THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
Blogroll Me!
![[Powered by Blogger]](http://buttons.blogger.com/bloggerbutton1.gif){kind=small}
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Well, there is a very thin silver lining to this very dark cloud:
From coast to coast, American teenagers appear to be driving less this summer. Police officers who keep watch on weekend cruising zones say fewer youths are spending their time driving around in circles, with more of them hanging out in parking lots, malls or movie theaters.
From coast to coast, American teenagers appear to be driving less this summer. Police officers who keep watch on weekend cruising zones say fewer youths are spending their time driving around in circles, with more of them hanging out in parking lots, malls or movie theaters.
If "vast and impersonal forces" are raising the price of oil why has it gone up so much in the last six months, especially when this "peak oil" business was surely known for years and years?
And what is the practical difference between speculation and "market psychology"? I don't see any; they work for the same purpose of creating panics, and both have the same malevolent streak.
And yes, maybe we are looking for a scapegoat, and yes, it's a cheap and easy thing, but somebody's trading, and somebody's selling, and somebody's buying or not buying, and these vast impersonal forces ultimately comprise FLESH-AND-BLOOD PEOPLE. One may as well say vast impersonal forces brought on Communism and Hitler.
Meantime our economy's tanking and nobody seems to be doing a damned thing about it, except posturing.
I wish some high-powered pundits would stop thinking they can EXPLAIN things.
"It's most important for Congress to stop blaming everyone for oil prices -- from big oil to OPEC to speculators, and really get down to the fundamentals of the market, which is about dramatically reducing demand in the U.S. and the world for oil, increasing supply, driving alternatives into the market," said Robbie Diamond, director of the think tank Securing America's Energy Future.
WHEN?!?!?
And what is the practical difference between speculation and "market psychology"? I don't see any; they work for the same purpose of creating panics, and both have the same malevolent streak.
And yes, maybe we are looking for a scapegoat, and yes, it's a cheap and easy thing, but somebody's trading, and somebody's selling, and somebody's buying or not buying, and these vast impersonal forces ultimately comprise FLESH-AND-BLOOD PEOPLE. One may as well say vast impersonal forces brought on Communism and Hitler.
Meantime our economy's tanking and nobody seems to be doing a damned thing about it, except posturing.
I wish some high-powered pundits would stop thinking they can EXPLAIN things.
"It's most important for Congress to stop blaming everyone for oil prices -- from big oil to OPEC to speculators, and really get down to the fundamentals of the market, which is about dramatically reducing demand in the U.S. and the world for oil, increasing supply, driving alternatives into the market," said Robbie Diamond, director of the think tank Securing America's Energy Future.
WHEN?!?!?
Correction: June 28, 2008
Because of an editing error, an article on Friday about cast albums of current Broadway musicals misidentified an award won by “Passing Strange.” It won the Tony for best book of a musical — not for best original score, which went to “In the Heights.”
Would anyone notice this mistake in a panegyric few have read for cast albums hardly anyone outside Branson East will ever listen to?
Because of an editing error, an article on Friday about cast albums of current Broadway musicals misidentified an award won by “Passing Strange.” It won the Tony for best book of a musical — not for best original score, which went to “In the Heights.”
Would anyone notice this mistake in a panegyric few have read for cast albums hardly anyone outside Branson East will ever listen to?
The prices of commodities often change unexpectedly, making business risky. THE SPECULATOR BRINGS A DEGREE OF CERTAINTY TO OTHERWISE RISKY VENTURES. When supplies of a commodity are plentiful and prices low -- but speculators expect the price to rise later -- they buy -- cushioning the COLLAPSE of prices. When supplies become scarcer and prices rise, they SELL -- EASING THE SHORTAGE AND LOWERING THE PRICE. Also, speculators may agree to buy a commodity in the future for a price locked in today. This reduces the risk for an oil producer or farmer who fears investing because he doesn't know what price his product will sell for next year.
As a result of these activities, volatile supplies and prices are EVENED OUT over time. OCCASIONALLY, speculators increase volatility. Markets are never perfect. (ALTHOUGH THEY ARE BETTER THAN GOVERNMENT REGULATION!!) But in general, SPECULATORS INCREASE LIQUIDITY AND KEEP THE MARKET ON A MORE EVEN KEEL. This makes long-term planning EASIER for everyone.
IT WOULD BE NICE IF MCCAIN WOULD FINALLY LEARN SOME ECONOMICS!!!!! [Even-keeled overemphasis added]
(Oops! Wrong link.)
As a result of these activities, volatile supplies and prices are EVENED OUT over time. OCCASIONALLY, speculators increase volatility. Markets are never perfect. (ALTHOUGH THEY ARE BETTER THAN GOVERNMENT REGULATION!!) But in general, SPECULATORS INCREASE LIQUIDITY AND KEEP THE MARKET ON A MORE EVEN KEEL. This makes long-term planning EASIER for everyone.
IT WOULD BE NICE IF MCCAIN WOULD FINALLY LEARN SOME ECONOMICS!!!!! [Even-keeled overemphasis added]
(Oops! Wrong link.)
A once tennis star makes stoopid remarks about some females of the species, which the ASSPress chose NOT to disseminate, and then apologized for the remarks ASSPress readers are now scratching their heads about.
Earl Butz lives!
Earl Butz lives!
A rare critical show-biz article -- and from SI, yet! -- that hints THE CONSPIRACY is pouring its money down a 3-D rathole. When we see something like this:
The Motion Picture Association of America claims that 2007 was a good year for the cinema business, with U.S. box office revenue up 5 percent to $9.6 billion. But that’s unsupportable spin. The jump can be almost entirely attributed to a bump in ticket prices. The number of tickets sold in the U.S. stayed flat from 2006 to 2007, at 1.5 billion. (In 1950, while TV was taking off, U.S. theaters sold 3 billion tickets a year—and the population was half what it is today.) Meanwhile, 379 screens were added between 2006 and 2007. Do the math and movies are doing worse than ever in theaters. [Emphasis added]
...you know the writer needs a reeducation camp. Send him to the ASSPress's Stupid Twins, DAVID "300" BAUDER and DAVID "NON" GERMAIN; they'll know what to do. He does hedge his connections by hinting the movies themselves aren't the problem, just all those "crummy seats" and not serving alcohol. [!] But when he concludes by saying that 3-D is "a temporary cure for a situation that will only get worse over time", perhaps movies AREN'T better than ever.
The Motion Picture Association of America claims that 2007 was a good year for the cinema business, with U.S. box office revenue up 5 percent to $9.6 billion. But that’s unsupportable spin. The jump can be almost entirely attributed to a bump in ticket prices. The number of tickets sold in the U.S. stayed flat from 2006 to 2007, at 1.5 billion. (In 1950, while TV was taking off, U.S. theaters sold 3 billion tickets a year—and the population was half what it is today.) Meanwhile, 379 screens were added between 2006 and 2007. Do the math and movies are doing worse than ever in theaters. [Emphasis added]
...you know the writer needs a reeducation camp. Send him to the ASSPress's Stupid Twins, DAVID "300" BAUDER and DAVID "NON" GERMAIN; they'll know what to do. He does hedge his connections by hinting the movies themselves aren't the problem, just all those "crummy seats" and not serving alcohol. [!] But when he concludes by saying that 3-D is "a temporary cure for a situation that will only get worse over time", perhaps movies AREN'T better than ever.
Friday, June 27, 2008
A former client of Hahvahd Mutual Fund bemoans the widening gap between rich and poor -- and suggests a brilliant solution...in the last graf:
The United States once led the world in the rate at which its citizens finished college; it now falls in the middle of the OECD pack. It could lead again if Americans made a decision to fund higher education the way they chose to fund universal public high-school education early in the last century.
Couldn't your Fund do just as good a job by merely redistributing some of its wealth? Or must the turnips forever redistribute it to YOU?
(Via Arts & Letters Daily)
The United States once led the world in the rate at which its citizens finished college; it now falls in the middle of the OECD pack. It could lead again if Americans made a decision to fund higher education the way they chose to fund universal public high-school education early in the last century.
Couldn't your Fund do just as good a job by merely redistributing some of its wealth? Or must the turnips forever redistribute it to YOU?
(Via Arts & Letters Daily)
The Secretary of KELLOGG's says those converter-box coupons shouldn't expire, which suggests his mind is still somewhere around Battle Creek.
Or maybe not, because if he still ran Kellogg's he'd insist they expire in sixty days.
Or maybe not, because if he still ran Kellogg's he'd insist they expire in sixty days.
Senator Chuck Hagel declined to endorse his party's likely presidential nominee, John McCain, and said he would consider serving as secretary of defense in a Barack Obama administration.
How 'bout secretary of ETHANOL?
How 'bout secretary of ETHANOL?
Who Will Fill Bill Gates' Shoes?
Judging from some of the names he tosses out, it might still be the Bugmeister.
Judging from some of the names he tosses out, it might still be the Bugmeister.
So! Mark Steyn won't have to worry about Canada's national PC police, which should not have been sicced on him in the first place.
(VIa -- alas -- The Corner)
(VIa -- alas -- The Corner)
Loath though we are to say a pundit has something right, Brooksy has something right:
Liberals have a way to address...inequalities — the creation of a Denmark-style welfare state. Conservatives have offered almost nothing.
This is because liberals are busy puffing up outfits like DONTAFSCME and con-SER-va-tives are busy puffing up the hyperrich. Do even the authors of Grand New Party think this can change?
Liberals have a way to address...inequalities — the creation of a Denmark-style welfare state. Conservatives have offered almost nothing.
This is because liberals are busy puffing up outfits like DONTAFSCME and con-SER-va-tives are busy puffing up the hyperrich. Do even the authors of Grand New Party think this can change?
I would not hold my breath that the third world is going soft on nukes, for other parts of the third world are getting harder.
"The United States has no illusions about the regime in Pyongyang," Bush said.
BUT....
On Thursday, North Korean officials turned over to China a 60-page declaration, written in English, that details several rounds of plutonium production at the Yongbyon plant dating back to 1986. [Emphasis added]
YASSIR ARAFAT LIVES!
"The United States has no illusions about the regime in Pyongyang," Bush said.
BUT....
On Thursday, North Korean officials turned over to China a 60-page declaration, written in English, that details several rounds of plutonium production at the Yongbyon plant dating back to 1986. [Emphasis added]
YASSIR ARAFAT LIVES!
Thursday, June 26, 2008
“IF DAVE OBEY WANTS TO BE THE CHAIRMAN OF THIS COMMITTEE, HE CAN GET 35 ADDITIONAL DEMOCRATS ELECTED SO HE CAN TAKE THE CHAIR!” Lewis said later. “UNTIL THEN, WE’RE RUNNING THE COMMITTEE!!! AND WE’RE SETTING THE AGENDA!!!!!”
Oops:
“IF JERRY LEWIS WANTS TO BE THE CHAIRMAN OF THIS COMMITTEE, HE CAN GET 35 ADDITIONAL REPUBLICANS ELECTED SO HE CAN TAKE THE CHAIR!” Obey said later. “UNTIL THEN, WE’RE RUNNING THE COMMITTEE!!! AND WE’RE SETTING THE AGENDA!!!!!” [Word changes and agenda-setting overemphasis added]
Trying for SINGLE DIGITS, guys?
Oops:
“IF JERRY LEWIS WANTS TO BE THE CHAIRMAN OF THIS COMMITTEE, HE CAN GET 35 ADDITIONAL REPUBLICANS ELECTED SO HE CAN TAKE THE CHAIR!” Obey said later. “UNTIL THEN, WE’RE RUNNING THE COMMITTEE!!! AND WE’RE SETTING THE AGENDA!!!!!” [Word changes and agenda-setting overemphasis added]
Trying for SINGLE DIGITS, guys?
Shucks, The Econowiz really wanted to use the word LEGENDARY for its biggest fan the Bugmeister, and it tried, really tried, but other words had to come up:
Despite all [His] efforts, the PC, Mr Gates’s obsession, has ended up as an internet terminal.
Despite all [His] efforts, the PC, Mr Gates’s obsession, has ended up as an internet terminal.
The same Wall Street casino that's trying to start a depression thinks it can make money starting a depression. It's all one; they get a vicarious thrill either way. Indeed one guesses the vicarious thrill at starting a depression is greater than running the Dow up 75,000 points because they think they won't get hurt.
"Crude oil is unlikely to face a major correction without a major bottom in the dollar or large cut in global demand," said Thomas Hartmann, an analyst at Altavest Worldwide Trading. "Inflation appears on track to get 'out of control' before the situation improves."
Thanks again, Dwights!
"Crude oil is unlikely to face a major correction without a major bottom in the dollar or large cut in global demand," said Thomas Hartmann, an analyst at Altavest Worldwide Trading. "Inflation appears on track to get 'out of control' before the situation improves."
Thanks again, Dwights!
It's a wonder no one invented a brothel on wheels before, but then in vans the service usually came for free.
TRANSLATION: A Vegas hearse with a bed and a bar.
TRANSLATION: A Vegas hearse with a bed and a bar.
One thing our next president might do is to start a crash course in alternate fuels. Ninety-five percent of the money will be wasted, but we can't go on financing dictatorships forever.
The world’s biggest maker of consumer goods has urged Barack Obama and John McCain not to talk the US into a “worse recession” during the presidential election by being too gloomy over the state of the economy.
AG Lafley, chairman and chief executive of Procter & Gamble, told the Financial Times he was concerned by the “woe is me and ain’t it awful” rhetoric adopted by Hillary Clinton and Mr Obama during their fierce battle for the Democrat nomination.
“In my business we don’t need excessive negativism,” said Mr Lafley. “You know we are in a business where psychology matters – even in the staples business – and in the economy psychology matters. It could go negative on the economy, that could be a problem . . . We will talk ourselves into a worse recession.”
Hey Laff, we got an idea -- lay off a few thousand workers, then increase prices, then spend the resulting billions on JUNK TELEVISION telling us how hunky dory things are!
AG Lafley, chairman and chief executive of Procter & Gamble, told the Financial Times he was concerned by the “woe is me and ain’t it awful” rhetoric adopted by Hillary Clinton and Mr Obama during their fierce battle for the Democrat nomination.
“In my business we don’t need excessive negativism,” said Mr Lafley. “You know we are in a business where psychology matters – even in the staples business – and in the economy psychology matters. It could go negative on the economy, that could be a problem . . . We will talk ourselves into a worse recession.”
Hey Laff, we got an idea -- lay off a few thousand workers, then increase prices, then spend the resulting billions on JUNK TELEVISION telling us how hunky dory things are!
---- Original Message ----
From: Bill Gates
Sent: Wednesday, January 15, 2003 10:05 AM
To: Jim Allchin
Cc: Chris Jones (WINDOWS); Bharat Shah (NT); Joe Peterson; Will Poole; Brian Valentine; Anoop Gupta (RESEARCH)
Subject: Windows Usability Systematic degradation flame
I am quite disappointed at how Windows Usability has been going backwards and the program management groups don't drive usability issues.
Let me give you my experience from yesterday.
I decided to download (Moviemaker) and buy the Digital Plus pack ... so I went to Microsoft.com. They have a download place so I went there.
The first 5 times I used the site it timed out while trying to bring up the download page. Then after an 8 second delay I got it to come up.
This site is so slow it is unusable.
It wasn't in the top 5 so I expanded the other 45.
These 45 names are totally confusing. These names make stuff like: C:\Documents and Settings\billg\My Documents\My Pictures seem clear.
They are not filtered by the system ... and so many of the things are strange.
I tried scoping to Media stuff. Still no moviemaker. I typed in movie. Nothing. I typed in movie maker. Nothing.
So I gave up and sent mail to Amir saying - where is this Moviemaker download? Does it exist?
So they told me that using the download page to download something was not something they anticipated.
They told me to go to the main page search button and type movie maker (not moviemaker!).
I tried that. The site was pathetically slow but after 6 seconds of waiting up it came.
I thought for sure now I would see a button to just go do the download.
In fact it is more like a puzzle that you get to solve. It told me to go to Windows Update and do a bunch of incantations.
This struck me as completely odd. Why should I have to go somewhere else and do a scan to download moviemaker?
So I went to Windows update. Windows Update decides I need to download a bunch of controls. (Not) just once but multiple times where I get to see weird dialog boxes.
Doesn't Windows update know some key to talk to Windows?
Then I did the scan. This took quite some time and I was told it was critical for me to download 17megs of stuff.
This is after I was told we were doing delta patches to things but instead just to get 6 things that are labeled in the SCARIEST possible way I had to download 17meg.
So I did the download. That part was fast. Then it wanted to do an install. This took 6 minutes and the machine was so slow I couldn't use it for anything else during this time.
What the heck is going on during those 6 minutes? That is crazy. This is after the download was finished.
Then it told me to reboot my machine. Why should I do that? I reboot every night -- why should I reboot at that time?
So I did the reboot because it INSISTED on it. Of course that meant completely getting rid of all my Outlook state.
So I got back up and running and went to Windows Update again. I forgot why I was in Windows Update at all since all I wanted was to get Moviemaker.
So I went back to Microsoft.com and looked at the instructions. I have to click on a folder called WindowsXP. Why should I do that? Windows Update knows I am on Windows XP.
What does it mean to have to click on that folder? So I get a bunch of confusing stuff but sure enough one of them is Moviemaker.
So I do the download. The download is fast but the Install takes many minutes. Amazing how slow this thing is.
At some point I get told I need to go get Windows Media Series 9 to download.
So I decide I will go do that. This time I get dialogs saying things like "Open" or "Save". No guidance in the instructions which to do. I have no clue which to do.
The download is fast and the install takes 7 minutes for this thing.
So now I think I am going to have Moviemaker. I go to my add/remove programs place to make sure it is there.
It is not there.
What is there? The following garbage is there. Microsoft Autoupdate Exclusive test package, Microsoft Autoupdate Reboot test package, Microsoft Autoupdate testpackage1. Microsoft AUtoupdate testpackage2, Microsoft Autoupdate Test package3.
Someone decided to trash the one part of Windows that was usable? The file system is no longer usable. The registry is not usable. This program listing was one sane place but now it is all crapped up.
But that is just the start of the crap. Later I have listed things like Windows XP Hotfix see Q329048 for more information. What is Q329048? Why are these series of patches listed here? Some of the patches just things like Q810655 instead of saying see Q329048 for more information.
What an absolute mess.
Moviemaker is just not there at all.
So I give up on Moviemaker and decide to download the Digital Plus Package.
I get told I need to go enter a bunch of information about myself.
I enter it all in and because it decides I have mistyped something I have to try again. Of course it has cleared out most of what I typed.
I try (typing) the right stuff in 5 times and it just keeps clearing things out for me to type them in again.
So after more than an hour of craziness and making my programs list garbage and being scared and seeing that Microsoft.com is a terrible website I haven't run Moviemaker and I haven't got the plus package.
The lack of attention to usability represented by these experiences blows my mind. I thought we had reached a low with Windows Network places or the messages I get when I try to use 802.11. (don't you just love that root certificate message?)
When I really get to use the stuff I am sure I will have more feedback.
Bugmeister's last will and testament.
(Via Gizmodo via Slashdot)
From: Bill Gates
Sent: Wednesday, January 15, 2003 10:05 AM
To: Jim Allchin
Cc: Chris Jones (WINDOWS); Bharat Shah (NT); Joe Peterson; Will Poole; Brian Valentine; Anoop Gupta (RESEARCH)
Subject: Windows Usability Systematic degradation flame
I am quite disappointed at how Windows Usability has been going backwards and the program management groups don't drive usability issues.
Let me give you my experience from yesterday.
I decided to download (Moviemaker) and buy the Digital Plus pack ... so I went to Microsoft.com. They have a download place so I went there.
The first 5 times I used the site it timed out while trying to bring up the download page. Then after an 8 second delay I got it to come up.
This site is so slow it is unusable.
It wasn't in the top 5 so I expanded the other 45.
These 45 names are totally confusing. These names make stuff like: C:\Documents and Settings\billg\My Documents\My Pictures seem clear.
They are not filtered by the system ... and so many of the things are strange.
I tried scoping to Media stuff. Still no moviemaker. I typed in movie. Nothing. I typed in movie maker. Nothing.
So I gave up and sent mail to Amir saying - where is this Moviemaker download? Does it exist?
So they told me that using the download page to download something was not something they anticipated.
They told me to go to the main page search button and type movie maker (not moviemaker!).
I tried that. The site was pathetically slow but after 6 seconds of waiting up it came.
I thought for sure now I would see a button to just go do the download.
In fact it is more like a puzzle that you get to solve. It told me to go to Windows Update and do a bunch of incantations.
This struck me as completely odd. Why should I have to go somewhere else and do a scan to download moviemaker?
So I went to Windows update. Windows Update decides I need to download a bunch of controls. (Not) just once but multiple times where I get to see weird dialog boxes.
Doesn't Windows update know some key to talk to Windows?
Then I did the scan. This took quite some time and I was told it was critical for me to download 17megs of stuff.
This is after I was told we were doing delta patches to things but instead just to get 6 things that are labeled in the SCARIEST possible way I had to download 17meg.
So I did the download. That part was fast. Then it wanted to do an install. This took 6 minutes and the machine was so slow I couldn't use it for anything else during this time.
What the heck is going on during those 6 minutes? That is crazy. This is after the download was finished.
Then it told me to reboot my machine. Why should I do that? I reboot every night -- why should I reboot at that time?
So I did the reboot because it INSISTED on it. Of course that meant completely getting rid of all my Outlook state.
So I got back up and running and went to Windows Update again. I forgot why I was in Windows Update at all since all I wanted was to get Moviemaker.
So I went back to Microsoft.com and looked at the instructions. I have to click on a folder called WindowsXP. Why should I do that? Windows Update knows I am on Windows XP.
What does it mean to have to click on that folder? So I get a bunch of confusing stuff but sure enough one of them is Moviemaker.
So I do the download. The download is fast but the Install takes many minutes. Amazing how slow this thing is.
At some point I get told I need to go get Windows Media Series 9 to download.
So I decide I will go do that. This time I get dialogs saying things like "Open" or "Save". No guidance in the instructions which to do. I have no clue which to do.
The download is fast and the install takes 7 minutes for this thing.
So now I think I am going to have Moviemaker. I go to my add/remove programs place to make sure it is there.
It is not there.
What is there? The following garbage is there. Microsoft Autoupdate Exclusive test package, Microsoft Autoupdate Reboot test package, Microsoft Autoupdate testpackage1. Microsoft AUtoupdate testpackage2, Microsoft Autoupdate Test package3.
Someone decided to trash the one part of Windows that was usable? The file system is no longer usable. The registry is not usable. This program listing was one sane place but now it is all crapped up.
But that is just the start of the crap. Later I have listed things like Windows XP Hotfix see Q329048 for more information. What is Q329048? Why are these series of patches listed here? Some of the patches just things like Q810655 instead of saying see Q329048 for more information.
What an absolute mess.
Moviemaker is just not there at all.
So I give up on Moviemaker and decide to download the Digital Plus Package.
I get told I need to go enter a bunch of information about myself.
I enter it all in and because it decides I have mistyped something I have to try again. Of course it has cleared out most of what I typed.
I try (typing) the right stuff in 5 times and it just keeps clearing things out for me to type them in again.
So after more than an hour of craziness and making my programs list garbage and being scared and seeing that Microsoft.com is a terrible website I haven't run Moviemaker and I haven't got the plus package.
The lack of attention to usability represented by these experiences blows my mind. I thought we had reached a low with Windows Network places or the messages I get when I try to use 802.11. (don't you just love that root certificate message?)
When I really get to use the stuff I am sure I will have more feedback.
Bugmeister's last will and testament.
(Via Gizmodo via Slashdot)
Supreme Court: There is a right to own guns
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
One suspects the wonks are making too much of those they must call "Obamacons", in the idiot manner of "metrosexuals". True Gen. Fogbound isn't a conservative, and we'd argue Hole-in-the-Bagel isn't a Republican. Moreover most of these people aren't going to vote for The Messiah. The fact is after fourteen years the GOP is rubble and ashes. Now we await another eyeball-rolling time of a one-party democratic state, which will inevitably end in corruption and ennui, as did the Republicans'.
(Via the TWXSTERS)
(Via the TWXSTERS)
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
I finally got around to seeing that fake VIRAL video, and while it's nice to know PEPSICO and its ULTRA-PC CEO have time enough on their hands to dream up some stupid stunts I find it troubling. Not the stunt itself, which is clearly minor-league compared to, say, Mr. Middle-Finger of yore; but if Indira or whatever her name is can harmlessly lie the true believers of THE TANTRUM TWINS and all their parasites can harmfully lie. This is just another glorified example of yentaism, the relentless spreading of half-truths of which the Web has become the most successful exponent in history, which has already proved the undoing of too many, and could if bad enough prove the undoing of us all.
AP NEWSALERT!!!!!
WASHINGTON (AP) -- President Bush says Friday's election in Zimbabwe appears to "be a sham" [sic]
Even HE knows?
WASHINGTON (AP) -- President Bush says Friday's election in Zimbabwe appears to "be a sham" [sic]
Even HE knows?
In news of "jurisprudence", the Nine Fingers were one digit away from ruling Louisiana's death penalty for child rape constitutional.
But in good news for con-SER-va-tives, they lowered ExxonMobil's fine from the Valdez spill.
And in GREAT news for GEKKO KUDLOWs, New York's high fingers dismissed four charges against Dick "Too Little" Grasso. Excessive CEO compensation is NOT against the law!
But in good news for con-SER-va-tives, they lowered ExxonMobil's fine from the Valdez spill.
And in GREAT news for GEKKO KUDLOWs, New York's high fingers dismissed four charges against Dick "Too Little" Grasso. Excessive CEO compensation is NOT against the law!
George Carlin hosted the very first episode of SNL on Oct. 11, 1975. NBC will honor him by airing that premiere episode this weekend while HBO plans on playing specials of more than 30 years of his comedy shows starting this week....
According to a transcript of the show available here, Mr. Carlin "wanted to wear a t-shirt, but the network wanted him to wear a suit. As a compromise, Carlin wore a vest and jacket over his t-shirt, and hosted the show while reportedly stoned out of his mind."
A very apt honor.
According to a transcript of the show available here, Mr. Carlin "wanted to wear a t-shirt, but the network wanted him to wear a suit. As a compromise, Carlin wore a vest and jacket over his t-shirt, and hosted the show while reportedly stoned out of his mind."
A very apt honor.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Warning to airline travelers: Expect to pay more for customer service, receive less
What's less than zero?
What's less than zero?
Here THE CONSPIRACY had this wonderful gold mine called the DVD, and through its unique alchemy -- such as doing the WKRP on The Fugitive -- has not only turned the gold to tin it may have taught the customers to stop shelling out money for TV shows altogether. Between the seclusion of un-PC cartoons and former rock superstars and other pea-brained musicians throwing tantrums there are already enough reasons for the fans to resent the biz -- as if its continuing excretion of genius isn't enough.
One-and-a-half-stars on Amazon.com, and it's been out two weeks. NUF SAID.
One-and-a-half-stars on Amazon.com, and it's been out two weeks. NUF SAID.
Audit: Dems, liberals passed over for Justice jobs
1. Democrats would do the SAME THING. 2. When Democrats do the same thing news hacks won't try to win the P-Ulitzer over it. 3. Both parties and their respective apologists STINK.
1. Democrats would do the SAME THING. 2. When Democrats do the same thing news hacks won't try to win the P-Ulitzer over it. 3. Both parties and their respective apologists STINK.
A woman married eleven times to seven men so she could write a book?
Let's hope there isn't a sequel.
Let's hope there isn't a sequel.
Monday, June 23, 2008
AP NEWSALERT!!!!!
UNITED NATIONS (AP) -- UN Security council condemns Zimbabwe's government over `campaign of violence' [sic]
Now maybe you can go and -- pass sanctions on yourself.
UNITED NATIONS (AP) -- UN Security council condemns Zimbabwe's government over `campaign of violence' [sic]
Now maybe you can go and -- pass sanctions on yourself.
New Sanctions for Zimbabwe Likely as Opposition Quits
And will they as effective as sanctions on...oh, never mind.
And will they as effective as sanctions on...oh, never mind.
TNT, Acura Start with Blank Slate
And if they use all that money and air time right they could turn it in to the televised equivalent of the Los Angeles River.
And if they use all that money and air time right they could turn it in to the televised equivalent of the Los Angeles River.
More brilliance from the Kinsley Memorial Web Site:
technology
June 23, 2008, 4:10 PM ET
Victoria's Circuit
Harnessing the untapped power of breast motion.June 23, 2008, 4:10 PM ET
A reason The Lord may win: Stuck between a real liberal who fakes and a so-so conservative who fakes, people may choose the real liberal, thinking He's the real thing.
And speaking of innovation, GE BANCORP's putting the GAMES on a downloading platform. BUT:
Users must have Microsoft Windows Vista to use the service, which runs on the operating system's Media Center. According to Microsoft, about 100 million people have Vista.
What about those of us who don't want it?
Users must have Microsoft Windows Vista to use the service, which runs on the operating system's Media Center. According to Microsoft, about 100 million people have Vista.
What about those of us who don't want it?
If only we (and not Slashdot's dweebs) had found this first: a eulogy for BuckyBall:
Fuller’s schemes often had the hallucinatory quality associated with science fiction (or mental hospitals). [!!!!!]
AND:
In 1994, Stewart Brand, the founding editor of the “Whole Earth Catalog” and an early, self-described dome “propagandist,” called geodesics a “massive, total failure”:
Fuller’s schemes often had the hallucinatory quality associated with science fiction (or mental hospitals). [!!!!!]
AND:
In 1994, Stewart Brand, the founding editor of the “Whole Earth Catalog” and an early, self-described dome “propagandist,” called geodesics a “massive, total failure”:
Domes leaked, always. The angles between the facets could never be sealed successfully. If you gave up and tried to shingle the whole damn thing—dangerous process, ugly result—the nearly horizontal shingles on top still took in water. The inside was basically one big room, impossible to subdivide, with too much space wasted up high. The shape made it a whispering gallery that broadcast private sounds to everyone.NUF SAID.
More confirmation of polls' uselessness:
The most reputable company in America: Google, which toppled Microsoft from the top perch in the 2007 Harris Interactive Reputation Quotient study released today -- and sent it tumbling all the way down to No. 10.
1. Just because everybody uses something that makes it good? 2. Why NOW?
"Google is the perfect example showing reputation does not correlate with ad spending," said Robert Fronk, senior VP-senior consultant, reputation strategy, at Harris Interactive.
Well, in a certain way, they got that right.
The most reputable company in America: Google, which toppled Microsoft from the top perch in the 2007 Harris Interactive Reputation Quotient study released today -- and sent it tumbling all the way down to No. 10.
1. Just because everybody uses something that makes it good? 2. Why NOW?
"Google is the perfect example showing reputation does not correlate with ad spending," said Robert Fronk, senior VP-senior consultant, reputation strategy, at Harris Interactive.
Well, in a certain way, they got that right.
I'm sorry too, Romy, that TV news hacks can't expose more miscreants, but the sad fact is such stories have the taint of exploding pickups and superscripts, and they also have the taint of bias (as we will readily assume the hacks will only go after conservative miscreants) -- but because you hacks have to tell your truth is one reason we can't trust you, and because we can't trust you you've pulled the rug out from under your own most necessary endeavors.
To Crown a Copyright Czar
...is to crown the public, and it won't stop Chinese or Russians or Bulgarians from pilfering our product as usual.
...is to crown the public, and it won't stop Chinese or Russians or Bulgarians from pilfering our product as usual.
George Carlin, one of the comedians who made it possible for standup to use dirty words in inverse proportion to its laughs, has died. RIP.
Interesting: The TWXSTERS do a St. Timothy on the domestic home page, but turn to International -- where is it?
I think the International page has the right idea.
Interesting: The TWXSTERS do a St. Timothy on the domestic home page, but turn to International -- where is it?
I think the International page has the right idea.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
An astonishing admission from a con-SER-va-tive source:
Wall Street aristocrats and heroes can easily morph into con men.
Also they can be "bunglers" who are "abjectly stupid about shareholders’ and customers’ money". Gekko Kudlow must call for a boycott of City Journal!
Wall Street aristocrats and heroes can easily morph into con men.
Also they can be "bunglers" who are "abjectly stupid about shareholders’ and customers’ money". Gekko Kudlow must call for a boycott of City Journal!
Wonks are making a big thing about The Lord and his campaign-financing flip-flop. Sorry, when push comes to shove, the hacks will shove us as usual.
Miami, all day and all night
Great beaches, nightlife, culture and eats make for a hot, hip and happening vacation in Miami.
Hasn't the nightlife been a little dark there lately?
Great beaches, nightlife, culture and eats make for a hot, hip and happening vacation in Miami.
Hasn't the nightlife been a little dark there lately?
“Forty years ago, publishers had a pretty high standard for who should write books,” the historian Michael Beschloss, who is based in Washington, said in a telephone interview. “There were fewer books published. You had better possess some literary ability.”
Who needs literary ability to write a memoir?
Who needs literary ability to write a memoir?