NEWS MEDIA'S TRADITION THAT GOOD JOURNALISM CAN AND SHOULD BE UNBIASED....
Yeah yeah, we know what you mean MERT. PARTISAN=CONSERVATIVE. You don't have to tell us. Anyway, you're mad, MERT, that THE WALL STREET JOURNALS LIBERAL EDITION'S star SLANT -- JERRRNALLIST outed her biases. You're mad that we now know she worked as a "translator" in IRAN. You're mad because you agreed with her, and now that conservatives are complaining it's somewhat more difficult for her to slan -- WORK; the LIBERAL EDITION'S EDITOR is telling her to KEEP HER BIASES QUIET UNTIL AFTER THE ELECTION. In short, another six-digit goes WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH in the luxury day care news suite.
OH oh, a J'ACCUSE might stand in the way of baseball's new Taj Mahal in DC!
PINCH! PINCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PINCH! PINCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLEBLOGGER IS NOT WORKING PROPERLY. At what point does this become enough of a problem that the IDIOTS who want to send GOOG to $5,000 a share get to notice?
Perhaps DIP's campaign is right to be ticked at the VRWC over this (I didn't post on this story given the speculation), but a Google of "Kerry Nixon" yields 277,000 hits, and if DIP and Tricky Dick weren't cloned they're not divided by too many degrees of separation.
Americans win Nobel Prize for smell studies
One thing's sure: they couldn't do their work during an ELECTION.
One thing's sure: they couldn't do their work during an ELECTION.
In politics, though, the definition of what's right can be slippery, and it is becoming the core question in Boxer's attempt for a third term in the Senate.
How did this line escape the eagle eye and vulture brain of OMERTA?
How did this line escape the eagle eye and vulture brain of OMERTA?
Sunday, October 03, 2004
Another reason to think G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE shares have nowhere to go but Up, Up, UP!!!!!: It posts a story that the main oxygen tank on the Orbiting Rattletrap has failed and the astronauts have to go on back-up. Unfortunately G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE's battery of computers did not notice this story was first posted on September 9.
Neither, it appears, did CBS News (see the date in the URL).
Neither, it appears, did CBS News (see the date in the URL).
KERRY FOR PRESIDENT -- I mean CURLEY'S (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) STOOGES -- say(s) the EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL DUBYA and his RASPUTIN KARL have a TRICK READY for OCTOBER.
If MSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. PELOSI didn't shake this campaign press agent's hand for a job well done, she should have. More to the point, it seems the Demwits don't want to capture ELVIS -- at any time (assuming he's alive, that is).
If MSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. PELOSI didn't shake this campaign press agent's hand for a job well done, she should have. More to the point, it seems the Demwits don't want to capture ELVIS -- at any time (assuming he's alive, that is).
America's patriotic broadcasters reap their quadrennial reward! BUT (Larry Sabato alert):
When all the political dust has cleared, do all those ads really make a difference?
Maybe not, says Larry J. Sabato, a University of Virginia political analyst, "but the campaigns are afraid to find out. Part of it is just keeping up with the Joneses."
Why can't somebody FIND OUT?
When all the political dust has cleared, do all those ads really make a difference?
Maybe not, says Larry J. Sabato, a University of Virginia political analyst, "but the campaigns are afraid to find out. Part of it is just keeping up with the Joneses."
Why can't somebody FIND OUT?
In truth, the news business had a disastrous summer. In July, a Senate intelligence committee and an official British investigation both concluded that President Bush had been on firm ground when he spoke the famous 16 words in his 2003 State of the Union message (that the British had learned Saddam Hussein had sought to acquire uranium in Africa). When the 16 words appeared to be untrue, the press endlessly trumpeted them, often on the front page, but when Bush drew heavy support from the two investigations, you could hardly find the news with a magnifying glass. In the New York Times, the British report was carried way inside the paper and read like a muddled translation from classical Urdu. This seems to happen a lot when the Times is forced to report news it doesn't like. On July 25, the Washington Post press critic, Howard Kurtz, reported that his newspaper had carried 96 references to the issue when Bush appeared to be wrong and only two after the revelation that he looked to be right. The totals for the three major networks and three elite newspapers, including the Los Angeles Times, were 302 before and nine after. According to Kurtz, CBS never did get around to mentioning that the investigations had supported the president.
HOORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!! CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPBRAVO!!!!!!!!!! BRAVO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!
CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPHOORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!! BRAVO!!!!!!!!!! BRAVO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!
A BIG FAT ZERO to The National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign for subjecting me to a Macromedia Flash ad I COULDN'T TURN OFF.
HOORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!! CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPBRAVO!!!!!!!!!! BRAVO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!
CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPHOORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!! BRAVO!!!!!!!!!! BRAVO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!
A BIG FAT ZERO to The National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign for subjecting me to a Macromedia Flash ad I COULDN'T TURN OFF.
And when DAN BLATHER gets his LOUD, PROLONGED STANDING OVATION tomorrow, what will it be for? For palming off forgeries? For standing by the forgeries when the rest of the world already knew? For stonewalling? For getting back at a president who razzed him for the DEAD AIR INCIDENT?
To update St. Edward of Murrow, television is merely glass, phosphors, chips and wires in a box.
Another prediction: after the standing O, DAN BLATHER CRIES.
P. S. This celebration is being cosponsored by the UNITY CONFERENCE, the fraud that cheered DIP, and laughed at and booed Dubya.
P. P. S.
Rather's refusal to discuss the National Guard story reflects a recent tight-lipped strategy at CBS News, which drew criticism for defending the Sept. 8 story for nearly two weeks and is hoping the controversy will fade. CBS recently hired Manhattan super-flack Howard Rubenstein to help with damage control. Rubenstein confirmed the hiring but declined to comment on his role.
Imagine if Johnson and Johnson had taken this tack with Tylenol. MORONS.
To update St. Edward of Murrow, television is merely glass, phosphors, chips and wires in a box.
Another prediction: after the standing O, DAN BLATHER CRIES.
P. S. This celebration is being cosponsored by the UNITY CONFERENCE, the fraud that cheered DIP, and laughed at and booed Dubya.
P. P. S.
Rather's refusal to discuss the National Guard story reflects a recent tight-lipped strategy at CBS News, which drew criticism for defending the Sept. 8 story for nearly two weeks and is hoping the controversy will fade. CBS recently hired Manhattan super-flack Howard Rubenstein to help with damage control. Rubenstein confirmed the hiring but declined to comment on his role.
Imagine if Johnson and Johnson had taken this tack with Tylenol. MORONS.
LAUGH OF THE DAY:
New research shows that more than 23 million people are still using peer-to-peer services, often to trade music and movies illegally. And worse yet — experts say the RIAA's scare tactics are beginning to be ignored.
Only three reasons for this: 1. CDs still cost too much; 2. Music files are easy to transfer; and 3. TODAY'S POP MUSIC AND MOVIES AREN'T WORTH PAYING FOR.
New research shows that more than 23 million people are still using peer-to-peer services, often to trade music and movies illegally. And worse yet — experts say the RIAA's scare tactics are beginning to be ignored.
Only three reasons for this: 1. CDs still cost too much; 2. Music files are easy to transfer; and 3. TODAY'S POP MUSIC AND MOVIES AREN'T WORTH PAYING FOR.
Tired Pope Beatifies Mel Gibon's 'Muse' [very well-deserved SIC]
OR:
The pope has now beatified some 1,340 people, more than all his predecessors combined.
Are beatifications another form of British knighthoods?
OR:
The pope has now beatified some 1,340 people, more than all his predecessors combined.
Are beatifications another form of British knighthoods?
Nuts-and-bolts term anticipated for Supreme Court
We could say something given all the social engineering the NINE FINGERS have up their robes, but we'll pass for now.
We could say something given all the social engineering the NINE FINGERS have up their robes, but we'll pass for now.
Minnie Marx sired the Marx Brothers. That was nothing. Joe Simpson sired two untalented airheads.
THE PAPER OF RECORD devotes 2,407 WORDS to this staggering achievement. HOWELL NEVER LEFT.
THE PAPER OF RECORD devotes 2,407 WORDS to this staggering achievement. HOWELL NEVER LEFT.
If G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLEBLOGGER gets much SLOWER its parent may equal the NYSE'S TOTAL MARKET CAP!!!!!!!!!!
G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000gle is a good search engine (and a STINKY blogging service) and eventually one will come along that's better. But with the sales -- ANALYSTS price-targeting and the Goog so many people's home page I would not bet on competition soon.
(I found this on Google News.)
(I found this on Google News.)
This is the moment Mr. MARK LIVES for -- to TELL PEOPLE HOW TO VO...to BE THE CLARION OF TRUTH, JUSTICE AND THE AMERI...the RIGH...er, the CORRECT WAY!!!!!
Note the update time. Mr. Mark did some late night table pounding!
Unfortunately, even the God of the Newsrag cannot erase every shred of doubt:
• Howard Fineman: Beware Debate Spinners
(Fortunately, this is a WEB EXCLUSIVE.)
Note the update time. Mr. Mark did some late night table pounding!
Unfortunately, even the God of the Newsrag cannot erase every shred of doubt:
• Howard Fineman: Beware Debate Spinners
(Fortunately, this is a WEB EXCLUSIVE.)
Saturday, October 02, 2004
In fairness to the Decayed Triumvirate (and it is difficult on their huge wealth) Web politicking can often degenerate into mobocracy. Witness little's Tarzan yells over a professor who attempted to refute that the Rathergate memos were frauds. InstaPundit has said the Web can't destroy reputations, and he is ostensibly wrong; God knows how many (to use that classic phrase) "urban legends" it's launched, without clear or easy refutation. I feel sorry for this man, caught up now in hundreds of angry e-mails.
In further fairness though, he should have made it quite clear from the start which presidential candidate he contributed to -- and he should have been more careful with his superscripts.
In further fairness though, he should have made it quite clear from the start which presidential candidate he contributed to -- and he should have been more careful with his superscripts.
Wanna bet that when DAN BLATHER appears at that NEWS HACK CONFAB he gets a LONG and LOUD STANDING OVATION?
It's official: they're striking a Joe Louis pose and calling RATHERGATE a JIHAD. Isn't it enough for the media-industrial complex to have a stainless-steel fist in a titanium glove? Their contempt for the people who make their zillion-dollar salaries possible is off the scale.
NOTE THE URL. These guys CAN'T be taken fully seriously anymore.
It's official: they're striking a Joe Louis pose and calling RATHERGATE a JIHAD. Isn't it enough for the media-industrial complex to have a stainless-steel fist in a titanium glove? Their contempt for the people who make their zillion-dollar salaries possible is off the scale.
NOTE THE URL. These guys CAN'T be taken fully seriously anymore.
Freepers are in a PANIC because WALTER WINCHELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! posted that St. Warren's NEWSRAG has DIP IN THE LEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
One of the posters linked to this analysis of state voting trends, and after unsuccessfully rummaging through it (and St. Warren's explication) I'm convinced more than ever: polling is alchemy with numbers.
One of the posters linked to this analysis of state voting trends, and after unsuccessfully rummaging through it (and St. Warren's explication) I'm convinced more than ever: polling is alchemy with numbers.
Camera-phone phreaks are MAD that they have to PAY to download their PICTURES.
Your toy is a potential invasion of MY PRIVACY. Serves you RIGHT.
Your toy is a potential invasion of MY PRIVACY. Serves you RIGHT.
Notice something about this ad?
The quotation marks. I'm not sure DIP's gang should've done it. We know NEWS HACKS are campaigning for ORANGEMAN; the fake quotes merely CONFIRM it.
The quotation marks. I'm not sure DIP's gang should've done it. We know NEWS HACKS are campaigning for ORANGEMAN; the fake quotes merely CONFIRM it.
"The role of a free press is to be the people's eyes and ears, providing not just information but access, insight and most importantly context."
It took NINETEEN PEOPLE to write THIS?!?!?
And natch, the blurb's a total rave. You never know when your quote might pop up in an AD.
It took NINETEEN PEOPLE to write THIS?!?!?
And natch, the blurb's a total rave. You never know when your quote might pop up in an AD.
Bruce Springsteen and R.E.M. frontman Michael Stipe stayed on message....
You wonder how much of such talk CURLEY'S (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) STOOGES do in the KERRY CAMPAIGN HEADQU -- THE CURLEY NEWSROOM.
And I KNOW we wouldn't run a hed like this:
Springsteen and R.E.M. play politics in Philadelphia
Oops!
You wonder how much of such talk CURLEY'S (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) STOOGES do in the KERRY CAMPAIGN HEADQU -- THE CURLEY NEWSROOM.
And I KNOW we wouldn't run a hed like this:
Springsteen and R.E.M. play politics in Philadelphia
Oops!
Vitamins only take you closer to death
HindustanTimes.com only takes you closer to throwing your computer out the window with all its POP-UPS.
HindustanTimes.com only takes you closer to throwing your computer out the window with all its POP-UPS.
Had all those agents been chasing phantoms? Had the $100-million security operation been a waste? Or had it deterred an attack?
I'd wager on the first two; then again, it should be difficult to make a statement in an armed fortress.
I'd wager on the first two; then again, it should be difficult to make a statement in an armed fortress.
Friday, October 01, 2004
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Let me guess -- ANOTHER NEW HIGH for G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE!!!!!
(Close; it was up over three points.)
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Let me guess -- ANOTHER NEW HIGH for G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE!!!!!
(Close; it was up over three points.)
Media divided on who won
Hedging our bet, SUMNER?
Hedging our bet, SUMNER?
Wall Street's greedmeisters have decided; the Dow's up 96.
Evidently DIPPITY-DO!! made a GAFFE last night, so DIP'S TOAST. Even more noteworthy: a hard-leftist noticed it.
ELECTIONS SHOULD NOT BE DECIDED BY GAFFES!!!!!
That said, WILL SOMEONE TELL DIP NEITHER FRANCE NOR THE LEAGUE OF NATIONS SHOULD DICTATE OUR FOREIGN POLICY?
ELECTIONS SHOULD NOT BE DECIDED BY GAFFES!!!!!
That said, WILL SOMEONE TELL DIP NEITHER FRANCE NOR THE LEAGUE OF NATIONS SHOULD DICTATE OUR FOREIGN POLICY?
And when not summoning the ghosts of CONCEPT ALBUMS past, The DUBIOUS-PSEUDO-SCIENCE-RELIGION MONITOR assumes the Thinker's pose about movies with -- stereotypes:
Critics of "Shark Tale" say statistics prove the power of the movies to shape public perception. A recent poll from Research Analysis Corporation of New Jersey found that 74 percent of all Americans associate Italian surnames with organized crime. Yet, according to the FBI, even at the height of the Mafia's power, no more than 5,000 out of the 15 million Italian-Americans have ever been associated with the Mafia or any other crime group.
HOW MANY MAFIA DONS ARE NAMED STANKOWICZ?
Critics of "Shark Tale" say statistics prove the power of the movies to shape public perception. A recent poll from Research Analysis Corporation of New Jersey found that 74 percent of all Americans associate Italian surnames with organized crime. Yet, according to the FBI, even at the height of the Mafia's power, no more than 5,000 out of the 15 million Italian-Americans have ever been associated with the Mafia or any other crime group.
HOW MANY MAFIA DONS ARE NAMED STANKOWICZ?
A surprising mix of bands is attempting a fresh revival of the concept album.
BRING BACK THE SINGLE!
The fresh spate of concept albums tackle many topics, but politics is an especially popular theme.
TRANSLATION: Bush=Hitler.
AND:
C'mon, c'mon -- WHERE'S MY INNER BEETHOVEN?
BRING BACK THE SINGLE!
The fresh spate of concept albums tackle many topics, but politics is an especially popular theme.
TRANSLATION: Bush=Hitler.
AND:
C'mon, c'mon -- WHERE'S MY INNER BEETHOVEN?
Well, not everybody at NRO is CW.
I confess I did not watch the joint press conference. Aside from it being past my bedtime what could I learn from it that I didn't know being a voracious denizen of the Web? Besides, a "debate" that's about "body language," "facial ticks" and "one-liners" is NOT a debate whatever the RIGHT-WING GLIBERAL says.
I confess I did not watch the joint press conference. Aside from it being past my bedtime what could I learn from it that I didn't know being a voracious denizen of the Web? Besides, a "debate" that's about "body language," "facial ticks" and "one-liners" is NOT a debate whatever the RIGHT-WING GLIBERAL says.
Two hits I will NOT make:
• CNN Blogs: Begala Novak
• CNN Blogs: Begala Novak
OR:
Kerry's oratory was the greatest in world history, and BUSH STUNK!!!!!
Despite his brilliant effort, my sources in the Bush campaign are worried....
We already have enough reason not to read blogs. Here are two more.
A different kind of CW: THE BEST DEBATE IN WORLD HISTORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And THAT comes from the GLIBERAL OF THE RIGHT, figures.
And THAT comes from the GLIBERAL OF THE RIGHT, figures.
Some people will work mightily hard to see that statistics are indistinguishable from lies and damn lies -- and they're called POLLSTERS.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, WE GET THE MESSAGE -- YOUR BOY WON!
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, WE GET THE MESSAGE -- YOUR BOY WON!
WE WANT KERRY! WE WANT KERRY!
OR:
It was a BRILLIANT documentary.
Now let's keep up the momentum, as I know we will.
OR:
It was a BRILLIANT documentary.
Now let's keep up the momentum, as I know we will.