THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
Blogroll Me!
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Wednesday, February 07, 2007
NBC's Russert Takes Stand
"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?"
"I AM the truth!"
"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?"
"I AM the truth!"
I find stories on child porn to be extremely exasperating because it's the last taboo, because the hacks helped make it the last taboo, because there's little to prevent them from making it non-taboo (HIP, anyone?), because they allow them to indulge in fake populism for a cause that would merit their superior Mencken-to-the-yahoos snickering if it were something else, and because this well-practiced hand-wringing will not protect one child so long as we turn the other cheek at the taboos that aren't.
The artistic hacks whose principal aim these days is to dream up blueprints of eyesores and hope DONALDs stamp their names on the penthouses with gold leaf have issued an idiotic PR-poll (90% of parents LOVE movie ratings! Britney is the WORST dog owner!) in which the PEE-pul rate their favorite buildings. This is social-science quackery again playing mischief with our taste. Some of the choices are unimpeachable: the Lincoln Memorial, The Golden Gate Bridge, the Chrysler Building; some of it is match the building with the picture (are the White House and the Washington Monument that great?), some of it is name-dropping (how many people are truly aware of Fallingwater and Taliesin, Frank Lloyd Wright's masterpieces?), some of it is uneducation (Lever House among others is conspicuously missing) and some of it is sheer stupidity -- the RELIANT Astrodome? Wanamaker's [SIC!!!!!] Department Store in Philadelphia? The BELLAGIO?!? THE WORLD TRADE CENTER?!?!? Oh, so the hacks' organization is celebrating a birthday. Why did it have to blow out the candles so hard it got the icing all over us?
Meantime the virus of Dobbsitis (or should that be MoneyHoney®itis?) has spread to political reporting, where someone named Chuck must use business jargon to compare the Presidential candidates' chances. Chuck, it's still twenty months away, you don't know, I don't know, and still you and your friends will typetypetype your ignorance to no end.
Bruce has written a Harvard Business School case study in why so much of business reporting is worthless: it's an attempt to make a trend more than to report it, and to pat the trend's creators on the back for a job well done for merely creating a trend. So much of business reporting has been the pat on the back -- what imprisoned super-CEO was without it? Moreover it meshes well with the hacks' overbearing desire to be pop-cultural arbiters, and to use the word HIP to the point of supreme annoyance with its consumers -- hey, but who are they? They merely hit up our Web pages.
A NEUHARTHISM OF THE MONTH AWARD TO BRUCE!
A NEUHARTHISM OF THE MONTH AWARD TO BRUCE!
"GE WANTS OUT"!!!!!
This is the guy who said EINSTEIN would be canceled. Keep in mind, though, Little Jeffy has seen his stock go nowhere since he took over from THE LEGEND. Keep further in mind, a big company in big media in a big way has big PR problems. I still say if GE BANCORP AND REALTY were out of entertainment many outside business would regard it better -- not that that's saying much.
You wonder -- would Little Jeffy entertain offers of breaking up the Kingdom of Fairfield? As we asked before, what is GE BANCORP AND REALTY'S point anyway, other than bigness?
P. S. Hmmm -- DA POST!!!!!!!!!! is pitching this too. Is SLIME preparing a BID?
This is the guy who said EINSTEIN would be canceled. Keep in mind, though, Little Jeffy has seen his stock go nowhere since he took over from THE LEGEND. Keep further in mind, a big company in big media in a big way has big PR problems. I still say if GE BANCORP AND REALTY were out of entertainment many outside business would regard it better -- not that that's saying much.
You wonder -- would Little Jeffy entertain offers of breaking up the Kingdom of Fairfield? As we asked before, what is GE BANCORP AND REALTY'S point anyway, other than bigness?
P. S. Hmmm -- DA POST!!!!!!!!!! is pitching this too. Is SLIME preparing a BID?
In a state-of-the-industry report released in Washington Tuesday, the Motion Picture Association of America said that movie and TV businesses were responsible for contributing $60.46 billion!!!!! to the country's economy and that they were responsible for generating 1.3 million jobs!!!!! in 2005. Speaking to an MPAA symposium, MPAA Chairman Dan Glickman!!!!! said, "The creative output of the American motion picture and television industry is widely appreciated around the world, yet its contribution to the nation's economy is seldom recognized. This report ... confirms the importance of filmed entertainment production to America's economy!!!!!!!!!!" [Obvious copy-from-a-press-release overemphasis added!!!!!!!!!!]
That's 0.485 PERCENT of our 2005 GDP, and 0.9 PERCENT of our January, 2007 workforce (and that figure probably includes the Reverse Robin Hoods and a lot of customer-service types and technicians in the CABLE CONSPIRACY, not to mention the teenage slobs, er, ushers who let the floors of the popcorn restaurants accrete with Coke). You're not THAT important, SAMMY GLICKMAN -- except for the way you can HECTOR US.
That's 0.485 PERCENT of our 2005 GDP, and 0.9 PERCENT of our January, 2007 workforce (and that figure probably includes the Reverse Robin Hoods and a lot of customer-service types and technicians in the CABLE CONSPIRACY, not to mention the teenage slobs, er, ushers who let the floors of the popcorn restaurants accrete with Coke). You're not THAT important, SAMMY GLICKMAN -- except for the way you can HECTOR US.
Guess it's back to two hits a day. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANYBODY OUT THERE?
AMADOU DIALLO DISQUALIFIES RUDY!
Jeez -- you'd think this show of temper might disqualify Hair-Scratcher.
Jeez -- you'd think this show of temper might disqualify Hair-Scratcher.
Here's the next big deal among Beltway onanists: Air Pelosi. NANCY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! will obviously use it as the Opposition President, and for fundraising. That Dubya will probably let it go untouched is another example of how enfeebled he is.
The congressional source said Pentagon officials complained that Mr. Murtha, Pennsylvania Democrat, is accusing them of sexism for not immediately heeding her request.
Megan E. Grote, Mr. Murtha's press secretary, said, "Mr. Murtha absolutely never said anything about being 'sexist.' We have no further comment."
TRANSLATION: SEXIST!
P. S. Official Republican spokespoops (yes, that includes YOU, MS. TRAVERS) are using this to make partisan fun of NANCY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SIX OF ONE....
The congressional source said Pentagon officials complained that Mr. Murtha, Pennsylvania Democrat, is accusing them of sexism for not immediately heeding her request.
Megan E. Grote, Mr. Murtha's press secretary, said, "Mr. Murtha absolutely never said anything about being 'sexist.' We have no further comment."
TRANSLATION: SEXIST!
P. S. Official Republican spokespoops (yes, that includes YOU, MS. TRAVERS) are using this to make partisan fun of NANCY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SIX OF ONE....
An OUTRAGED LEFT, er PROGRESSIVE MOVEMENT wants JO-NAH TO PAY FOR HIS WRONG PREDICTION ABOUT THE WORST WAR IN HISTORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay, he should pay -- when the Fighting Man for the Little Guy sells his several not-so-little homes. MILLIONAIRES AND BUMS -- AND MILLIONAIRE BUMS....
[I]T'S TIME TO HOLD MEDIA CORPORATIONS LIKE TRIBUNE RESPONSIBLE FOR ELEVATING THE GOLDBERGS AND THEIR RECKLESS PREDICTIONS -- AS THEY STRANGLE NEWSPAPERS AND SILENCE SERIOUS JOURNALISTS LIKE BOB SCHEER!!!!!!!!!! [Righteous overemphasis added]
YOU HAVE YOUR JO-NAHS TOO.
(Via the usual ROMY, who's MAD!)
Okay, he should pay -- when the Fighting Man for the Little Guy sells his several not-so-little homes. MILLIONAIRES AND BUMS -- AND MILLIONAIRE BUMS....
[I]T'S TIME TO HOLD MEDIA CORPORATIONS LIKE TRIBUNE RESPONSIBLE FOR ELEVATING THE GOLDBERGS AND THEIR RECKLESS PREDICTIONS -- AS THEY STRANGLE NEWSPAPERS AND SILENCE SERIOUS JOURNALISTS LIKE BOB SCHEER!!!!!!!!!! [Righteous overemphasis added]
YOU HAVE YOUR JO-NAHS TOO.
(Via the usual ROMY, who's MAD!)
What are the odds the Feds will go after these clowns for deceptive advertising?
On the other hand, it's our kind of deceptive advertising.
GOP Views Clinton As Virtually Unbeatable
Tenth graf:
The comments are striking at several levels. The flagging conservative morale about beating Clinton comes at the same time many Democrats regard the New York senator as newly vulnerable because of the competition she faces from Illinois Sen. Barack Obama and skepticism she faces from activists opposed to the Iraq war. On the Republican side, there is a disconnect between grass-roots, red-state Republicans and the mostly Washington-based operatives who surround Bush.
C'mon idiots, it's twenty months until the election. Let the PEOPLE decide, for once.
That said, the Republicans can only blame themselves with their DUBYAS and DUKES.
Tenth graf:
The comments are striking at several levels. The flagging conservative morale about beating Clinton comes at the same time many Democrats regard the New York senator as newly vulnerable because of the competition she faces from Illinois Sen. Barack Obama and skepticism she faces from activists opposed to the Iraq war. On the Republican side, there is a disconnect between grass-roots, red-state Republicans and the mostly Washington-based operatives who surround Bush.
C'mon idiots, it's twenty months until the election. Let the PEOPLE decide, for once.
That said, the Republicans can only blame themselves with their DUBYAS and DUKES.
Times May Have Changed,
But Oscars Still Suspenseful
Suspenseful! We're sitting at the edge of the rear of our seat, Andrew, busily filing our fingernails, wondering which of five arthouse properties (well four; Mr. Taxi Driver's is an HONORARY arthouse flick) will take home the coveted ACADEMY AWARD®, to do a few more millions of biz at the popcorn restaurants, and then rest in eternal slumber in the back catalog. Oh yes, Mr. Sarris, we're trembling with excitement -- at the thought that once again we can miss the Os-CARS®.
This has to be one of the most lunkheaded heds ever in The Cute Little Pink Paper. We would think Mr. Sarris is old enough to know better -- but then again, he's a MOVIE AD-BLURBIST.
But Oscars Still Suspenseful
Suspenseful! We're sitting at the edge of the rear of our seat, Andrew, busily filing our fingernails, wondering which of five arthouse properties (well four; Mr. Taxi Driver's is an HONORARY arthouse flick) will take home the coveted ACADEMY AWARD®, to do a few more millions of biz at the popcorn restaurants, and then rest in eternal slumber in the back catalog. Oh yes, Mr. Sarris, we're trembling with excitement -- at the thought that once again we can miss the Os-CARS®.
This has to be one of the most lunkheaded heds ever in The Cute Little Pink Paper. We would think Mr. Sarris is old enough to know better -- but then again, he's a MOVIE AD-BLURBIST.
We have not commented on that sorrowful astronaut ménage-à-trois because there's little to say that isn't Ellen Goodman-platitudinizing. Oh yes, we could speak of how astronauts used to be noble heroes, but that pretty well ended when John Glenn entered the Senate, and NASA's always had it's Hi Mom! moments, even before the Orbiting Jalopy and its disasters. (Indeed, NASA's existence was predicated upon the greatest of Hi Mom! moments, between ourselves and the Soviet Union.) We could say this shows astronauts are only human, which is stupid as they've been human for quite a while. No, the only thing to say is for those who find adultery funny, the joke's on them.
In other musical news we see the CHILD MOLESTER MISTUH GLITTUH has gotten his sentence reduced thanks to "a nationwide Lunar New Year prison amnesty", which somehow seems fitting.
In fifty years idiots will still play HIS HOOK in arenas. Well, you know, Cole Porter blahblahblah....First, Cole Porter didn't bugger kids, and second, he didn't write for arenas.
By the way, we see the hacks are ignoring Mr. Laine's death. Don't worry -- when WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE DYLAN GOES the month-long period of state-media mourning will be so intense it will make people SCREAM -- provided there's still a news biz.
In fifty years idiots will still play HIS HOOK in arenas. Well, you know, Cole Porter blahblahblah....First, Cole Porter didn't bugger kids, and second, he didn't write for arenas.
By the way, we see the hacks are ignoring Mr. Laine's death. Don't worry -- when WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE DYLAN GOES the month-long period of state-media mourning will be so intense it will make people SCREAM -- provided there's still a news biz.
THE FELLOW WHO SANG "BLAZING SADDLES" HAS DIED. Well, that's what the philistine news hacks will call Frankie Laine, and he showed poor judgment and taste in that (but hey! Do those things count anymore? Hell, with the hacks that's ten bonus points!), yet in everything else he got it right. Yes, he was an emotional singer, and he wore that emotion on his sleeve, but he was a force, a fiery singer, a singer with guts. Say what you will about the guy's style, he had conviction. The fact that he sang the treacle beloved of A&R boys like the notorious Mitch Miller and became unremovably intertwined with that "YEEEEEE-HAAAAAAAH!" joke will not negate that. Listen to Rockin', a Columbia jazz album of the mid-50s, and you know you're in the presence of a musician of the first rank. He was also from all accounts a gentleman, and helped in his own small way in the fight for civil rights. Thankfully these days (as we say too often) we have MASTERWORKS now, and we can forget about these mere singers.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
This story raises a question: will the hacks play the R card -- religion -- when the going gets tough for their candidate? It never ceases to amaze me how the same hacks who go into a hellfire fury over the word "evangelical" go soft and mushy when a friend needs help. Hill seems to share Sen. Hein-TZZZ' position, going for a religion of platitudes, of social responsibility, of nonjudgmentalism (strange especially for woman who was on the throes of judgmentalism), and though maybe perhaps possibly we don't know if there's a God, just in case, capitalize it.
AP NEWS ALERT!!!!!
WASHINGTON (AP) -- Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke says bolstering education - not erecting trade barriers - should help deal with economic inequality in the United States.
WASHINGTON (AP) -- Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke says bolstering education - not erecting trade barriers - should help deal with economic inequality in the United States.
Adviser: Romney will announce formal White House run next week
Okay, Mitt -- NOW's the time to make up your mind!
Okay, Mitt -- NOW's the time to make up your mind!
The New Yorker's jazz critic Whitney Balliett has died. This is noteworthy because his career went back to the age when William Shawn edited it in a hermetically-sealed cocoon, and when James Thurber was throwing his tantrums, and E. B. White stopped to smell the flowers on his farm. His obit was written by MOZZARELLA, who can only remind us just why the magazine isn't worth reading anymore.
(Via ArtsJournal)
(Via ArtsJournal)
Count us surprised:
The bomb hoax bozos whose light-up devices sparked a Boston terror panic were caught on camera standing with spectators and filming the massive police response, the Herald has learned.
Just think: if the authorities weren't so ARE-SQUAY, they'd have gotten a 10,000-word profile in ADAGE!!!!!
The bomb hoax bozos whose light-up devices sparked a Boston terror panic were caught on camera standing with spectators and filming the massive police response, the Herald has learned.
Just think: if the authorities weren't so ARE-SQUAY, they'd have gotten a 10,000-word profile in ADAGE!!!!!
Why Be a Conservative Libertarian?
Why, indeed?
I find it a challenge trying to persuade religious conservatives to loosen the relationship between their religious beliefs and their political agenda. However, I find it even more of a challenge to deal with the Left, where their political agenda is their religion.
And isn't AYN RAND the GLIBERTARIAN'S GOD, and Her Works the BIBLE?
Why, indeed?
I find it a challenge trying to persuade religious conservatives to loosen the relationship between their religious beliefs and their political agenda. However, I find it even more of a challenge to deal with the Left, where their political agenda is their religion.
And isn't AYN RAND the GLIBERTARIAN'S GOD, and Her Works the BIBLE?
Count on our favorite press agent Rog to get to the heart of the matter: the settlement between Apple and Apple allowed two sets of greedmeisters who vastly overcharge for their product to continue overcharging.
Yet more all-the-news-you-need-to-know news from the ASSPress:
Paris Hilton Gets Ticket to Vienna Ball
What happened to all the promised exposes on our perfidy in the War on Militancy? C'mon, CURLEY! [Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!] Where's your sense of humor?
Paris Hilton Gets Ticket to Vienna Ball
What happened to all the promised exposes on our perfidy in the War on Militancy? C'mon, CURLEY! [Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!] Where's your sense of humor?
And in yet more Stars-and-Stripes-Forever-inspiring flag-waving about our dollars-and-cents supremacy:
McClatchy's in a revenue slump that began last summer
Last summer -- that was when...no. NO. It COULDN'T be. Gosh almighty!
McClatchy's in a revenue slump that began last summer
Last summer -- that was when...no. NO. It COULDN'T be. Gosh almighty!
And in still more patriotic news of our great nation's economic strength:
Microsoft has increased the price of telephone support for users of its Windows XP operating system and Office XP productivity applications. The changes were quietly coincident with last week's high-profile introductions of the company's new Windows Vista operating system and Office 2007 suite.
According to information posted on Microsoft's Web site, the per-incident support cost for all Windows users is now $59. Prior to January 30th, when Microsoft released the retail version of Vista, the support cost for users of Windows XP and older versions of the operating system was $39 per incident. That represents a price increase of 51%.
Similarly, phone support for Office users prior to the launch of Office 2007 -- which also debuted January 30 -- was $35.00 per incident. The price is now $49 per incident, or 40% higher, regardless of version.
Microsoft's explanation for the new plan will be more familiar to economics professors than computer users. "To more accurately reflect the value of and Microsoft's investment in the service, support incident pricing for Microsoft consumers has been designed through an analysis of competitive offerings and in reference to GDP per capita," said Microsoft, in a statement.
TRANSLATION: WE'RE A MONOPOLY. DEAL WITH IT.
Microsoft has increased the price of telephone support for users of its Windows XP operating system and Office XP productivity applications. The changes were quietly coincident with last week's high-profile introductions of the company's new Windows Vista operating system and Office 2007 suite.
According to information posted on Microsoft's Web site, the per-incident support cost for all Windows users is now $59. Prior to January 30th, when Microsoft released the retail version of Vista, the support cost for users of Windows XP and older versions of the operating system was $39 per incident. That represents a price increase of 51%.
Similarly, phone support for Office users prior to the launch of Office 2007 -- which also debuted January 30 -- was $35.00 per incident. The price is now $49 per incident, or 40% higher, regardless of version.
Microsoft's explanation for the new plan will be more familiar to economics professors than computer users. "To more accurately reflect the value of and Microsoft's investment in the service, support incident pricing for Microsoft consumers has been designed through an analysis of competitive offerings and in reference to GDP per capita," said Microsoft, in a statement.
TRANSLATION: WE'RE A MONOPOLY. DEAL WITH IT.
And in other news of Modern America's Business Might, SAMMY GLICKMAN and the GREATEST INDUSTRY KNOWN TO MAN are about to administer to our Congresspoops the equivalent of a two-by-four to a mule. This is old-fashioned barnstorming lobbying at its worst: send in the first-string offensive squad and have them pummel their way to favorable treatment that hurts the rest of us. SAMMY is deaf, dumb and blind to the contempt in which many Americans hold his beloved trade, not least in several pocketbook issues, which with this two-by-four means a healthy dose of onerous DRM pushing. It may work with the lobbyist-puppets; it may not work with their putative masters, the VOTERS.
Here's another for-instance from the world's leading biznews rag: Kodak sounds as if it's come up with a neat new technology for printer ink. Problem is someone has to make the printers -- and that will probably be Hong Chong Printer Manufacturing Co. of China, just as Ching Chang Printer Company makes them for HP, and Ying Yong Technology Company makes them for Lexmark, and -- get the point? All we make is the ink, if that, and truth to tell there isn't much difference in computer printers. So how does a "struggling" firm like Kodak distinguish itself -- and how does it make fat profits? (Especially when the company intends to compete on price.) This is precisely why Motorola has struggled: anyone can make cell phones. The thing is why does it always have to be someone else?
You have to wonder if our auto biz' problems are signals of an inability to compete. We lead the world in shuffling assets and creating busywork and the technologies that foster busywork, but when it comes to essential industries it's as if we increasingly don't have a clue -- or a manufacturing base.
Monday, February 05, 2007
The TWXSTERS pay $2 million for all that valuable free publicity.
Another reason to grimace: the guerilla marketing IDIOTS of today are the KENNYBOYS of tomorrow.
Another reason to grimace: the guerilla marketing IDIOTS of today are the KENNYBOYS of tomorrow.
Do We Really Need a Fourth Hour of Today? (USAT) [MediaBistro link]
The common-sense answer: no. The Little Jeffy-Jeff Zuck-obsessive-compulsive-bean-counter-Reverse-Robin-Hood-money-wasting-TV-reporter-scribbling answer: YES!!!!!!!!!!
The common-sense answer: no. The Little Jeffy-Jeff Zuck-obsessive-compulsive-bean-counter-Reverse-Robin-Hood-money-wasting-TV-reporter-scribbling answer: YES!!!!!!!!!!
World without [SIC] America? [Iain Murray]
The crew at 18DoughtyStreet and BritainandAmerica.com are preparing to make a video ad about what the world would be like without America and are looking for input into the creative process. Click here for more details.
02/05 11:01 AM
We're not sure we should do that. The League of Nations has been working on it for years.
The crew at 18DoughtyStreet and BritainandAmerica.com are preparing to make a video ad about what the world would be like without America and are looking for input into the creative process. Click here for more details.
02/05 11:01 AM
We're not sure we should do that. The League of Nations has been working on it for years.
Dubya wants to THROW money at defense and EHDYUKAYSHUN...the Synthetic 'Do wants to THROW money at health care...what's with this sudden rush of pocket picking?
We find it hard to believe B. S. DEFENDER makes ONLY $1,000 a month from his typing. (This, of course, does not count the side benefits of all his schmoozing.) We do believe, however, that you have to have either media connections or a Type-A personality to make it big time in blogging, and that is something the Lord God failed to bequeath us.
"The conscience, I suspect, is a vital organ. And when it goes, you go."
That, we may be sure, does not just apply to modern Russia.
That, we may be sure, does not just apply to modern Russia.
What is so great about Bob Wright that LALA has gone into mourning over his departure?
These clowns are trying to paint this as an example of corporate "ageism." I say it's an example of a guy being an executive for over twenty years and finding himself in fourth place.
By the way, I'm not sure I'd list acquiring Financial News Network as an achievement.
These clowns are trying to paint this as an example of corporate "ageism." I say it's an example of a guy being an executive for over twenty years and finding himself in fourth place.
By the way, I'm not sure I'd list acquiring Financial News Network as an achievement.
AT PEOPLE WARNER...
In a sloppy, exciting, rainsoaked NFL title game.... [CNN.com home-page squib]
...the right hand doesn't know...
Boring. Poorly executed. Unmemorable.
...what the left hand is doing.
In a sloppy, exciting, rainsoaked NFL title game.... [CNN.com home-page squib]
...the right hand doesn't know...
Boring. Poorly executed. Unmemorable.
...what the left hand is doing.
Two ASSPress stories of note, nearly next to each other on the Mess's home page:
More children and teens are being exposed to online pornography, mostly by accidentally viewing sexually explicit Web sites while surfing the Internet, researchers say.
The next one points to a solution:
A Saudi Arabian judge sentenced 20 foreigners to receive lashes and spend several months in prison after convicting them of attending a party where alcohol was served and men and women danced, a newspaper reported Sunday.
I hear the vigorous oil-lubricated rubbing of hands....
More children and teens are being exposed to online pornography, mostly by accidentally viewing sexually explicit Web sites while surfing the Internet, researchers say.
The next one points to a solution:
A Saudi Arabian judge sentenced 20 foreigners to receive lashes and spend several months in prison after convicting them of attending a party where alcohol was served and men and women danced, a newspaper reported Sunday.
I hear the vigorous oil-lubricated rubbing of hands....
Sunday, February 04, 2007
‘Utopia’ Is a Bore. There, I Said It.
So why are so many people banging down the doors to be bored?
(First link via ArtsJournal)
So why are so many people banging down the doors to be bored?
(First link via ArtsJournal)
From the blog at SUMNER's Web site for THE GAME:
2nd Quarter - 10:08
There are things I don't believe ... and one of those things is Jim Nantz telling me about Black History Month.
How exciting is it? At the FREEP's live blog they seem to be talking more about the commercials. Do you think SOB NEUHARTH may have known something when he started hard-selling the ADS?
You have to wonder sometimes if the score matters.
P. S. Given the on-the-field antics I think we can predict what hundreds of CEOs will be saying the next five months: "I WAS AT THE SUPER BOWL -- IN A LUXURY BOX -- AND STAYED DRY -- AND YOU WEREN'T!!!!!"
2nd Quarter - 10:08
There are things I don't believe ... and one of those things is Jim Nantz telling me about Black History Month.
How exciting is it? At the FREEP's live blog they seem to be talking more about the commercials. Do you think SOB NEUHARTH may have known something when he started hard-selling the ADS?
You have to wonder sometimes if the score matters.
P. S. Given the on-the-field antics I think we can predict what hundreds of CEOs will be saying the next five months: "I WAS AT THE SUPER BOWL -- IN A LUXURY BOX -- AND STAYED DRY -- AND YOU WEREN'T!!!!!"
The Peter Principle, defined:
Jeff Zucker to take top spot at NBC Universal
"Bob was a brilliant strategist who really built the company into what it is today," said a senior NBC Universal executive. "But now you need an operator, a manager, someone to take it to the next level."
Going DOWN!
Jeff Zucker to take top spot at NBC Universal
"Bob was a brilliant strategist who really built the company into what it is today," said a senior NBC Universal executive. "But now you need an operator, a manager, someone to take it to the next level."
Going DOWN!
Iranian nuclear scientist ‘assassinated by Mossad’
This story we confess makes us nervous; the Israelis are doing what the Russians did to that spy-or-whatever. There is one crucial difference however; Belly-Kisser was out to silence dissent.
This story we confess makes us nervous; the Israelis are doing what the Russians did to that spy-or-whatever. There is one crucial difference however; Belly-Kisser was out to silence dissent.
Dubya compromises again, and yet another BAD day at AmSpec, and wherever True Believers congregate:
Bush puts 'ic' back in 'Democrat Party'
"Now look, my diction isn't all that good," Bush told the 200 lawmakers who wrapped up two days away from Washington with family and aides. "I have been accused of occasionally mangling the English language. And so I appreciate you inviting the head of the Republic Party."
That's all right, Dubya; we don't expect you politicians to know how to read.
Bush puts 'ic' back in 'Democrat Party'
"Now look, my diction isn't all that good," Bush told the 200 lawmakers who wrapped up two days away from Washington with family and aides. "I have been accused of occasionally mangling the English language. And so I appreciate you inviting the head of the Republic Party."
That's all right, Dubya; we don't expect you politicians to know how to read.
The Life of a Saint: or, the Life of One Whom We Wish Would Always Be Our Kind of Republican:
McCain’s Advisers Once Made Ads That Drew His Ire
McCain’s Advisers Once Made Ads That Drew His Ire
Saturday, February 03, 2007
NEWSRAG EDITING MADE E-Z: JonBoy has put the Britneyclones on the domestic cover (no .jpg yet, but that's the story), which gives us an excuse to be sensational and deny it at the same time. (I guess that's why we put it in the HEALTH section?) And what cover story is complete without the idiotic nonjudgmental closing graf?
And even if our adolescents pick up a few tricks from the Brit Pack, we have a big head start on them. We begin to teach our kids values while they're still in diapers. "Kids learn good morals and values by copying role models who are close to them," says Michele Borba, author of "Teaching Moral Intelligence." Experts say that even the most withdrawn teens scrutinize their parents for cues on how to act. So watch your behavior; don't gossip with your friends in front of the kids and downplay popularity as a lifetime goal. Parents need to understand and talk about the things that interest their kids—even if it's what Paris is wearing—without being judgmental. That makes it easier for kids to open up. "The really subtle thing you have to do is hear where they are coming from, and gently direct them into thinking about it," says Borba. That means these celebrities gone wild and all their tabloid antics can be teachable moments. Lesson No. 1: wear underwear.
TRANSLATION: Throw up your hands and bury your head in the sand. Hey! But at least it's DOING SOMETHING.
In the Europe edition we have a story on the continent's abandoned churches -- lots of them -- with this opening graf:
For the muslims [SIC!!!!!] of Clitheroe, collective worship has never been easy. It's been 40 years since the first Asians settled in the little town close to England's industrial heartland, but the 300-strong community has struggled ever since to find a suitable site for a mosque. No longer. In December the town council finally approved plans for the conversion of a handsome but derelict structure: a disused Methodist chapel. "There is a feeling of overwhelming relief and joy," says Sheraz Arshad, a local Muslim leader. "Just because it looks like a church, there's no reason why it can't be used as a mosque."
After that we read no further.
And the Asian and Latin American editions have a story on ultra-cheap PCs for the Third World, surely an inside joke given our SYNERGISTIC PARTNERSHIP.
JONBOY HITS THE TRIFECTA!
P. S. Great cover guys. (It just posted.) I could do that with my eyes closed -- and I guess you did, also.
P. P. S. at 8:55 a. m. on 2/5: They fixed that lower-case letter in a hurry!
And even if our adolescents pick up a few tricks from the Brit Pack, we have a big head start on them. We begin to teach our kids values while they're still in diapers. "Kids learn good morals and values by copying role models who are close to them," says Michele Borba, author of "Teaching Moral Intelligence." Experts say that even the most withdrawn teens scrutinize their parents for cues on how to act. So watch your behavior; don't gossip with your friends in front of the kids and downplay popularity as a lifetime goal. Parents need to understand and talk about the things that interest their kids—even if it's what Paris is wearing—without being judgmental. That makes it easier for kids to open up. "The really subtle thing you have to do is hear where they are coming from, and gently direct them into thinking about it," says Borba. That means these celebrities gone wild and all their tabloid antics can be teachable moments. Lesson No. 1: wear underwear.
TRANSLATION: Throw up your hands and bury your head in the sand. Hey! But at least it's DOING SOMETHING.
In the Europe edition we have a story on the continent's abandoned churches -- lots of them -- with this opening graf:
For the muslims [SIC!!!!!] of Clitheroe, collective worship has never been easy. It's been 40 years since the first Asians settled in the little town close to England's industrial heartland, but the 300-strong community has struggled ever since to find a suitable site for a mosque. No longer. In December the town council finally approved plans for the conversion of a handsome but derelict structure: a disused Methodist chapel. "There is a feeling of overwhelming relief and joy," says Sheraz Arshad, a local Muslim leader. "Just because it looks like a church, there's no reason why it can't be used as a mosque."
After that we read no further.
And the Asian and Latin American editions have a story on ultra-cheap PCs for the Third World, surely an inside joke given our SYNERGISTIC PARTNERSHIP.
JONBOY HITS THE TRIFECTA!
P. S. Great cover guys. (It just posted.) I could do that with my eyes closed -- and I guess you did, also.
P. P. S. at 8:55 a. m. on 2/5: They fixed that lower-case letter in a hurry!
I think we know where the Bugmeister's going to rake in most of his dough:
My somewhat older laptop had trouble with Vista itself, never mind the gadgets. At a creaky 18 months old, it didn't have the power to run anything but basic Vista, and it did that in fits and starts and very slowly. Worst of all, when I tried to roll the machine back to XP, I discovered that, once you do a full upgrade, Vista cannot be uninstalled. All you can do is reformat the hard drive, lose all your data and programs and reinstall XP all over again. Seeking confirmation of this from the Microsoft Website, I discovered the company was at that point charging $245 per incident for a support call.
In fairness to the Bug, I've been playing with His Office 2007 for a few days, and I must confess I think He has a winner there. The ribbons are far easier to work with than the old menu system. (Of course it helps that I paid $0 for it, but I still think it's an improvement.)
My somewhat older laptop had trouble with Vista itself, never mind the gadgets. At a creaky 18 months old, it didn't have the power to run anything but basic Vista, and it did that in fits and starts and very slowly. Worst of all, when I tried to roll the machine back to XP, I discovered that, once you do a full upgrade, Vista cannot be uninstalled. All you can do is reformat the hard drive, lose all your data and programs and reinstall XP all over again. Seeking confirmation of this from the Microsoft Website, I discovered the company was at that point charging $245 per incident for a support call.
In fairness to the Bug, I've been playing with His Office 2007 for a few days, and I must confess I think He has a winner there. The ribbons are far easier to work with than the old menu system. (Of course it helps that I paid $0 for it, but I still think it's an improvement.)
WHY INSTANT CULTURE WON'T WORK: Anyone can strum a gheetar. (Judging from the recorded-sound biz' masterpieces, anyone does.) What's important is what goes into the gheetar. The early rock acts at least had the stimulus of the old blues kings, or the rockabilly types, or (in The Beatles' case) the English music hall. Today's gheetar strummers have only other gheetar strummers, who got their inspiration from other cruddy rock acts. In short, we have garbage-in-garbage-out, and that's why pop "music" is now doomed to stink forever.
ANNOYING: When something (usually relating to what used to be called "morals") bugs some people for cause we news hacks can easily label the bugged as CONSERVATIVES, and strongly hint-hint that said conservatives are the kind of people who don't like to see others having a good time. Nor does it help that the conservative quoted here is named Gelernter, and obviously related to the famous Yale professor. Here's another reason the business's circ is slipping out from underneath it: it always makes fun of a good chunk of its readers, who happen to be a good chunk of US.
In the old days, when a politician's most ferocious enemy died, he might have let out a few choice expletives in private and then forgotten about it. Today I learned that Dubya issued "a statement" (no doubt not written by him) mourning the death of Molly Ivins, which, in its own way, confirmed her nickname for him: Shrub.
LAST GRAF (and please note this IS a SLIME property):
An image of two polar bears apparently stranded on melting ice off Alaska was used around the world yesterday to illustrate the dangers of climate change. These bears, however, were photographed in 2004, late in the summer when the ice melts naturally, and are thought to have swum safely to another ice floe. Disappearing sea ice is the bears’ greatest threat, and the IPCC predicts that it could disappear by the end of the century. However, as such strong swimmers, it is almost impossible for polar bears to be stranded on a breakaway ice floe. It is far more likely that this pair were just taking a breather.
We don't know what to think of global warming, but can we really expect the same AUGUST BODY that gave us ZIONISM IS RACISM to be definitive on anything except rotten judgment?
An image of two polar bears apparently stranded on melting ice off Alaska was used around the world yesterday to illustrate the dangers of climate change. These bears, however, were photographed in 2004, late in the summer when the ice melts naturally, and are thought to have swum safely to another ice floe. Disappearing sea ice is the bears’ greatest threat, and the IPCC predicts that it could disappear by the end of the century. However, as such strong swimmers, it is almost impossible for polar bears to be stranded on a breakaway ice floe. It is far more likely that this pair were just taking a breather.
We don't know what to think of global warming, but can we really expect the same AUGUST BODY that gave us ZIONISM IS RACISM to be definitive on anything except rotten judgment?
The idea that the calamity of Woodrow Wilson's last months in office, of a president living in seclusion and his wife governing the country, is a thing of the past is a delusion. Few knew of FDR's grave heart problems or JFK's manifold illnesses until years after the fact. Indeed Laura's secret surgery and the spell cast over Vice-President BIG OIL's buckshot friend indicate the powers upstairs may still have enough wherewithal to keep us in the dark about their frailties.
I view the VIACON-YouTube shouting match as nothing more than another tantrum between two huge media tyrannies. SUMNER wants to protect His fortune; the Dalai Lamas of Mountain View want to protect Theirs. The theft of intellectual property rights seems almost secondary here. With luck both tyrannies will make enough enemies among the people as to lose business, though I doubt it.
Speaking of the Paper of Re-CORD, I smell another J'ACCUSE coming:
Number of People Stopped by Police Soars in New York
No. 1., it's a big city. No. 2., it's an unsafe city. No. 3., can you blame the police after what's happened the last six years?
Number of People Stopped by Police Soars in New York
No. 1., it's a big city. No. 2., it's an unsafe city. No. 3., can you blame the police after what's happened the last six years?
At one point during the interview, Mr. Simpson says: “As things got heated, I just remember Nicole fell and hurt herself. And this guy kind of got into a karate thing.” It was then, he says, that “I remember I grabbed the knife.” Later, asked about whether he had taken off a glove before handling the knife, Mr. Simpson says, “You know, I had no conscious memory of doing that, but obviously I must have because they found a glove there.”
I want the news hacks of the world to continue to insist O. J. was innocent for PC reasons.
I want the news hacks of the world to continue to insist O. J. was innocent for PC reasons.
I'M MORE ANTI-WAR THAN YOU!
That's the spirit Hill -- GET MAD!
And here's a classic exhortation from Sen. Sandinista:
“Bipartisanship to me does not mean getting Democrats to agree with Republican principles!” Chris Dodd said. “It means getting Republicans to agree to Democratic principles!”
I do believe Sandy just waved bye-bye to his own chances. But don't tell that to Sandy.
(Via AmSpec)
That's the spirit Hill -- GET MAD!
And here's a classic exhortation from Sen. Sandinista:
“Bipartisanship to me does not mean getting Democrats to agree with Republican principles!” Chris Dodd said. “It means getting Republicans to agree to Democratic principles!”
I do believe Sandy just waved bye-bye to his own chances. But don't tell that to Sandy.
(Via AmSpec)
So! eBay has stopped auctions of those non-existent "implements" in digital war-and-witchcraft games. That $100 billion number sounds like a "Hi Mom!" moment (Ed Castronova? Meet PERFESSER THOMPSON!), but no doubt lots of people spend inordinate time playing these games that go in circles and lead nowhere. When archaeologists look back at this sad and shriveled age they will scratch their heads and wonder how so many could have wasted so much time in make-believe.
One thing's clear: if they ever get to the level of a real scam the Congressional hearings will be ridiculous.
And this, of course, largely involves SONY, the company that proudly gave the world ATRAC and ROOTKITS, and that seems managed with its head firmly up its behind.
P. S. PERFESSER CASTRONOVA is an economist, NATCH, and apparently he's spent lots of time making Hi Mom! moments:
His paper on Norrath, a fictional planet in the EverQuest universe, Virtual Worlds: A First-Hand Account of Market and Society on the Cyberian Frontier (2001) is available on SSRN. It claims, for example, that Norrath has a GDP per capita somewhere between that of Russia and Bulgaria, higher than that of China and India, and that a unit of EverQuest currency is worth more than the Yen or Lira.
Now what this guy needs is a special cell phone surgically stitched to his face, with immediate access to every news hack -- just like PERFESSER THOMPSON.
One thing's clear: if they ever get to the level of a real scam the Congressional hearings will be ridiculous.
And this, of course, largely involves SONY, the company that proudly gave the world ATRAC and ROOTKITS, and that seems managed with its head firmly up its behind.
P. S. PERFESSER CASTRONOVA is an economist, NATCH, and apparently he's spent lots of time making Hi Mom! moments:
His paper on Norrath, a fictional planet in the EverQuest universe, Virtual Worlds: A First-Hand Account of Market and Society on the Cyberian Frontier (2001) is available on SSRN. It claims, for example, that Norrath has a GDP per capita somewhere between that of Russia and Bulgaria, higher than that of China and India, and that a unit of EverQuest currency is worth more than the Yen or Lira.
Now what this guy needs is a special cell phone surgically stitched to his face, with immediate access to every news hack -- just like PERFESSER THOMPSON.
Friday, February 02, 2007
How apt that Stephen King is moving into comic books. He should have started there in the first place.
"These comics aren't junk food; they're more like delicacies," King said. "Sushi for the mind, if you like. You have to teach yourself how to read 'adult comics,' which are actually comic/novel hybrids...."
Sounds like sushi and bubble gum for the mind.
"These comics aren't junk food; they're more like delicacies," King said. "Sushi for the mind, if you like. You have to teach yourself how to read 'adult comics,' which are actually comic/novel hybrids...."
Sounds like sushi and bubble gum for the mind.
Another mea culpa from SLIME: His writer moans at all the amateur culture that's ruining the country. First off, the "professionals" have forsaken their calling by putting out their own brand of rank amateurism; anyone who can compare the "best" of today favorably with the best of seventy years ago is an ad-blurbist or looking for work, or both. (That this clown praises TV commercials is a solid clue.) Second, there have been amateur hours before: SLIME's contest's antecedents date back at least to vaudeville and beyond. Does anyone remember (for an example) Tommy Dorsey's amateur song-writing contest, forced on him by a snit between ASCAP and the burgeoning BMI? The country survived. Third, which is worse: that rank amateurs "rule the culture" or that the professionals have lowered their own standards? I say lowering the standards prepared the ground for these Visigoths, who merely took advantage of the widening breach in high-tech's wall. At any rate, it begs the question: our culture stinks regardless of its provenance. It might be more than the paid status of its creators.
Da Bears got a taxpayer-financed spaceship that ruined a classic venue. The Colts moved in the dead of night from Baltimore.
WHO CARES WHO WINS?
WHO CARES WHO WINS?
So! Dubya's big gasohol push may lead to higher food prices; but it will help where it can help best -- in CONGRESSPOOPS' CAMPAIGN CHESTS!
Who knew corn was so profitable?
Who knew corn was so profitable?
MORE CEO LUXURY-BOX NEWS: The big A-B is using the game to sell Bud Light (it "led all domestic light beers by growing shipments 4% during 2006, according to a Beer Marketer's Insights estimate") (!), Bud ("which saw shipments slide 5.8% during 2006"), and Bud Select (whose "sales fell by double digits last year").
Good luck with all those animals! Pfffffffffffffffffffft!
Good luck with all those animals! Pfffffffffffffffffffft!
Calm thinking at NRO:
The Crucible in Boston [Mario Loyola]
I THINK THE BOSTON AUTHORITIES SHOULD BE ABSOLUTELY ASHAMED OF THEMSELVES!! THEY MISTOOK OBVIOUS TOYS FOR BOMBS AND SENT THE ENTIRE CITY INTO A PAROXYSM OF WAR-ON-TERROR PARANOIA!! AND NOW THEY'RE TAKING OUT THEIR FRUSTRATIONS BY LYNCHING TWO QUASI-HIPPIES WHO QUITE ARE QUITE RIGHTLY MOCKING THEM AND EVERYONE ELSE WHO THINKS THEY DID SOMETHING WRONG!!!
REPORTS THAT THOSE GUYS HELD BACK FROM EXPLAINING THE PROVENANCE OF THE GADGETS ARE SERIOUS IF THEY KNOWINGLY HELD BACK FOR ANY SIGNIFICANT LENGTH OF TIME. BUT THE MAIN POINT IS THAT BY THE TIME THEY FIGURED OUT THAT IT WAS ALL THEIR FAULT, THE AUTHORITIES HAD ALREADY CAUSED A CITY-WIDE PANIC OVER FUNNY-LOOKING GADGETS THAT LOOK EXACTLY NOTHING LIKE A BOMB!!!!
WHETHER THOSE GUYS DID ANYTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR, THE BOSTON AUTHORITIES SHOULD APOLOGIZE FOR TURNING THE UNITED STATES INTO A PLANETARY LAUGHING-STOCK!!!!! THE EUROPEAN PRESS IS GOING TO HAVE A FIELD DAY WITH THIS!!!!! NORMALLY WORLD OPINION CAN COOK IN ITS OWN STEW AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED, BUT I'M GOING TO BE TRAVELING ABROAD SOON AND I REALLY HOPE I DON'T HAVE TO ANSWER QUESTIONS ABOUT THIS INCREDIBLY EMBARRASSING INCIDENT!!!!!!!!!!
02/02 08:46 AM [Overemphasis added]
Mario also uses Democrat as an adjective. NUF SAID.
P. S. at 1:30 P. M.: Super Mario changed his mind. He must have gotten e-mails.
The Crucible in Boston [Mario Loyola]
I THINK THE BOSTON AUTHORITIES SHOULD BE ABSOLUTELY ASHAMED OF THEMSELVES!! THEY MISTOOK OBVIOUS TOYS FOR BOMBS AND SENT THE ENTIRE CITY INTO A PAROXYSM OF WAR-ON-TERROR PARANOIA!! AND NOW THEY'RE TAKING OUT THEIR FRUSTRATIONS BY LYNCHING TWO QUASI-HIPPIES WHO QUITE ARE QUITE RIGHTLY MOCKING THEM AND EVERYONE ELSE WHO THINKS THEY DID SOMETHING WRONG!!!
REPORTS THAT THOSE GUYS HELD BACK FROM EXPLAINING THE PROVENANCE OF THE GADGETS ARE SERIOUS IF THEY KNOWINGLY HELD BACK FOR ANY SIGNIFICANT LENGTH OF TIME. BUT THE MAIN POINT IS THAT BY THE TIME THEY FIGURED OUT THAT IT WAS ALL THEIR FAULT, THE AUTHORITIES HAD ALREADY CAUSED A CITY-WIDE PANIC OVER FUNNY-LOOKING GADGETS THAT LOOK EXACTLY NOTHING LIKE A BOMB!!!!
WHETHER THOSE GUYS DID ANYTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR, THE BOSTON AUTHORITIES SHOULD APOLOGIZE FOR TURNING THE UNITED STATES INTO A PLANETARY LAUGHING-STOCK!!!!! THE EUROPEAN PRESS IS GOING TO HAVE A FIELD DAY WITH THIS!!!!! NORMALLY WORLD OPINION CAN COOK IN ITS OWN STEW AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED, BUT I'M GOING TO BE TRAVELING ABROAD SOON AND I REALLY HOPE I DON'T HAVE TO ANSWER QUESTIONS ABOUT THIS INCREDIBLY EMBARRASSING INCIDENT!!!!!!!!!!
02/02 08:46 AM [Overemphasis added]
Mario also uses Democrat as an adjective. NUF SAID.
P. S. at 1:30 P. M.: Super Mario changed his mind. He must have gotten e-mails.
"We cannot, we should not, we must not permit Iran to build or acquire nuclear weapons."
Another trick question, Hill: How would you cannot, should not, must not permit it?
(Via NewsMax!!!!!)
Another trick question, Hill: How would you cannot, should not, must not permit it?
(Via NewsMax!!!!!)
Speaking of THE GAMES, London 2012 has tripled in cost -- and it's still five years away!
TAX AND LOTTERY DOLLARS TO THE RESCUE!!!!!
TAX AND LOTTERY DOLLARS TO THE RESCUE!!!!!
The latest gimmick in the consumer electronics biz is the "smart TV." Leaving aside whether this is an oxymoron, the Bugmisters have tried to mate TVs and computers for several decades, and we suspect they'll be at it for a while yet.
Some day, however, high-definition resolution may change as technology evolves. But incremental improvements will increasingly matter less, says Crutchfield's Simon. Most people can't tell the subtle differences between high-end TV technologies. "Your eyes are only so good," he says.
You mean raw sewage can only smell so many ways?
Some day, however, high-definition resolution may change as technology evolves. But incremental improvements will increasingly matter less, says Crutchfield's Simon. Most people can't tell the subtle differences between high-end TV technologies. "Your eyes are only so good," he says.
You mean raw sewage can only smell so many ways?
Speaking of the greatest gathering of CEOs this side of THE GAMES, or a Federal pen:
Super Bowl XLI
Tank Johnson Rests His Case
After a week of explaining multiple arrests, Bears' defensive tackle has nothing left to say. [Home-page squib]
Somebody! ANYBODY!
Super Bowl XLI
Tank Johnson Rests His Case
After a week of explaining multiple arrests, Bears' defensive tackle has nothing left to say. [Home-page squib]
Somebody! ANYBODY!
What is the difference between the Super Bowl and a shredder?
We doubt the money the CEOs throw at it can tell.
OR:
Consumers will probably remember the incident that made them cringe more than they will any larger marketing message.
TRANSLATION: THE PUBLIC BE DAMNED!!!!! I HAVE MY LUXURY BOX!!!!!!!!!!
(Via MediaBistro)
We doubt the money the CEOs throw at it can tell.
OR:
Consumers will probably remember the incident that made them cringe more than they will any larger marketing message.
TRANSLATION: THE PUBLIC BE DAMNED!!!!! I HAVE MY LUXURY BOX!!!!!!!!!!
(Via MediaBistro)
We hope PINCH didn't run this for the usual PC reasons, but his writer reminds us there's a dreadful price to pay in pro football, something the millionaire jackasses of the media will not remind us of on Sunday night.
Dubya burnishes his reputation, again:
The Bush administration has failed to carry out the September 11 Commission's recommendations aimed at improving the American intelligence network, panel members said.
The nation's 16 spy agencies are still slow to share information and there's no evidence that it's easier to move money and personnel among the agencies, members of the September 11 Commission said. The most visible accomplishment of the current director of national intelligence, John Negroponte, has been to amass a staff of more than 1,300, they say.
The Bush administration has failed to carry out the September 11 Commission's recommendations aimed at improving the American intelligence network, panel members said.
The nation's 16 spy agencies are still slow to share information and there's no evidence that it's easier to move money and personnel among the agencies, members of the September 11 Commission said. The most visible accomplishment of the current director of national intelligence, John Negroponte, has been to amass a staff of more than 1,300, they say.
The latest gag with the hacks is to speak of a "generation gap" regarding the TWXSTERS' promotion. This is just another tiresome variation on the OJ shtick where the hacks said, "If you're white he's guilty and if you're black he's innocent." Fortunately the law enforcement types (who will be facing down the O word -- overreact -- for weeks) are standing firm. This was just an idiotic stunt, and this is just hacks once again calling a spade a diamond, a heart, a club, a pitchfork, a dagger, or a shovel.
Thursday, February 01, 2007
Flu rating system unveiled Similar to storm rankings.
TRANSLATION: The Feds are COLOR-CODING epidemics.
TRANSLATION: The Feds are COLOR-CODING epidemics.
Okay everybody -- repeat after me! One, two, three:
DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....
(Of course I could have said SLASHDOT.)
P. S.
Jamie Tedford, senior vice president for Hub ad agency Arnold Worldwide, said Interference’s effort has morphed into a successful viral campaign online. “It spread more rapidly because of the controversy, but the fact that it has become a controversy has contributed to its success,” he said.
RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCE CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIN!!!!!!!!!!
The Senate has voted to raise the minimum wage to $7.25 an hour over two years.
LARRY KUDLOW! THE ECONOMY IS RUINED!!!!!
LARRY KUDLOW! THE ECONOMY IS RUINED!!!!!
Hip-hopping crack kingpin guilty, faces death penalty
Another [C]RAPPER makes a BRILLIANT career move.
McGriff, who was acquitted on lesser drugs and weapons charges, looked back and smiled at his supporters when the verdict was issued.
He agrees.
McGriff succeeded in making a straight-to-video film, “Crime Partners 2000,” that featured Ja Rule, Snoop Dogg and Ice-T. The movie, about two hit men, was released in 2001.
For an ex-convict to produce a film is “an achievement,” said defense attorney David Ruhnke.
“They will never take that away from him.”
1. Tell that to hordes on YouTube. 2. He can boast about it in the inferno. (Link added)
Another [C]RAPPER makes a BRILLIANT career move.
McGriff, who was acquitted on lesser drugs and weapons charges, looked back and smiled at his supporters when the verdict was issued.
He agrees.
McGriff succeeded in making a straight-to-video film, “Crime Partners 2000,” that featured Ja Rule, Snoop Dogg and Ice-T. The movie, about two hit men, was released in 2001.
For an ex-convict to produce a film is “an achievement,” said defense attorney David Ruhnke.
“They will never take that away from him.”
1. Tell that to hordes on YouTube. 2. He can boast about it in the inferno. (Link added)
We wonder if Jake wrote this piece because he had nothing better to do, or maybe he was behind on his quota. "He's Winning -- Here's How to Beat Him" on the home pages fades into "The Two Clocks: Getting Iran wrong, again", which is framed by "Democracy building is failing in Iraq. But it could work in Iran" on the window. (Why not seven or eight other heds?) Jake suggests we stop the "brinkmanship" and agree to some sort of deal whereby Nukeman stops his uranium enrichment (in public, no doubt), setting up a "long palaver" to follow (what have we had these last three years?) that would lead to Iran abiding by treaties (in public, no doubt), then Jake says we're on the wrong side, that Carter helped bring in the holy flamethrowers and Jeane Kirkpatrick helped bring down Communism, and there's this opponent of Nukeman who hates our foreign policy, and....
I just learned CVS sells 120-count aspirin bottles for ninety-nine cents. Here's one use.
P. S. And as if on cue:
Ahmadinejad Defiant on Nuke Program
I just learned CVS sells 120-count aspirin bottles for ninety-nine cents. Here's one use.
P. S. And as if on cue:
Ahmadinejad Defiant on Nuke Program
THE POLITICO MAKES NEWS AGAIN, disclosing that the Congressional Hispanic Caucus has a double standard toward women!
Really, I'm not sure why this is so earth-shattering. Haven't Congresspoops called each other names before? And it's not like the names they call the PUBLIC.
Really, I'm not sure why this is so earth-shattering. Haven't Congresspoops called each other names before? And it's not like the names they call the PUBLIC.
LAST TWO GRAFS:
As the delegates hold their evening session, the Eiffel Tower, other Paris monuments and concerned citizens in several European countries were expected to switch off their lights for five minutes to call attention to energy conservation, heeding a call by French environmental campaigners.
Some experts said that while well-intentioned, turning the lights out could actually consume more energy than it would conserve by requiring a power spike when the lights turn back on - possibly causing brownouts or even blackouts.
Thanks again, ASSPress!
As the delegates hold their evening session, the Eiffel Tower, other Paris monuments and concerned citizens in several European countries were expected to switch off their lights for five minutes to call attention to energy conservation, heeding a call by French environmental campaigners.
Some experts said that while well-intentioned, turning the lights out could actually consume more energy than it would conserve by requiring a power spike when the lights turn back on - possibly causing brownouts or even blackouts.
Thanks again, ASSPress!
Two fake pipe bombs found not part of marketing stunt
Does it occur to the MORONS who are saying HIP that something like the TWXSTERS' stunt COULD have served as a distraction to a REAL disaster? How many of these MORONS would have been laughing and putting on their blasé routine THEN?
I think that's what gets me about all this idiot HIP talk -- it's a handmaiden of the PC movement, another way to force conformity of thought and laxity of values.
Does it occur to the MORONS who are saying HIP that something like the TWXSTERS' stunt COULD have served as a distraction to a REAL disaster? How many of these MORONS would have been laughing and putting on their blasé routine THEN?
I think that's what gets me about all this idiot HIP talk -- it's a handmaiden of the PC movement, another way to force conformity of thought and laxity of values.
Any city with armies of homeless on the street will probably not know about stupid senseless movie promotions, nor will it have the brains to care.
Well! Here's another music the LEGENDARY DAVISES and CHEAP CHANNELS killed: the blues. Not that melisma-laden "urban" treacle or [C]RAP, the BLUES, as in B. B. King blues, as in Ray Charles blues, as in Robert Johnson blues. Of course the blues would be dead because at its best it's raw and powerful, and the P&Gs and the recorded-sound biz Mafiosi don't want anything powerful, unless it's musical Ex-Lax to relieve people of their dough.