Posted 5:51 PM by Gene

Today, trying to figure out which vintage movies to choose from Oldies.com, I turn to an inconvenient site filled with the opinions of Pauline Kael. Now I discover there's a tragedy to her career: at her best, and there's no denying how good she was at her best, she was perhaps the most insightful and forceful movie writer there ever was. When she calls a film "a real stinker" (as with the noir mellerdrammer Whirlpool) or "too terrible to be boring" (as with the immortal Lucille Ball disaster Mame) you know she's right. At her best she could make you laugh out loud: her just evisceration of the musical Lost Horizon remains a classic in invective. The tragedy, of course, is that in time she came to think herself better than her audience, and her gaga typing over select movies cemented the notion of her era as BETTER THAN EVER!, and then came her sellout work for the masterpiece NASHVILLE and the consulting jobs that followed, and her reviews became more and more raves -- and hanging over them all were The Sound of Music and NIXON. Worst of all she sired two generations of fifth-rate adjective spewers who think they're being Kael when they type out their flackery above the titles; for this influence she helped widen the gulf between commerce and art, and nearly every BEST PIC-TURE OS-CAR® winner of the last forty years bows in humble memory of the woman. And so we must read her dazzling opinions with a grain of salt that time and her influence have turned into the Bonneville Salt Flats.

Posted 4:55 PM by Gene

Warren Buffett JR. is going to reorganize his real-es...er, SEARS HOLDINGS into "units" to try to make it run better.

I guess Warren JR. finally realizes he has to run the company. Or does he?

Posted 1:17 PM by Gene

Republican Romney Wins Nevada Caucuses

Wow, that was fast.

Does it matter?

Posted 1:03 PM by Gene

Didn't these "12 Pakistani nationals and two people from India" remember the Spaniards declared a truce with terrorists?

Posted 10:02 AM by Gene

I wish I knew why the hacks went into this brief but intense spasm of mourning over Bobby Fischer. They tell us he was a "genius". Why do I suspect with many chess masters their genius is limited to one thing and one thing only? Besides as Fischer was not the first to prove, a high-IQ man may lead a low-IQ life. Several years back after he made his nutty comments about 9-11 a magazine (and I wish I could remember which one -- I'm thinking it was The Atlantic) ran a lengthy profile of the man, and it quickly became obvious Fischer was at best the MJ of chess -- an absolute cipher. Moreover he appears to have been unhinged almost from the beginning. What especially grates is that in some ways Fischer was also Bugmeister Bill and videogame phreaks before they came along -- a definitive geek obsessively devoted to the complete mastery of trivia. Why should we celebrate a man who did little but move black and white pieces on a checkered board, and then collapsed into political hysteria?

P. S. on 1/20 at 1:35 p.m. It was The Atlantic. (Via Reason.com via TNR.com)

Posted 9:00 AM by Gene

Borat to the Alabama Supreme Court: High fives!

Jay to the PR staff of Fox: High six-figures!

A NEUHARTHISM OF THE MONTH AWARD TO JAY!

Posted 8:57 AM by Gene

That the White House is missing such tonnage of e-mail is testimony to its incompetence, testimony, alas, tainted by the fact it was disclosed by Hank Waxman, one of the most TV-camera-addicted tantrum throwers in Congress.

Posted 8:50 AM by Gene

Here's another number news hacks can turn into statistical fraud. $17.9 BILLION IN VIDEO GAME SALES!!!!!!!!!! Of which about half is for software. If the average game costs $30 to $50, that's maybe 300 million units. That's still a quarter of yearly movie attendance, and far far less than DVD units. I'd guess the most active game purchasers buy multiple titles, just like the movie S&M phreaks, who must see forty of fifty excretions. This number isn't important except to demonstrate when news hacks want to use an EXCLAMATION POINT!!!!!!!!! no one can challenge them.

Posted 10:23 AM by Gene

Elsewhere on the Mess, I've never heard of Entrepreneur.com, but its scribblers can sure write one mean press release for 7-Eleven!

A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD (MATT DIVISION) TO NICHOLE!

Posted 10:21 AM by Gene

CIA: Al-Qaida behind Bhutto slaying

Gee, that didn't take long to them fathom -- only about three weeks.

Posted 8:49 AM by Gene

OH oh, somebody has revived the old canard that football losses inspire violence against women, albeit in a different key. Nonetheless if one considers the football factories, with their generous doses of hormones and Budweiser helping conflagrate the bonfires of defeat, we can be certain tragic outcomes do inspire crime -- especially as the football factories are about lots of things other than civilized behavior.

Posted 8:42 AM by Gene

Does the world needs book prizes?

Does the world need movie prizes? TV prizes? Recording prizes? JERNALISM prizes? All sorts of hug-yourself-and-preen prizes?

NO.

(Via ArtsJournal)

Posted 8:41 AM by Gene

The Big Double-A Scribble reports that the Mick has pulled its ads from those Florida report cards, meaning even the biggest fast-food joint may not be immune from shame.

Posted 8:26 AM by Gene

SLIME's Paper of Record also reports the folks at Bentonville have thrown a thousand rags out of their stores, and we feel sure no one will notice, especially as lots were already out of business, and lots are out of business in all but name.

Posted 8:23 AM by Gene

Big news from Branson East: Sarah Jessica Horseyface is playing a "sexy Italian airline stewardess" in a revival of Boeing Boeing!

Couldn't we think up, say, five hundred other actresses who might be more suitable?

Meantime our favorite Branson East columnist also reports that KERNGERSHWIN HAMMERSTEIN had a raging artistic tantrum in public. Isn't he close to the age where he has to worry about his health?

Posted 8:15 AM by Gene

Bobby Fischer, the chess dweeb who became a raging loon, has died. RIP.

Posted 7:44 PM by Gene

I've got an idea! Let's add fraudulent appraisals to the mix.

It's almost as though businesspoops willed this debacle.

Posted 6:46 PM by Gene

Wind chill in Duluth could reach 60 below tonight

Aren't I glad I'm in Philly, where it's merely snowing.

Posted 6:23 PM by Gene

Dammit, the direc-TORS settled.

Now to wait, and hope, and hope to keep waiting.

Posted 5:57 PM by Gene

The next big way Wall Street can bring on a panic: screwing up bond ratings.

On top of that there's all the home-equity loans, and....

Why does the vision of DOMINOES raise its ugly presence?

Posted 5:46 PM by Gene

One of those great juxtapositions only Romy can pull off:

Political bloggers' mediocre analysis affects MSM reporting

It's only fair that professional bloggers be paid for their work

And reluctant though I am to say a kind word for Romy's favorite alternarag, I think Mr. Stark has a point:

Internet boosters have exaggerated the assets of the medium — more reporting, better reporting, more democratic reporting, accessible around the clock — in much the same way that cable supporters did when when CNN and its sister channels arrived on the scene about two decades ago. In a country that’s bamboozled by novelty, claims in support of a new technology or invention will almost always be extravagant.

The problem is that there isn’t really enough news to go around in this 24-hour, up-to-the-minute cycle. And, sadly, there aren’t enough astute thinkers to go around, either — not than anyone can be that clever all the time.

One obstacle for these thinkers is the same one that hindered writers when television first arrived on the scene in the 1950s. “Back in the old days,” once noted Bob Hope on the differences between writing for TV and writing for a comedy stage show, “you would do one sketch for five years. But if you use that sketch on TV, it’s used up in one night.” Blogging burns up good material very quickly, meaning that even the best run out and start writing, well, second-rate stuff. (And that’s on their good days.)

But it's still comedy!

Posted 5:18 PM by Gene

The clowns at Hyundai wanted their luxury boxes after all.

Posted 10:32 AM by Gene

"Our David's good sling is unerring/The Slavocrat's giant he slew/Then shout for the freedom preferring/For Lincoln and liberty, too."

Yep, campaign songs have gone decidedly downhill.

AH'M PRAYOUD T'BE A CAYYYYYYYYYYN!!!!! AMERICAYYYYYYYYYYN!!!!!

DECIDEDLY.

(Via ArtsJournal)

Posted 9:03 AM by Gene

Elsewhere in the Big V:

The United Nations is backing a $100 million film fund aimed at combating stereotypes in movies.

Pffh-hh-hh hh hh hh hh hh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!

Anyone like to guess how many people that could save from -- GENOCIDE if the League of Nations knew what it was doing?

And of COURSE eBay-financed GuiltTrip Lecture Productions is in on the deal. Hey, they know a good boondoggle when they see it!

Posted 9:00 AM by Gene

"Gas stations, gyms, sports venues, hospital rooms...commuter trains...."

NBC EVERYWHERE!!!!!

Yep, that should take care of the spinoff talk, Little Jeffy -- at $34.56.

Posted 8:53 AM by Gene

With OJ, it's arrogance and ignorance.

Posted 8:45 AM by Gene

Geeks will love this: PEOPLE WARNER CABLE is tying pricing to usage.

That should stop them from downloading movies!

Posted 8:41 AM by Gene

A Great Era For Poetry

QUOTE ONE.

(Via ArtsJournal)

Posted 8:17 AM by Gene

At The Corner they're ticked because THE EDWARD R. MURROW OF COMEDY did some radical editing of a plug by Jo-NAH. Under the circumstances we are hard pressed to say who should go to hell first.

Posted 8:13 AM by Gene

Found when accidentally clicking on the Windows Media button I left on my browser:



Bugmeister really thinks he'll be the King of Show-Biz? Doesn't he know the Lord God Steve is his superior -- for good reason?

Posted 8:08 AM by Gene

I suppose it ought to be good news that abortions are down, but too many still chose the procedure out of mere convenience, and more are taking a couple of pills to do the same thing. A nation that tolerates so many abortions and so many murders on the street is a nation with a canker in its soul.

Posted 6:44 PM by Gene

I wonder if The Lord God's Steve's whizbang got the cold shoulder because we now see $300 can do essentially the same thing?

Posted 6:39 PM by Gene

Unlike zillions of other bloggers I typed nothing about Michigan's primary thanks in part to the mess on the Democrats' side, but also because this election year things are too changeable for words -- and one may ask if the fluidity owes to a certain voter resentment in having so many tell them who to vote for.

We have a long way to go to a brokered convention.

Posted 6:31 PM by Gene

This proposed Northwest-Delta merger may be a needful action of airline consolidation, but big businessmen should be whacked when they renege on promises to help a city's economy. How many billions have guvment types wasted in trying to bribe businessmen to stay in downtowns, or open needed factories, only to have them make off with the cash, because the businessmen know they're dealing with doormats??

Posted 6:29 PM by Gene

Remember when for-profit colleges would help take care of HYER EHDYUKAYSHUN's excesses? That day has receded even further beyond the horizon.

Posted 6:24 PM by Gene

Yes, what do the bankers have up their balance sheets?

Posted 6:16 PM by Gene

We think pundits have no right to bang about English abuse when they can countenance the "floating 'hopefully'" in a post bewailing it -- and in the one two posts before it.

Posted 6:11 PM by Gene

The one rule when watching a movie bio or docudrama is to ask yourself, "How much did they lie?" Yes, we can say some lying in art may be necessary to get at what George Abbott once called "the truthier truth", long before that pestilence the ERIC SEVAREID OF COMEDY was born; but when some of us don't expect art we have less reason to suspect we'll get the truth; viewed in that spotlight what GOODTHINGS ENTERTAINMENT did is just another example of show-biz types throwing -- stuff at a wall and hoping it sticks. It stuck, all right.

Posted 6:10 PM by Gene

$900,000 doesn't buy as much in thirty seconds as it used to.

Posted 10:03 AM by Gene

No! NO! A sponsor may get out of the SUPER BORE?!?

See the mad scramble of CEOs wanting IN!

Posted 9:54 AM by Gene

Further on the preceding subject, when Branson East fans are "we's" and the people they have to "drag" to the theme parks are "not we's", there is no "us."

(Again via ArtsJournal)

Posted 8:41 AM by Gene

Shucks, one of the great MASTERPIECES of BRANSON EAST, the immortal tourist attraction based on La Boheme, is closing, for its genius to resound in the rafters, and the vaults, and the stacks of old Playbills, and the memories of the flacks at The Paper of Re-CORD.

(Via ArtsJournal, where they're very sad too)

Posted 8:37 AM by Gene

Hey! Would you like to go with me for a little walk?

Maybe we can find you a nice fresh chicken.

Posted 8:29 AM by Gene

When a "small publicity-seeking minority" shuts up the Pope, anything's possible.

Posted 8:26 AM by Gene

No sooner has the Force of EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL taken over the Wall Street Journals than He has proposed -- cutting the length of front-page STORIES!!!!! The holy jernalists are ANGERED!

Why should a story take as long to read as the "gestation of a llama"? Because it SHOULD!

Posted 5:32 PM by Gene

Also in professional college football, the sponsor of the Allstate National Championship Bowl is facing having its license revoked in Florida because it's put its good hands over its mouth.

Posted 5:29 PM by Gene

Elsewhere in professional college football, the titans that be are discussing a playoff, which will remove the football ever further from the academics, not to mention playing a few tricks of its own in the standings, no doubt.

Posted 5:26 PM by Gene

Professional college football now has its own seven-year version of the eighteen-minute gap.

(Via DetroitNews.com)

Posted 5:08 PM by Gene

Buried in Wall Street's debacle, GREAT news for free en-ter-prise:

The U.S. Supreme Court put new limits on shareholder suits against a company's banks and business partners in a ruling that may thwart efforts to recoup billions of dollars lost in frauds at Enron Corp. and HealthSouth Corp.

Even better news:

The case split the court along ideological lines. Justice Anthony Kennedy wrote the court's majority opinion, which Chief Justice John Roberts and Justices Samuel Alito, Antonin Scalia and Clarence Thomas joined.

Who'd have thought Nine-Finger Kennedy could grow?

Posted 3:03 PM by Gene

Amidst the continuing fallout from the Strange Saga of Couch Jumper, a tribute to a "great journalist":

Meanwhile, many in the entertainment press were aghast Monday when ABC’s Diane Sawyer failed to ask Katie Holmes a single question on “Good Morning America” about the book, the videos or any of the other controversies that have swirled around her nearly three-year relationship with Cruise.

Sawyer, who prides herself on being a great journalist, managed to elicit from Holmes only that she liked wearing pink during her pregnancy.

You don't suppose that was in the ground rules, would you, Rog?

Posted 1:59 PM by Gene

Chrysler LLC, the third-largest U.S. automaker, is shifting its television advertising dollars to live sports and the Internet and out of primetime programs as the Hollywood writers' strike heads into an 11th week.

The temporary move may become permanent, because primetime commercials don't have as much viewer impact they did a decade ago, marketing chief Deborah Wahl Meyer said yesterday in an interview at the Detroit auto show. Meanwhile, Chrysler is reaching buyers on car-enthusiast Web sites, she said.

The strike ``is changing the whole broadcast model,'' Meyer said. Unlike the last writers' walkout, in 1988, ``the biggest thing we've noticed about the strike is that nobody is talking about it,'' she added. [Emphasis added]

COMMON SENSE STRIKES AN ADVERTISER?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

(Via IWantMedia)

Posted 1:50 PM by Gene

Oprah Winfrey Getting Her Own TV Network

Isn't that a letdown after getting her own president?

Posted 1:25 PM by Gene

Oops! No iPhone this year, just movie rentals.

Is the Lord God Steve losing it?

Posted 11:10 AM by Gene

Boy I love that there fancy chain you're giving me, sheikh! Of course I can't keep it on accounta it would look bad, plus we got these laws -- you know about laws, sheikh -- but let me tell you, once I get out of that there Beltway, why, pile on all the gold and diamonds and jewelry and what not you have! As my dad said, get while the gettin's good -- and sheikh, I intend to get!

Posted 9:49 AM by Gene

Saudi Arabia Rebuffs Bush on Oil Request

Well that's all right, Mr. High Holy Sheikh, once I get out of the Great White Prison we'll have some really swell times together -- maybe I can even work for you! Y'know, Texas and Saudi Arabia have lots in common...like great leaders.

Posted 9:46 AM by Gene

UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE YEAR IN MEDIA FAIRY-LAND:

The least important characteristics in a sales rep identified by marketers were sales presence and entertainment. Only 8% of respondents said going to dinners, shows and sporting events with sellers was important -- though Mr. Pearl warned survey respondents may have been reluctant to admit to that. "Most people probably aren't going to own up to the fact that they really love being entertained," he said.

ESPECIALLY ON OUR DIME.

Posted 8:46 AM by Gene

Clinton-Obama!

Er, Obama-Clinton!

I've got a great slogan: Three Presidents for the Price of One!

Oops! Somebody didn't call off the armies! (Via USAOKAY.com)

Posted 8:32 AM by Gene

The latest casualty in the Civil War of Entertainment: dozens of contracts worth millions!

TRANSLATION: The strike provides a convenient excuse for the moguls to ditch deals they shouldn't have made in the first place.

(Via MediaBistro)

Posted 8:27 AM by Gene

A man gets more prison time killing trees than some would killing people. We know this isn't a PC sentence -- indeed the man sounds like at least a borderline nut case -- but somehow we can see the day when killing trees becomes a capital offense, for whatever screwy reason.

And really, given the boxes going up in Vegas, is it that great a view?

Posted 8:16 AM by Gene

Paulson Confirms Alan Greenspan To Join Advisory Board

TRANSLATION: They pay him eight digits to belch platitudes.

Posted 7:57 PM by Gene

If your shopping cart suddenly develops a mind of its own -- blame the BUGMEISTERS!

Posted 7:12 PM by Gene

Con-SER-va-tives had better come up with a good excuse for this one: The Washington Times has hired a new executive editor -- from the WaPost!

Does this mean it's growing?

Posted 7:05 PM by Gene

Had people known in 1997 what they know now about Princess Di there might have been fewer flowers.

Posted 4:50 PM by Gene

Now the Civil War of Entertainment threatens the Grammys!

Today the Grammys, tomorrow -- the WORLD!

Posted 1:36 PM by Gene

In the "be-careful-what-you-wish-for" category:

TYLER – A 5,500-square-foot lakefront home awarded in the Home & Garden Television "Dream Home" sweepstakes in 2005 has sold at auction for $1.3 million.

Rick Mullins of Dallas won the one-acre property on Lake Tyler after bidding began Saturday at $5 million. The tax-assessed value of the home is $1.85 million, according to city records.

The original winner of the house, Don Cruz, said he put the home up for auction after he couldn't keep up with steep income and property taxes. Many other "Dream Home" winners in previous years have also been forced to sell their prize because of the financial burdens of the lavish properties.

Posted 1:26 PM by Gene

Bush visits Saudi Arabia, delivers $20 billion arms deal

If we GOT as good as we GAVE....

Posted 1:19 PM by Gene

The question is not if municipal social-services agencies are incompetent, but just how incompetent they must get before the citizens stage a rebellion.

Posted 12:52 PM by Gene

Seeing poor T. O. cry is almost enough to make a grown man cry.

Dry those tears, T. O. There's always next year -- and more chances to open your mouth.

Posted 9:10 AM by Gene

Now it's $24 billion in writedowns AND a dividend cut for Citigroup.

Is this an excuse to let oil sheikhs take over our banking system?

Posted 8:57 AM by Gene

And on the following page (thanks to a MediaBistro link), the Universe's Greatest Edi-TOR -- thinks:

What's on David Remnick's mind these days? In a video interview with Big Think, a Web start-up that marries high-profile interviews with social networking, The New Yorker editor in chief reflects on his childhood, his big breaks at The Washington Post and in Russia, and discusses the future of The New Yorker and of journalism in general. But he also admits he worries about whether The New Yorker is funny enough.

I'd say with Ken Felatta, Bert Lahrson and David "The Formerly Speculatively Investing Formerly Audiophilic Former Porn Addict" Denby you needn't worry about laughs.

Posted 8:54 AM by Gene

"The most important thing is to get that 'A' position."

ON THE FIFTY-YARD LINE!!!!!

I know, I know, I'm ranting this morning, but these jerks get me so riled up.



Really, aren't there more interesting things to watch than football?

Posted 8:43 AM by Gene

Surprise: JFK and Hill are debating how many scuzzy accusations of racism can fit on the head of a pin.

Posted 8:31 AM by Gene

And Ron Grover, who has been shaken to his core (and his potential fortune) by this dread tragedy, brings forth a savior for a war-wounded world -- THE LORD GOD STEVE!

Posted 8:19 AM by Gene

That practically every American news hack is in deep mourning over what happened to the Golden Globs is testimony to their incompetence. News hacks are central to the universe, and show-biz is central to theirs. Media are always right, and any action that damages media damages news hacks. The Globs were an innocent victim of a Civil War of entertainment that has claimed countless casualties (not least the junk TV the ad-blurbists increasingly rave over), and where Lincoln sought guidance through God, the hacks seek guidance through their gods; fondly do they hope, fervently do they pray, that this mighty scourge of war may speedily pass away, beseeching the SUMNERS and SLIMES and other of their noble heroes to finally come to their senses and give the @#$%&* writers (and we mean that literally, given their output) the $150 MILLION, and thus bequeath GENIUS to MANKIND again.

"Let us have PEACE!" said NIKKI FIN -- Gen. Grant. Well, except for the idiot advertisers who will waste our money until the last star has burnt to a cinder, we have peace on television. May it reign for months and months to come.

Posted 8:04 AM by Gene

I always harp on how advertisers waste our money -- first off because it is OUR money, just as taxes are our money, and because BIGMEDIA represent at least as much government as government, given how many are in their thrall -- but it is clear nothing will stop these clowns from wasting it. At an alleged "low $900,000s" a thirty what do these idiots get for their money financing SLIME? There are so many layers of management between the schmoozers of MadAve and the CEO that hardly anybody knows, and Corporate America wastes so much money on its trinkets hardly anybody need know; what's more the CEO can always be easily led into spending any amount so his whole executive council can schmooze; you never know when it might come in handy at the golf course. And to annoying deathly repetition I say it's about schmoozing because it's not about selling; the sales message is entirely lost in the expense and in the compulsion to schmooze, and when someone is pert enough to emphasize the sales pitch it's either something annoying or counterproductive.

I HATE BIGMEDIA! I HATE CORPORATE AMERICA!

Posted 8:47 PM by Gene

Three other things about Honorary President Mike that would appeal to the press: he's the sort who projects his failings on others, more so if they don't deserve it; he'd pinch pennies on others while lavishly favoring himself; and he'd boast of his "managerial excellence" in equal measure to all the holes he'd blow in the budget.

Posted 7:51 PM by Gene

Yesterday both NFL-playoff home teams won. Today both NFL-playoff home teams lost. Is this just a coincidence? This does seem to have happened before.

Posted 7:37 PM by Gene

An exceptionally acclaimed author and inspirer of a potential Os-CAR® nominee is annoyed:

Do you read any online reviews?

I don't read the blogs much. I don't like the tone-the rather in-your-face road-rage quality of a lot of exchange on the Internet. I don't like the threads that come out of any given piece of journalism. It seems that when people know they can't be held accountable, when they don't have eye contact, it seems to bring out a rather nasty, truculent, aggressive edge that I think slightly doesn't belong in the world of book reviewing.

And here is why, for all the hand-wringing and gnashing of fillings, the status quo in book reviewing will stand. Authors do not want to read negative reviews. Understandable; but frequently negative reviews are the only ones that will speak honestly. One reason we don't get more negative reviews is that no one wants to be the fellow who panned The Great Gatsby; but Great Gatsbys are exceedingly unlikely in this age, for reasons too tedious to rehash, and so we get lots of raves of lots of books that already have little distinction among them, getting less distinction still from the sound-alike raves. And we certainly don't want to upset exceptionally acclaimed authors. What the literary biz needs is a good shaking up, and a good weeding-out of its logrollers, but despite our exceptionally acclaimed author's annoyance it probably won't come from literary blogs, most of which are too obscure to matter, and whose proprietors also seem to believe they should be polite; but given our culture's increasing lack of confidence for all its blowhardness I would not want to guess where that shaking up and weeding out would come from.

And our potential-Os-CAR®-nominee inspirer's favorite Web site is something called Edge, which looks like the kind of hermetically-sealed thing that can only further serve to keep literature down.

P. S.

About The Life Transcripts:

"I just read the Life book and it is fantastic. One of the better books I've read in a while. Super rich, high signal to noise, great subject."
— Kevin Kelly, Editor-At-Large, Wired

Is this Julian Hirsch writing?

P. P. S. I should note Paramount Pete has complained yet again about all those gloomy Os-CAR® nominees, and this masterwork hasn't done that stupendously well at the B.O., so it appears Art must stay in her waiting room a little while longer.

(First link via the sometimes hermetically sealed Arts & Letters Daily)

Posted 5:17 PM by Gene

``The time has come to bridge the growing divide between Main Street and Wall Street,'' Obama, an Illinois senator, said in a statement. ``We can't wait for the next president to act.''

Okay JFK, we'll build a bridge that probably won't reach a tenth of the way to the other side, thus becoming a bridge to nowhere. "A $250 tax cut." Make -- me laugh! You know and I know the only way we'll get out of this mess is when all those zillions of unsold homes get sold, or demolished, and all the crushing bad debt that built them gets wiped off the books for good.

Terrific leadership, J.

Posted 4:45 PM by Gene

If it's Sunday, it must be The Big Double-A Scribble:

1. Victoria's Secret's execs think they can flog their housing-depressed sales by yelling, "I WAS AT THE SUPER BOWL® AND YOU WEREN'T!" If that could be true not only should every national retailer be a nuisance there, it would end our sure-to-be near-depression.

2. Chrysler's calling itself NEW! -- again:

This marks the third time since the late 1970s that the carmaker has advertised itself as "the new Chrysler," according to Todd Turner, president of consultant CarConcepts. "If it was only a perception problem, they could fix it with communications, and even so, that takes a lot of time and money."

Which is surely a problem as many believe the Three-Headed Dog wants to save money on its investment. How it can save money and get back in the race remains to be seen.

3. The only people more upset than the ad-blurbists and other assorted résumé-writing news hacks who want their TV back are the madmen of MadAve, who live to hear their clients scream, "I WAS AT THE OSCARS® AND YOU WEREN'T!" Given how many uncounted zillions they've flushed down the boob tube they would be psychotically upset, as financing all manner of dog droppings allows them to put a non-stop one over on us. But the CW says the last time there was a big Fantasy and Profanity League strike the ratings dropped, and a public already slowly weaned from the set as it is may not have the patience of, say, media buyers.

4. This housing-inspired near-depression is forcing ordinary folk to discover private labels -- and once they discover most private-label goods are just as good -- indeed, many are made by members of THE AMERICAN SOCIETY OF WILLFULLY IGNORANT ADVERTISERS -- they may not want to trade back up.

5. If Wendy's wants to be Mickey D, it should hire a CMO (that's chief marketing officer, about analogous to a chief information officer, and just as useful) whose chief function is to yell "HIP." That and maybe it could sell overpriced java.

Posted 2:34 PM by Gene

Nineteen months after yours truly declared it "a high-tech squeeze box that grew up", a P-Ulitzer-Prize-winning AH-chi-tect-TYURE cri-TIC calls the Hearst Tower UG-LEH!

I'm tired of being blogging's best-kept secret!

(Via ADAM!!!!!)

Posted 2:09 PM by Gene

While we are sorry to hear Mr. Matsushita's being taken off the masthead at -- Panasonic Corp.? -- the flip side is in time people will forget who BUGMEISTER BILL was.

Posted 1:36 PM by Gene

Celebrities Donate to Many Candidates

Jennifer Aniston

-$2,300 to Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama

Hank Azaria

-$2,300 to Democratic presidential candidate John Edwards

Tyra Banks

-$2,300 contribution to Obama

Angela Bassett

-$2,300 to Obama

Halle Berry

$2,300 to Obama

Valerie Bertinelli

-$2,300 to Obama

Pat Boone

-$800 to former Republican presidential candidate Sam Brownback

-$1,000 to Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney

Zach Braff

-$2,300 to Obama

Christie Brinkley

-$2,150 to Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton

-$1,000 to Obama

James L. Brooks

-$2,300 to Obama

-$2,300 to Edwards

-$2,300 to Clinton

-$1,000 to former Democratic presidential candidate Bill Richardson

Jackson Browne

$2,300 to Obama

Jerry Bruckheimer

-$2,300 to Republican presidential candidate John McCain [BOOBS McKEATING! THIS MAKES YOU POPULAR!!!!!]

Chevy Chase

-$2,100 to former Democratic presidential candidate Chris Dodd

-$4,600 to Clinton

Cher

-$2,100 to former Democratic presidential candidate Joe Biden

John Cleese

-$2,300 to Obama

George Clooney

-$2,300 to Obama

Harry Connick Jr.

-$4,600 to Obama

Gary Cole

-$2,300 to Edwards

Larry David

-$2,300 to Edwards

-$2,300 to Obama

James Denton

-$4,600 to Edwards

Danny DeVito

-$2,300 to Clinton

Paul Dooley

-$2,300 to Obama

Michael Douglas

-$4,600 to Clinton

-$4,600 to Richardson

-$1,500 to Democratic presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich

-$4,600 to Dodd

-$4,600 to Obama [Playing the field, Mike? We thought you were MARRIED.]

Fran Drescher

-$2,300 to Clinton

Hector Elizondo

-$300 to Kucinich

Linda Evans

-$2,300 to Obama

Morgan Freeman

-$2,300 to Obama

Jamie Foxx

-$2,300 to Obama

Jeff Garlin

-$250 to Obama

Louis Gossett

-$2,300 to Obama

Kelsey Grammer

-$2,300 to Republican presidential candidate Rudy Giuliani

Seth Green

-$4,600 to Edwards

Jasmine Guy

-$2,300 to Obama

Tom Hanks

-$2,300 to Clinton

-$2,300 to Obama

Hill Harper

-$2,300 to Obama

Dennis Haysbert

-$2,300 to Obama

Edward Helms

-$250 to Clinton

Don Henley

-$4,600 to Edwards

-$4,600 to Clinton

Cheryl Hines

-$1,000 to Obama

Quincy Jones

-$4,600 to Clinton

Jeffrey Katzenberg

-$2,300 to Clinton

-$2,300 to Obama

-$2,100 to Edwards

-$2,300 to Dodd

Val Kilmer

-$2,300 to Richardson

Norman Lear

-$2,300 to Clinton

-$2,100 to former Democratic presidential candidate Tom Vilsack

-$1,150 to Richardson

-$2,300 to Edwards

-$2,300 to Obama

John Lithgow

-$1,000 to Dodd

Seth Macfarlane

-$1,000 to Obama

Amy Madigan

-$2,300 to Clinton

Tobey Maguire

-$4,600 to Clinton

-$2,300 to Obama

Branford Marsalis

-$4,600 to Obama

Steve Martin

-$2,300 to Dodd

Lorne Michaels

-$4,600 to Dodd

-$2,300 to McCain [MR. SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE LIKES YOU TOO!]

Bette Midler

-$4,600 to Richardson

-$2,300 to Clinton

-$2,300 to Obama

Eddie Murphy

-$2,300 to Obama

Kathy Najimy

-$2,300 to Clinton

Paul Newman

-$4,600 to Obama

-$4,600 to Clinton

-$2,300 to Richardson

-$4,600 to Dodd

Leonard Nimoy

-$2,300 to Obama

Edward Norton

-$2,300 to Obama

Rosie O'Donnell

-$2,300 to Clinton

-$2,300 to Obama

-$2,300 to Richardson

-$2,300 to Edwards

Sean Penn

-$2,300 to Kucinich

-$4,600 to Edwards

Rhea Perlman

-$2,300 to Clinton

Ellen Pompeo

-$4,600 to Obama

Sidney Poitier

-$4,600 to Obama

Bonnie Raitt

-$2,300 to Edwards

-$2,300 to Kucinich

Lynn Redgrave

-$250 to Clinton

Rob Reiner

-$2,300 to Clinton

-$2,300 to Richardson

-$2,300 to Edwards

-$1,000 to Dodd

Chris Rock

-$4,600 to Obama

Susan Saint James

-$4,600 to Dodd

Adam Sandler

-$2,100 to Giuliani

Brooke Shields

-$2,300 to Obama

Elisabeth Shue

-$1,500 to Dodd

Paul Simon

-$4,600 to Dodd

Will Smith

-$4,600 to Obama

Steven Spielberg

-$2,300 to Clinton

-$2,300 to Richardson

-$2,300 to Edwards

-$2,300 to Obama

Darren Star

-$2,300 to Edwards

-$2,300 to Obama

Mary Steenburgen

-$2,300 to Edwards

-$4,600 to Clinton

Ben Stein

-$750 to Giuliani [BEN FRANKENSTEIN GAVE TO A REPUBLICAN?!?!?]

Ben Stiller

-$2,300 to Edwards

-$2,300 to Obama

-$4,600 to Clinton

Barbra Streisand

-$1,000 to Dodd

-$2,300 to Clinton

-$2,300 to Edwards

-$2,300 to Obama

Isaiah Washington

$2,300 to Obama

Gene Wilder

-$2,300 to Obama

Jerry Weintraub

-$2,300 to Richardson

Forest Whitaker

-$2,300 to Obama

Oprah Winfrey

-$2,300 to Obama

Joanne Woodward

-$4,600 to Clinton

-$4,600 to Dodd

-$4,600 to Obama

Renee Zellweger

-$4,600 to Clinton

---

Source: Federal Election Commission data.

[Emphasis added]



And so on. And so on and so on. And so on and so on and so on.

(List copied from ASSPress post)

P. S.

GOP candidate Mike Huckabee has the support of actor Chuck Norris — but none of his money, as of the latest campaign filings.

Well Hucklechuck, he gave you publicity -- and you can't BUY that.

Pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft!

Posted 11:54 AM by Gene

NEWSWEEK: Cover: Hillary Clinton: 'I Found my own Voice.' [SIC]

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!

Posted 11:45 AM by Gene

But not everyone is suffering in this -- new economy: ESPNCORP's shares are down, but Ub Iger's pay is WAY UP!

Rumble rumble rumble, mutiny mutiny mutiny.

Posted 11:42 AM by Gene

When Maryland's governor has become unpopular for raising taxes, he has a problem.

Posted 11:36 AM by Gene

TRANSLATION: EMI's about to implode.

This and the continuing disaster at JUNIOR's plaything are the direct result of treating your customers as criminals, and especially from treating your customers' ears as stopped up.

Posted 11:25 AM by Gene

Our economy is prone to bubbles? We thought the Wizard of Oz took care of that!