THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
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Saturday, March 06, 2004
OOOOOOOOOOOOH, I think the knee-jerk hard core CONSERVATIVES are going to get MAD: St. Warren of Buffett wants COMPANIES to pay HIGHER TAXES!
Of course HE (I mean He, of course) can afford it -- being in THE INSURANCE BUSINESS.
Of course HE (I mean He, of course) can afford it -- being in THE INSURANCE BUSINESS.
I see GOOGLEBLOGGER's got the HICCUPS again!
Hey GOOGLE, where's that IPO you've been threatening us with -- got caught in the HICCUPS?
Hey GOOGLE, where's that IPO you've been threatening us with -- got caught in the HICCUPS?
By the way, when are THE MEL's boys going to start inventing MIRACLES? When the BEEEEEE-O goes down? (As it appears to be.)
O.J. Simpson said he has been watching high-profile criminal cases such as Michael Jackson's and has plenty of advice for celebrities in trouble. (front-page hed)
For one thing, GET GOOD LAWYERS.
For one thing, GET GOOD LAWYERS.
I'm waiting for the IDEAL Larry "$140 Million is a Pittance for Such Executive Greatness" Kudlow column: he credits economic recovery to -- P. R. MEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dippity-DO! weeps crocodile tears because mean ol' Dubya's "shortchanging" them on their protective gear.
Or was his hair melting?
Or was his hair melting?
I know some people who'll cheer at Mickey D's news: the AD DEPARTMENT. Now they can REALLY make TV unwatchable!
The Feds are looking into the NEA. Want to bet NEWS HACKS discover this and turn it into a WITCH HUNT? TEACHERS UNDER EVERY BED!!!!! While politics can never be ruled out of such cases, neither can another thing: the incompetence of many teachers, sanctioned by a bloated PC union.
Star Trek Icon Condemns Hollywood's 'Violence Against Women'
Translation: His career has been stuck in neutral lately.
At least it wasn't William Shatner.
(Referred from Google News and TrekWeb.com, for what that's worth.)
Translation: His career has been stuck in neutral lately.
At least it wasn't William Shatner.
(Referred from Google News and TrekWeb.com, for what that's worth.)
BOB VILA SPAMS! NYAAAAAAAAAH NYAH NYAH NYAAAAAAAAAH NYAH!
You don't supposed he could be charged with something, do you? He's the Martha Stewart of the hammer.
You don't supposed he could be charged with something, do you? He's the Martha Stewart of the hammer.
Friday, March 05, 2004
I took it at face value Karl Rove was behind those 9/11 ads, not thinking NEWS HACKS ARE ALWAYS RIGHT, and will ONLY CITE THOSE PEOPLE WHO CAN PROVE THEY'RE ALWAYS RIGHT. I suppose my first impulse was to imagine this was just like the visit to the aircraft carrier, which MADE THE PROFESSOR WINCE. But the Ptolemys of the news will campaign for Democrats (and those rare Republicans who think like Democrats) until the universe in which they're the center collapses into one big black hole, and even then they'll blame it on Republicans.
The only real question is, HOW WILL NEWS HACKS RIG THE ELECTION THIS TIME?
The only real question is, HOW WILL NEWS HACKS RIG THE ELECTION THIS TIME?
Excellent news for professional college basketball:
Ratings aren't exactly on the upswing, either. When CBS started broadcasting regular-season college games in 1981-82, it got a 5.5 rating. It's been headed the wrong way ever since. This season currently is at a 22-year low with a 1.7 rating.
OR:
Some try to sell what a great season it is because Stanford and St. Joseph's could enter the tournament undefeated!
Are you actually listening to yourselves? How did Egghead U. become the No. 1 team in the nation?
And St. Joseph's? Isn't that the fifth-best team in Philadelphia? St. Joseph's has 3,800 students. It should be playing Cal Lutheran.
OooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!!
Ratings aren't exactly on the upswing, either. When CBS started broadcasting regular-season college games in 1981-82, it got a 5.5 rating. It's been headed the wrong way ever since. This season currently is at a 22-year low with a 1.7 rating.
OR:
Some try to sell what a great season it is because Stanford and St. Joseph's could enter the tournament undefeated!
Are you actually listening to yourselves? How did Egghead U. become the No. 1 team in the nation?
And St. Joseph's? Isn't that the fifth-best team in Philadelphia? St. Joseph's has 3,800 students. It should be playing Cal Lutheran.
OooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!!
'The Color Purple' Turned Into Musical
I'd like to see a musical of Mein Kampf. Oh. Mel Brooks did it. It was called a masterpiece.
I'd like to see a musical of Mein Kampf. Oh. Mel Brooks did it. It was called a masterpiece.
Charles the K HATES it because he's Jewish. "Father" Greeley HATES it because he's liberal. NewsMAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! is renaming itself MELMANIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What people bloviate about THE GREATEST MOVIE OF ALL TIME says more about themselves than about the movie.
And another enduring masterwork heads to the Great White Way, sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Well, at least Rodgers and Hammerstein's estates own most of the songs.
Well, at least Rodgers and Hammerstein's estates own most of the songs.
BackStage is touting a "building boom" in the New York stage, then you look at the capacities: 250, 99, 425, 75, 499, 155. Theater remains a tourist trap on Broadway and an irrelevance elsewhere.
Thursday, March 04, 2004
Thirty months after four commandeered airliners shocked the American public by killing thousands, journalists continue dying in an open-ended, ill-defined “war”....
I! I! I! ME!! ME!! ME!! WE!!! WE!!! WE!!! The whole universe revolves around YOU NEWS HACKS. It would never do to suggest maybe 9/11 was about more than "JOURNALISTS" dying. But you're our modern-day Ptolemys, and you can't see the stars from your fog-bound cloud-covered EARTH.
Such hackery. "Airliners shocked." They had minds of their own? "The American public." The not so subtle implication of this bad breath is that either the rest of the world had reason not to care, or we had it coming. What HEAD LICE. I want to know what papers the idiots who wrote this work for.
I! I! I! ME!! ME!! ME!! WE!!! WE!!! WE!!! The whole universe revolves around YOU NEWS HACKS. It would never do to suggest maybe 9/11 was about more than "JOURNALISTS" dying. But you're our modern-day Ptolemys, and you can't see the stars from your fog-bound cloud-covered EARTH.
Such hackery. "Airliners shocked." They had minds of their own? "The American public." The not so subtle implication of this bad breath is that either the rest of the world had reason not to care, or we had it coming. What HEAD LICE. I want to know what papers the idiots who wrote this work for.
If Wild-Eyed John the War Hero sees THIS he'll never stop hugging himself.
But as I said, I think Dippity-DO!'s picking a senator.
But as I said, I think Dippity-DO!'s picking a senator.
Few things are more insulting than junk mail damaged by the Postal Service.
The problem with this chart (aside from being hard to decipher like so many art-department projects) is that it's from BOZELL.ORG, and with any outfit whose members PRAISE GOD FOR P. R. MEL it's tough to know what their definition of a bad word is.
Canadian Documentary Shows Bin Laden as Family Man
Family values bleeeeeeeeeah....
OR:
"He has issues with his wife, and he has issues with his kids, financial issues, you know, the kids aren't listening, the kids aren't doing this and that...."
NOTHING compared with the "ISSUES" he'll have with the DEVIL -- or 72 Helen Thomases.
Family values bleeeeeeeeeah....
OR:
"He has issues with his wife, and he has issues with his kids, financial issues, you know, the kids aren't listening, the kids aren't doing this and that...."
NOTHING compared with the "ISSUES" he'll have with the DEVIL -- or 72 Helen Thomases.
Someone at St. John's was doing illegally what someday the hired help at collegiate sports factories may do legally: PLAYING FOR PAY.
These guys are already professionals, and they don't learn anything. Why not just drop the pretenses and pay them?
These guys are already professionals, and they don't learn anything. Why not just drop the pretenses and pay them?
About another wonder of the age, gene therapy (you must read the whole thing):
One technique had shown promise. A harmless retrovirus was used to transport the repair gene into the body. A virus infects lots of cells on its own. So it embeds the reformed gene that way. But there is this great difficulty: The body's immune system sees the virus as a foreigner and quickly wipes it out. End of treatment. But with a rare genetic defect that cripples the immune system itself, the treatment did seem to work. Some children in a Paris hospital were claimed cured by this method. The New York Times reported it as the "first success of gene therapy."
Two years later, some of the treated children who were thought cured developed leukemia. On the Washington Post's front page the headline read: "Dream Unmet 50 Years After DNA Milestone. Gene Therapy Debacle Casts Pall on Field." The news came on the 50th anniversary of the double helix.
The idea that the instructions needed to build fantastically complex organisms are contained in a simple linear code appealed to scientists for various reasons. The problem could be digitized. "Errors" in the genome could be found by computers; and perhaps also corrected by them. But almost certainly that is not going to work out.
Yes, I think we can leave life to scientists.
One technique had shown promise. A harmless retrovirus was used to transport the repair gene into the body. A virus infects lots of cells on its own. So it embeds the reformed gene that way. But there is this great difficulty: The body's immune system sees the virus as a foreigner and quickly wipes it out. End of treatment. But with a rare genetic defect that cripples the immune system itself, the treatment did seem to work. Some children in a Paris hospital were claimed cured by this method. The New York Times reported it as the "first success of gene therapy."
Two years later, some of the treated children who were thought cured developed leukemia. On the Washington Post's front page the headline read: "Dream Unmet 50 Years After DNA Milestone. Gene Therapy Debacle Casts Pall on Field." The news came on the 50th anniversary of the double helix.
The idea that the instructions needed to build fantastically complex organisms are contained in a simple linear code appealed to scientists for various reasons. The problem could be digitized. "Errors" in the genome could be found by computers; and perhaps also corrected by them. But almost certainly that is not going to work out.
Yes, I think we can leave life to scientists.
But the wind wisped the other way, and THE GREATEST RIGHT EVER FOUND IN THE CONSTITUTION WAS SAVED.
No thinking person can respect the Nine Fingers anymore.
No thinking person can respect the Nine Fingers anymore.
And speaking thereof, THAT PIONEER TARZAN, THAT TARZAN TO OUT-TARZAN ALL TARZANS, LUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHVES IT.
When he saw it he was probably thinking how to get back at those EEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL Jew -- McCAINS.
When he saw it he was probably thinking how to get back at those EEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL Jew -- McCAINS.
We're trying to keep children away from R-rated violent movies that last 90 minutes, but in too many basements and kids' bedrooms in America, children are role-playing murderers for hours on end, ad infinitum.
Problem is, BRENT, movies and videogames will get MORE violent -- no thanks to THE GREATEST MOVIE EVER MADE. (RIGHT, Brent?)
Problem is, BRENT, movies and videogames will get MORE violent -- no thanks to THE GREATEST MOVIE EVER MADE. (RIGHT, Brent?)
Sorry BUZZ, looks like that "freight train" is comin'.
OR:
"NAB does not support the bill as written, but we hear the call of legislators and are committed to taking voluntary action to address this issue," NAB president and CEO Edward Fritts said.
Pffh-hh-hh-hh!
To be sure there are lots of hypocrites on this issue, starting with the IDIOTS of CHEAP CHANNEL. But there are lots of CRETINS on the AIR, not starting with HOWIE.
OR:
"NAB does not support the bill as written, but we hear the call of legislators and are committed to taking voluntary action to address this issue," NAB president and CEO Edward Fritts said.
Pffh-hh-hh-hh!
To be sure there are lots of hypocrites on this issue, starting with the IDIOTS of CHEAP CHANNEL. But there are lots of CRETINS on the AIR, not starting with HOWIE.
Wednesday, March 03, 2004
Bonds did make a statement of sorts. As he walked toward the showers after Tuesday's workout, past a table at which Willie Mays was sitting, Bonds said presumably about himself, "The most wanted man in America." He then raised his fist, a la Tommie Smith and John Carlos at the 1968 Olympics, and said, "Black power."
STEROIDS = BLACK POWER! DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH DA DUT DUT!
STEROIDS = BLACK POWER! DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH DA DUT DUT!
Roy's victory in the court of shareholder opinion may be a Pyrrhic one: either EisnerCorp (we may have to call it ESPNCorp from now on) gets swallowed up by Concast and becomes a business quagmire, or it gets broken up into pieces and loses all corporate identity. The idea of Uncle Walt magically returning to reclaim his kingdom in the person of his impersonator-nephew may not work out exactly as Roy planned.
Sen. Polyester Lawyer is giving up a hopeless run for reelection to pursue a hopeless run for the White House.
Where are my eighty quintaoctokazillion HITS?
Where are my eighty quintaoctokazillion HITS?
Analysis: Dems just want to win (front-page hed)
No, they just want to LOSE. And these clowns get six and seven digits for THIS?
No, they just want to LOSE. And these clowns get six and seven digits for THIS?
PREDICTION: 'DO! picks a fellow Senator. I won't be foolish enough to guess which.
W-w-w-w-w-w-w-we w-w-w-ouldn't b-b-b-b-b-bomb -- M-M-M-M-M-M-MUSLIMS!!!!! (Even if they are INFIDELS.)
Sure, pal, sure.
Sure, pal, sure.
Dippity-DO! has an in with the Times!
Nah, it won't influence coverage. We know who should win already.
Nah, it won't influence coverage. We know who should win already.
Figures, some Iranians were in on those awful bombings.
There do seem to be a lot of Iranians who sole purpose is to go BWAHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHHH!!!!!
There do seem to be a lot of Iranians who sole purpose is to go BWAHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHHH!!!!!
BUZZ! BUZZ!!!!! LOOK WHO'S GOING TO DESTROY THE REPUBLIC -- THE SOURCE OF ALL EVIL, TOM DELAY!!!!!
OR:
Mayall hays made thuh graytest mooovie uv all TAHM!
OR:
Mayall hays made thuh graytest mooovie uv all TAHM!
NewsMAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! knots a world-record ideological pretzel: IT PROCLAIMS A MUSLIM A HERO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Honest, Carl Limburger -- pardon, you're not honest.
Honest, Carl Limburger -- pardon, you're not honest.
[U]nless PSYCHO stages a comeback, this is a two-horse race, and will be decided long before the convention -- just the way news hacks always want it. Me, I'm sticking with Dippity-DO!
Where are my eighty sextaquintuplezillion hits?
Where are my eighty sextaquintuplezillion hits?
"Saddam was a mass murderer -- and so was Pol Pot."
And leftists helped bring the one to power and hoped the other would stay on.
And leftists helped bring the one to power and hoped the other would stay on.
BUZZ is EXCITED!!!!! because Zell Miller wants to start a COUNCIL OF DECENCY!!!!! that would tell broadcasters what they CAN'T SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We already have a Council of Indecency. Its members are RUPERT!!!!!!!!!, Sumner, Zon, King Richard and MICKEYMOUSE NIXON. Its members won't show anything that doesn't make money.
We already have a Council of Indecency. Its members are RUPERT!!!!!!!!!, Sumner, Zon, King Richard and MICKEYMOUSE NIXON. Its members won't show anything that doesn't make money.
Tuesday, March 02, 2004
I see (from reading Tom Shales's evisceration of the Oscars®) that United has brought back George, which tells us two things: 1. That music will live forever, and 2. Jingle writers couldn't come up with memorable stuff if their lives depended on it.
Lawyer says Tyco exec admitted $12.5 million bonus was 'mistake'
I'll bet it wan't a mistake at the time, duhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
I'll bet it wan't a mistake at the time, duhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Michael Jackson's Phone Records Seized
What can the authorities glean from the records of a man who does most of his conversations in single-syllable words? (Except to his lawyers and accountants.)
What can the authorities glean from the records of a man who does most of his conversations in single-syllable words? (Except to his lawyers and accountants.)
For today, add to that Venn diagram -- GUN NUTS!
I love Venn diagrams. Here's another example: Tantrum throwers...young children...members of Free Republic...members of Democratic Underground.
Across from where I work there's a little deli that every noontime plays MAURY POVICH, and today the thought struck me: IF MAURY FOUND GOD, HE'D BE A GREAT EVANGELIST! He plays to an audience of heathen Tarzans (just like Jerry Springer), and really it isn't much of a leap from Maury's studio to the movie house to a RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD!
Or as Glenn Gould once said, "I believe in God -- Bach's God." (Quoted by -- Terry Teachout sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.)
Or as Glenn Gould once said, "I believe in God -- Bach's God." (Quoted by -- Terry Teachout sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.)
Another Forbes.com quote:
"The sheer ease with which we can produce a superficial image often leads to creative disaster."
-Ansel Adams
I think he was talking about movies.
"The sheer ease with which we can produce a superficial image often leads to creative disaster."
-Ansel Adams
I think he was talking about movies.
I wonder how The Great Stone Face of Annoying Commercials feels about THE TARZANS. He's in a peculiar position: he's Jewish, but he's also -- CONSERVATIVE, and he WORSHIPS NIXON. Which side are you on, Stone Face?
Richard, nobody trusts you because you're such a knee-jerk crybaby screaming pouting whining leftist, so what do you do? You egg on the TARZANS -- by calling their favorite movie "FASCISTIC"! A PLAGUE O' BOTH YOUR HOUSES.
The great Dick Clark, who doesn't look a day over -- 70 (where do people GET these ideas?), has been sued for age discrimination.
PFFH-HH-HH-HH!
PFFH-HH-HH-HH!
Monday, March 01, 2004
The last word:
[W]hat better venue to disrespect moviemaking than the Oscars®? [Registered-trademark symbol added]
[W]hat better venue to disrespect moviemaking than the Oscars®? [Registered-trademark symbol added]
Next from the POP-CULTURE-GENIUS INDUSTRY: Starsky and Hutch. I can't wait zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
OR:
8. Biology.
a. The growing of microorganisms, tissue cells, or other living matter in a specially prepared nutrient medium.
b. Such a growth or colony, as of bacteria.
OR:
8. Biology.
a. The growing of microorganisms, tissue cells, or other living matter in a specially prepared nutrient medium.
b. Such a growth or colony, as of bacteria.
I'm surprised NEWSMAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hasn't put the EXTRAORDINARILY GOOD NEWS ABOUT THE GREATEST MOVIE OF ALL TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! on the TOP of its page every blasted DAY, but then maybe they're hearing about "flying f--ks," Frank Rich's intestines, non-Catholics going to Hell, and Holocaust conspiracy theories too.
I wonder if "Dr." Dobson knows what the word "f--k" MEANS.
P. S. Has anyone noticed these bozos are selling John Wayne's notorious musical blend of bathos and doggerel? It does go well with flying f--ks, doesn't it.
I wonder if "Dr." Dobson knows what the word "f--k" MEANS.
P. S. Has anyone noticed these bozos are selling John Wayne's notorious musical blend of bathos and doggerel? It does go well with flying f--ks, doesn't it.
Excellent! Guess who's buying assets from the corrupt Ahold supermarket firm? THE TERROR OF BENTONVILLE!!!!!
Today, America; tomorrow -- 26 UNIVERSES BWAH-HA-HA-HA!! These guys are the Bill Gateses of retailing.
Today, America; tomorrow -- 26 UNIVERSES BWAH-HA-HA-HA!! These guys are the Bill Gateses of retailing.
After the genuine disgrace of last week's nervous breakdown it appears a few at NRO may be having second thoughts. (If they don't have second thoughts after this they're truly cement-headed.) Kudos to David Frum for a necessary display of conscience.
Sunday, February 29, 2004
And while the TARZANS declare P. R. MEL the THIRD COMING OF CHRIST, and themselves without the slightest doubt that HE'S GONNA LIVE FOREVER, pastors around America confess their humility, and seek forgiveness for the collective sin arising from the buggery of their peers.
John Leo has come close to a reasonable discussion of P. R. MEL from "our side" without the tub-thumping and chest-baring (though he too indulges in that canard about the liberals). But for every such piece approaching reasonableness are a thousand TARZAN YELLS, and some conservatives' reps may never recover.
This story in tomorrow's Quack Healing Monitor is pure cut-and-paste, something Google's computers could assemble. Is it entirely impossible to write on this overdiscussed subject without resorting to cliches (election year Congress posturing blahblahblah) and quoting "experts"? Can't ANYBODY in this business THINK?
I've changed the title of my blog -- slightly, thinking maybe I can attract an extra hit a month that way.
[I]t's very easy to argue with someone else's ideas; it's very hard to argue with a Buick.
And it's impossible to argue with any six- or seven-digit news hack in whom resides all wisdom.
And it's impossible to argue with any six- or seven-digit news hack in whom resides all wisdom.
Last year "everyone" talked about a "renaissance" for the movie musical. Today no one talks about it. Here's more proof our culture can produce things that don't leave a trace.
When you have an onerous tax, don't cut it, STUDY IT. Here in Philly we have a wage tax that will never go away, and in LALALAND they have a business tax. In a nation where right is right (and left is wrong) and left is right (and right is wrong) no one can agree on even fundamentals, and a fundamental is some taxes should be put out in a big field and blown up. "Studied to death" indeed.
A black congresswoman makes a racist remark and the news hacks don't notice. This and the P. R. MEL claptrap from conservatives tell me political intransigence is more firmly embedded in our superiors than ever, and that truth is increasingly a fiction.
And speaking of fiction, MR. SCIENCE FICTION (whoops! Mr. SPECULATIVE Fiction; the sci-fiers get a little antsy about being called HACKS) trots out the four-day-old conservative canard that the libs are HYPOCRITES for hating P. R. MEL's MASTERPIECE. I agree: the same ad-blurb copywriters gushed orgasmic over Pulp Fiction. But hypocrisy cuts both ways: P. R. MEL's most strident defenders screamed their heads off over MS. BOOB. A PLAGUE O' BOTH YOUR HOUSES.
And speaking of fiction, MR. SCIENCE FICTION (whoops! Mr. SPECULATIVE Fiction; the sci-fiers get a little antsy about being called HACKS) trots out the four-day-old conservative canard that the libs are HYPOCRITES for hating P. R. MEL's MASTERPIECE. I agree: the same ad-blurb copywriters gushed orgasmic over Pulp Fiction. But hypocrisy cuts both ways: P. R. MEL's most strident defenders screamed their heads off over MS. BOOB. A PLAGUE O' BOTH YOUR HOUSES.
Translation to this press release: Lots of corporate executives will spend the next two months yelling, "I RUBBED ELBOWS WITH LOTS OF BIG STARS AND YOU DIDN'T!!!!!!!!!!", the companies involved take duplicitous tax breaks (one of the sponsors was Coke), and the "charitable" donations get wasted.
Bill the Entomologist has two ways of making your surfing experience FUN:
1. He prevents you from scrolling for about twenty seconds, and when you try, you get a bar-code effect on the screen; OR
2. He prevents you from scrolling for about thirty seconds, and when you try, the screen divides horizontally two hundred ways, and when you move the cursor over the scroll bar it divvies up further.
WHAT HATH BILL -- er, GOD WROUGHT?
1. He prevents you from scrolling for about twenty seconds, and when you try, you get a bar-code effect on the screen; OR
2. He prevents you from scrolling for about thirty seconds, and when you try, the screen divides horizontally two hundred ways, and when you move the cursor over the scroll bar it divvies up further.
WHAT HATH BILL -- er, GOD WROUGHT?
This week it's STROKES, perhaps as a form of corporate apology.
If it's ANY consolation, MARK, MRS. SLUT's going on a tour. Now if we could get her and MS. BOOB together you'd REALLY have a cover story.
If it's ANY consolation, MARK, MRS. SLUT's going on a tour. Now if we could get her and MS. BOOB together you'd REALLY have a cover story.
One banana-republican gives way (presumably) for another.
The pitiful Haitians stand to be poor and ruled by despots forever, unless someone discovers some magical element we don't know about, or unless American business exports enough jobs there.
The pitiful Haitians stand to be poor and ruled by despots forever, unless someone discovers some magical element we don't know about, or unless American business exports enough jobs there.