Posted 11:58 AM by Gene

Somebody's put something in the water at LALA:

Preview review: 'Burlesque,' Christina Aguilera's first (and last?) act

We are now following this masterwork closely: it promises to be the greatest film since Giggly -- er, Gigli.

And THEN we came across THIS:

Preview review: 'Yogi Bear' may be a sandwich short of a full picnic basket

This is the same rag that employs MOGUL'S FRIEND, who thinks MOVIES ARE BETTER THAN EVER?!?!?

Posted 8:33 AM by Gene

How apt that the king of a company that makes half its profits from overpriced printer cartridges should abdicate his throne for faking some expense-account numbers -- and how apt that the company's board should richly reward him for it.

HP's customers thank you, Mark Hurd!

Posted 8:31 AM by Gene

Speaking of tolerant, the more we must encounter the incompetent doofus Ah-NULT the more we wish he had been the Democrat he so plainly aspires to be.

Back to the movees!

Posted 8:07 AM by Gene

We are gratified to see the young woman horribly disfigured by people toward whom we should be TOLERANT will have reconstructive surgery here, as we hoped; now to restore the rest of womanhood defiled by these PC HEROES.

Posted 11:57 AM by Gene

11.5 years to hit pre-recession job levels: study

This is the Brookings Institution (or Institute, as SLIME's site must put it), and it no doubt said it to engender national feelings of self-pity and stimulus demands. Nonetheless it is too clear the DECISIVE LEADERSHIP OF HIS OMNIPOTENCE probably won't help.

Posted 11:21 AM by Gene

We shouldn't harp on this -- BUT:

Harman shares drop 10% after results

And KAPLAN, INC. down OVER SEVEN PERCENT!!!!!

These things wouldn't be related, would they?

Posted 11:16 AM by Gene

EXASPERATING:

There are myriad reasons for the shifts, often called "onshoring" or "reshoring." Chinese wages and shipping costs have risen sharply in the past few years while U.S. salaries have stayed flat, or in some cases, fallen in the recession. Meanwhile, U.S. manufacturers have been frustrated by the sometimes poor quality of goods made by foreign contractors, theft of their intellectual property and long product-delivery cycles that make them less responsive to customer demand.

But still and all, they saved enough money to pay the CEOs NINE DIGITS!

Still, says Jim Campbell, CEO of GE's appliance unit: "The biggest difference is the U.S. is in the game now."

It might have helped if LEGENDARY WELCH and COMPANY hadn't taken America OUT OF THE GAME.

Posted 8:08 AM by Gene

One of the great lyricists, Sammy Cahn, is doing a musical, and our favorite Branson East columnist Mike says the songs are the "stars of the show".

It may not help though that Sammy died seventeen years ago.

Posted 11:17 PM by Gene

This sort of partisan screaming reminds us that KAPLAN, INC. went below $400 today (it recovered, dammit), which makes us hope this is just the beginning.

On the other hand Perfesser Shafer laughs at SID!!!!!, as well he should.

P. S.

The Kaplan admissions representative falsely stated that the college was accredited by the same agency that accredits Harvard University and the University of Florida.

Isn't The Daily Kaplan's newsroom full of Hahvahd graduates?

I wonder if HOWIE HAIRSHIRT will sniff for conflicts of interest -- and whether ROMY will pay the slightest attention to this bamboozling PERIOD. Anyone for a P-ULITZER PRIZE?

Posted 11:03 PM by Gene

In other norts spews we meant to comment on Shaq the other night. Nolan Ryan and Tom Watson stayed competitive well into the geezer years, and the thought of a big lumbering 38-year-old playing b-ball brought a smile to our face -- not because we want to see him make a fool of himself, although the possibility is real, but because he was lucky enough to be able to do it.

Posted 11:00 PM by Gene

"You're washed up, Tiger. Give it up."

Hell he hasn't begun!

Posted 10:46 PM by Gene

"It's gotten to the point where they need to be in all of our decisions. They don't trust us to make good choices on our own."

As a low-level bureaucrat we understand why other bureaucrats may get nitpicky about kids' lemonade stands. We are far more willing to understand why such bureaucrats may fit the stereotype of clueless idiots, and we are exceedingly willing to understand why a great many people would tell them to do an anatomical impossibility.

Well, if this fine young woman doesn't have a future in lemonade selling she might have a future in modeling.

(Via WOLFFMAN!!!!!)

Posted 7:32 PM by Gene

We all know Walmart's BFF wants world domination -- but does it really want to risk a global holocaust so some commenters on a Web site can feel good?

If there's any solace this country gave us lead-painted toys and leads the world in counterfeit goods.

Posted 7:03 PM by Gene

ARCHDaily!



I've got an idea! Let's have thousands of people run around in there like mice!

Posted 6:54 PM by Gene

By now Minnesotans should know: If you want to elect a comedian to Congress, don't elect a comedian.

Posted 3:38 PM by Gene

GAO: 15 for-profit colleges used deceptive recruiting tactics

...Many of the largest for-profit entities were named among the 15 sites targeted by GAO investigators: University of Phoenix, with more than 400,000 students; Argosy University, part of the 136,000-student Education Management Corp.; Kaplan College, part of the 119,000-student Kaplan Higher Education operation owned by [KAPLAN, INC.!!!!!]; and Everest College, part of the 110,000-student Corinthian Colleges. [Incriminating emphasis added]

St. Warren? KAPLAN, INC.? FRAUDULENT?!?!? NEVER!!!!!

The 15 schools investigated were chosen in part because they receive at least 89% of their revenue from federal aid.

I thought St. Warren stood for FREE EN-TER-PRISE!!!!!

(First link via Seeking Alpha)

Posted 1:50 PM by Gene

The next time we liberals ooze self-congratulatory rhapsodic over tolerance, let us imagine a woman in a bikini -- in RIYADH.

Posted 1:40 PM by Gene

Awwww shucks, Bill Ayers, His Omnipotence's mentor -- er, colleague -- er, favorite professor -- er, this guy He really had nothing to do with is retiring.

Now to tell war stories with the gang of the days bomb -- oh wait, that must have been someone else.

Posted 10:51 AM by Gene

What makes me think the average age of THE NEWER! NEW! ZEITGEIST!'s staff will be close to SID!!!!!'s -- not counting SID!!!!!?

Posted 10:49 AM by Gene

We should send a delegation to Hiroshima; thankfully we're not sending Spock, who'd spend the time luxuriating in our wickedness and His superiority.

Posted 10:12 AM by Gene

We have to post this droll bit of SUPERADAM!!!!! hackery in full:

To paraphrase/grossly misrepresent Tolstoy, good movies are all alike, but every bad movie is bad in its own way. Some are nonsensical, others unbelievable; some have terrible character development, poor acting, wretched chemistry, plot holes; some have talking animals. But a bad movie's most egregious offense is always, always being boring. One of the most roundly trashed movies of the last decade, the Mariah Carey does A Star Is Born shmushortion [?????] Glitter, is wretched not just because it is middling and hackish — though it is that — but because it will put you to sleep before it will send you into a rage. It is unforgivably dull — a potential camp classic that forgot to bring the camp. In contrast, Burlesque, Christina Aguilera's own version of A Star Is Born, has remembered to supply the camp. Whether this is on purpose, or just the automatic side effect of co-star Cher is unclear, but, well, we will not look a gift Cher in the mouth. Other promising signs include handsome barbacks wearing bowler hats and lots of eye makeup; lame reference to Dancing With the Stars; the basic premise that a girl would dream — dream! — of working at a burlesque club; Cher; Cher; Cher saying things like, "When you are putting on your makeup, you're like an artist, but instead of painting on canvas, you're painting a face." Additionally, there are at least three less campy indications of the movie's potential: the presence of Stanley Tucci, the acknowledgment that Christina Aguilera is not a great dancer, and the baby goose bumps you will get when she finally belts one out.

UPDATE: The trailer got pulled from Youtube, but you can still watch it here.

TRANSLATION: This could put Pepe Le Pew out of business.

Posted 5:09 PM by Gene

Earlier today we went KLUMPH! KLUMPH! KLUMPH! KLUMPH! We always believed that the way the hacks reported the stories they so represented their zeitgeist and their prejudices as to be as palpable as jackboots. The reporting on this story will be full of their zeitgeist, and hence unreadable. But that piece on Spock reminds us how lately hacks have whined after the fact they didn't do their "vetting". Vetting is not in their constitutional charge; SPINNING AND SELLING ARE. And the whole point of 2008 was to get OUR president elected first -- and ask questions later...many of which they haven't even asked yet.

P. S. 1. THE NINTH CIRCUIT and 2. A CONSERVATIVE GAGGLE OF NINE FINGERS that may not be ready to make HISTORY just yet.

Posted 5:07 PM by Gene

If there is a God -- I mean, the God who was God before this age full of GODS -- hackers will infect THE LORD GOD STEVE'S Indulgences with all manner of devils, although His Church can rest assured that His Indulgences CANNOT CONTRACT VIRUSES...because He went to the Mount AND SAID SO!

Posted 5:03 PM by Gene

TRANSLATION: This Spock doesn't even have pointy ears.

(Via WOLFFMAN!!!!!)

Posted 10:30 AM by Gene

SLIME! shows more sense than SID!!!!!, which ain't saying much.

Stock losses will concentrate the mind wonderfully.

(First link via MediaBistro)

Posted 10:24 AM by Gene

Ever since they decided the nooz biz' implosion was somebody else's fault the hacks have sought succor from Uncle Sucker by perhaps going non-profit. Unfortunately, in the case of the extremely noble institution that is Zeitgeist, there's just one little problem:

Even with its depleted finances, Newsweek competes directly for advertising with Time and other newsweeklies, as well as with the three national newspapers. They might file objections with the IRS.

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!!!!!

Posted 9:51 AM by Gene

Iran's supreme leader, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, said today that music is "not compatible" with the values of the Islamic republic, and should not be practised or taught in the country.

How do you like THAT tolerance -- JOECON?

(First link via the usual AHTSJournal)

Posted 9:42 AM by Gene

The Tea Party's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Night HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!! [Joviality added]

Andy and Danny so happily gloating is a good reason they should not lose their jobs now -- but later, when SID!!!!!'s heirs finally decide to run out of money.

Posted 9:24 AM by Gene

KLUMPH! KLUMPH! KLUMPH! KLUMPH!

A good little boy for TINA!!!!! types an article about Congressmen Who Should Be Fired. Democrats control roughly 58 percent of all House seats. Six of the ten Congressmen Who Should Be Fired are Republicans.

KLUMPH! KLUMPH! KLUMPH! KLUMPH!

EM's good little boy Peter discovers how the Republicans can create economic prosperity! Simple: give big tax breaks to big business and the rich.

Six of one! Half-a-dozen of the other! I HATE KNEE JERKS! KLUMPH! KLUMPH! KLUMPH! KLUMPH!

Posted 6:33 PM by Gene

ARCHDaily!

The next time you build a rocket ship don't forget the engine -- and don't have it launch from a dock!

Posted 6:05 PM by Gene

As JOURNOLIST has taught us, when liberals speak of tolerance we'd best look behind us. Honorary Mayor Mike is probably Little Jack Horner today, beaming of His tolerance, but a look at the people who assembled behind Him suggests He may not have been that religiously inclusive, although evidently His thousands of aides were careful to screen for figures who would not be that politically correct. In truth His city's Landmarks Commission did the legally right thing -- the buildings to be demolished have little distinction, except to be old -- but one can't avoid the notion this is an attempt to whitewash 9-11, and too many liberals and hacks have buckets of paint in their hands.

And today we learn His Majesty is making sideways noises through very pliant PR types about running for president again. SHUT UP, HONORARY.

Posted 2:18 PM by Gene

If the DONALD could boast of all the times he's been sued -- he'd be even MORE insufferable?

Posted 1:40 PM by Gene

Saying "I'm very comfortable where I am," Sen. Ben Nelson (D-Neb.) indicated Tuesday he will not switch to the Republican Party — or become an independent.

Posted 10:31 AM by Gene

“What these younger actors are discovering is that the star is arguably less important than the reasons a movie needs to be seen on the big screen versus the small screen. It’s not who’s in it, but why do I need to pay $12 to see this on the big screen.”

A question enough people ask enough times to make a whole industry and its BOX-OFFICE RECORDS!!!!! dubious.

Posted 9:47 AM by Gene

Then there was his searing, sensually graphic staging of Strauss’s “Salome” in 2004, also starring Ms. Mattila, in an uninhibited and vocally blazing account of the title role.

Look Tony, I like the idea of doing the big scene in Salome as (translation) one-woman PR0N, but if you're going to give us a producer of RrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRREGIETHEATRE couldn't you at least have the guts to do it honestly?

CARLOS THE JACKASS!!!!! The wall. THE WALL!!!!!!!!!!

(First link via the usual annoying AHTSJournal)

Posted 9:37 AM by Gene

But oui! Weeth hees bollld posiSHEEON on Afghanistan, and hees marvelous yacht, Jean KerrRRRRY could be ze conshans of ze Zenate!

“There’s a certain sense you get after a while in this business of something called ripeness,” he said.

And then there's a certain sense you get after a while that something ripe may go rotten -- but you NEVER sense that in the BELTWAY -- or ZE ZENATE.

Posted 9:07 AM by Gene

See, if it weren't E. J., one of those ultra-partisans of any stripe who wouldn't tell the truth if the Lord God held a gun to his head, we could believe GUVMENT MAY have had something to do with the auto biz' "comeback", but keep in mind WE still own a big chunk of GUVMENT MOTORS, and we won't be buying 17 million cars a year "anytime soon".

Posted 8:13 PM by Gene

YES, MR. GINGRICH AND MS. PALIN, THERE IS A CULTURAL-POLITICAL OFFENSIVE AFOOT TO UNDERMINE OUR CIVILIZATION!!!!! AND YOU'RE LEADING IT!!!!!!!!!! [Cultural-political overemphasis and edit added]

SID! Bill Saletan. BILL SALETAN!!!!! HE'S your new CENTRIST EDITOR!!!!!

Posted 7:47 PM by Gene

One is expected to say Mitch Miller destroyed pop music. In fact he didn't do too badly with it given what he had to work with. When he came to A&R power the glorious jazz age had ended, retreating into holes in the wall, and all the songwriters seemed to be writing were novelties. With his imperfect commercial sense Miller had lots of his acts record novelties, including a few who weren't worthy of it, like Rosemary Clooney and Jo Stafford; he chased Ol' Blue out of Columbia with a dog. But there was great ferment beyond and beneath the major labels, who largely refused to see it. And Miller could see it; he tried signing Elvis but RCA spent more. And he did introduce superb talents like Tony Bennett. Some might conjure up a schlock act but here too Miller beats his critics; for many over 50 he is a fond memory with his TV sing-alongs. One can mock Mitch Miller but in the end the critics only mock themselves.

P. S. on 8/3/2010 at 5:59 p. m. This blogger comprehensively whacks and chops and slices the KLUMPH! KLUMPH! KLUMPH! KLUMPH! of bigmedia show-biz and cultural groupthink, a rather profound reason our culture STINKS.

Posted 12:46 PM by Gene

The rich husband of a Democratic Congresspoop is the new publisher of Zeitgeist -- for as long as his vanity can afford it.

(Via HENRY HONEST!)

Posted 9:00 AM by Gene

Iran's Ahmadinejad calls for TV debate with Obama

Who'd bow at the end?

Posted 8:52 AM by Gene

Zakaria: Raise My Taxes, Mr. President!

Yes, do it, Mr. President! If anyone deserves 100% taxation it's CHICKEN ZAKARIA.

Meantime Folio suggests the worst thing that could happen to Zeitgeist is "maintaining the status quo". But isn't that Zeitgeist's middle name?

(Second link via MediaBistro)

Posted 8:50 AM by Gene

SLIME may waste more money on SELIGISM!

If SLIMEDOM were a PUBLICLY-HELD COMPANY.... (Pffffffffffffffffft!)

Posted 8:43 PM by Gene

ARCHDaily!



A gymnasium!

Well, how were we supposed to know?

It's in WASHINGTON D. C., NATCH -- where they WOULDN'T.

Posted 8:31 PM by Gene

An AWFUL admission from the Crainiacs: Not only is THE SECOND GREATEST POP-CULTURE ACHIEVEMENT OF THE LAST QUARTER-CENTURY not drawing viewers -- it's not making very much money!

Advertisers will "only pay so much" to be in high-quality programs such as "Mad Men," said Kris Magel, exec VP-director of national broadcast at Interpublic Group of Cos.' Initiative, because its [sic] traditional TV reach is limited. "Once that cost hits a ceiling, the network has to make a decision: Can they afford to continue to make the show for the amount of revenue it generates?" he asked. "Sometimes they do, because the halo generated for the network as a whole and its other programs outweighs the expense. And sometimes they can't."

And what happens when the NEWS-HACK-POWERED HALO is so BLINDINGLY BRIGHT you can't see the show and don't want to?

Posted 2:18 PM by Gene

I think I've said something like this before: Government may be less overtly corrupt than before -- certainly our pols should know better than to wave envelopes full of cash at likely targets -- but so much of the machinery of corruption is now so implacably internalized that it may be at least as corrupt as in the Gilded Age. This kind of argument that it's not serves con-SER-va-tives because it allows them to rationalize the huge sums spent on the preservation of broadcasters to spew political lies, not to mention the viper's nest of lobbyists. Anything MB2 can endorse is shady by definition.

Posted 9:48 AM by Gene

A story like this makes us realize not only is yours truly puny, he is virtually non-existent. But then so many of us live waking deaths. Of course it helps to have some wherewithal to engage in a seven-year sea voyage around the world, but how many of us could barter for our provisions? And how many of us could bear the same company day in and day out for seven years? This is a truly remarkable family and I profoundly envy them, and their intense spirit further underlines that most of us (yours truly definitely included) lack a true will to live.

Posted 9:47 AM by Gene

Well ALL RIGHT, it wasn't over the top, but we expect little from boomers and less from Mr. and Ms. Slickster, hence our irritation.

And now we never ever ever have to talk about this AGAIN.