Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Friday, January 24, 2003

    Posted 11:26 AM by Gene

    Sighhhhhhhhhh. Barry Diller walks on water again. He's a "genius." (Another word to ban from the news hack's lexicon.) So was Legendary Welch. So was Dennis Kozlowski. So was Roberto "I Introduced New Coke Because I Smoke All the Time And Couldn't Tell the Difference" Goizueta. These show-biz "geniuses" in particular do nothing but package the same old baloney in the same old nice new wrappers. I guess that's why news hacks call them "geniuses."

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