THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
Blogroll Me!
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Saturday, December 29, 2007
The TWXSTERS say Mrs. Bhutto's 19-year-old son will be her party's new leader, which suggests the real power will lie somewhere else for a while.
P. S. The TWXSTERS seem to have gotten their "exclusive" from the British foreign secretary.
P. P. S. Or was it the "close family friend" who told Zeitgeist?
Does the kid know?
P. S. The TWXSTERS seem to have gotten their "exclusive" from the British foreign secretary.
P. P. S. Or was it the "close family friend" who told Zeitgeist?
Does the kid know?
John Edwards vowed Saturday that corporate lobbyists would not be allowed to work in his administration, if elected.
But we can be sure this will not keep lobbyists out of the White House, nor will it keep anyone in his administration from quitting to become lobbyists, nor....
Here's a new Polish joke: How many holes does a campaign promise have?
But we can be sure this will not keep lobbyists out of the White House, nor will it keep anyone in his administration from quitting to become lobbyists, nor....
Here's a new Polish joke: How many holes does a campaign promise have?
I was just listening to Fred Astaire singing "It Only Happens When I Dance With You" from Easter Parade, which is on this album, which shares a Web site with this profound masterpiece (which JUNIOR won't issue for several more weeks, despite endless talk of the Os-CAR® -- but genius must take its time, I guess):
JUNO (MUSIC FROM THE MOTION PICTURE), the soundtrack album for the 2007 Fox Searchlight feature film JUNO, blends indie rock stand-outs and classic rock gems to create an engaging musical companion piece to the acclaimed coming-of-age tale. Canadian newcomer Ellen Page, who stars as Juno in what is being hailed as a major breakthrough performance, was actively involved in selecting music for the film.
Among the disc's highlights is The Moldy Peaches track “Anyone Else But You,” which is also reprised by Page and co-star Michael Cera (Arrested Development, Superbad) to close the album. The Moldy Peaches Kimya Dawson is featured solo on several tracks as well, including “So Nice So Smart,” “My Rollercoaster,” “Tire Swing” and “Loose Lips.” Other indie and alt-rock selections include Sonic Youth's “Superstar” and Belle & Sebastian's “Piazza, New York Catcher.”
Classic rock cuts include The Kinks' “A Well Respected Man,” Buddy Holly's “Dearest,” Mott The Hoople's “All The Young Dudes” and The Velvet Underground's “I'm Sticking With You.” In a tip of the hat to the film's underlying theme of transitioning from adolescence to the concerns of the adult world, “All I Want Is You,” from award-winning children's music composer Barry Louis Polisar, opens the eclectic track listing. The soundtrack album was produced by JUNO's director Jason Reitman (Thank You For Smoking), Peter Afterman and Margaret Yen.
But the thrill that comes with spring, when anything can happen -- happens every weekend when MOVIES ARE!!!!! BETTER THAN EVER!
(I am sorry to always harp on that DAMNED IDIOT A. O. but his blithering spew sends me into orbit.)
JUNO (MUSIC FROM THE MOTION PICTURE), the soundtrack album for the 2007 Fox Searchlight feature film JUNO, blends indie rock stand-outs and classic rock gems to create an engaging musical companion piece to the acclaimed coming-of-age tale. Canadian newcomer Ellen Page, who stars as Juno in what is being hailed as a major breakthrough performance, was actively involved in selecting music for the film.
Among the disc's highlights is The Moldy Peaches track “Anyone Else But You,” which is also reprised by Page and co-star Michael Cera (Arrested Development, Superbad) to close the album. The Moldy Peaches Kimya Dawson is featured solo on several tracks as well, including “So Nice So Smart,” “My Rollercoaster,” “Tire Swing” and “Loose Lips.” Other indie and alt-rock selections include Sonic Youth's “Superstar” and Belle & Sebastian's “Piazza, New York Catcher.”
Classic rock cuts include The Kinks' “A Well Respected Man,” Buddy Holly's “Dearest,” Mott The Hoople's “All The Young Dudes” and The Velvet Underground's “I'm Sticking With You.” In a tip of the hat to the film's underlying theme of transitioning from adolescence to the concerns of the adult world, “All I Want Is You,” from award-winning children's music composer Barry Louis Polisar, opens the eclectic track listing. The soundtrack album was produced by JUNO's director Jason Reitman (Thank You For Smoking), Peter Afterman and Margaret Yen.
But the thrill that comes with spring, when anything can happen -- happens every weekend when MOVIES ARE!!!!! BETTER THAN EVER!
(I am sorry to always harp on that DAMNED IDIOT A. O. but his blithering spew sends me into orbit.)
Riots push Pakistan towards political crisis
38 dead in riots is a lot, even by American standards; but we should remember riots on the Sub-Continent are almost a weekly thing. God knows how many thousands have died debating whose religion is better. We said we suspected the Pakistanis might elect to keep calm out of sheer fatigue, and regardless of a few hot spots it seems they have.
By the way, look at the URL for the link above. Hacks can type such heds in their sleep.
(Stratfor link added 12:04 a.m. on 12/30)
38 dead in riots is a lot, even by American standards; but we should remember riots on the Sub-Continent are almost a weekly thing. God knows how many thousands have died debating whose religion is better. We said we suspected the Pakistanis might elect to keep calm out of sheer fatigue, and regardless of a few hot spots it seems they have.
By the way, look at the URL for the link above. Hacks can type such heds in their sleep.
(Stratfor link added 12:04 a.m. on 12/30)
Bhutto's homeland smolders with rage
Original writing. No wonder international news stinks -- though you can't tell given how national news stinks.
Original writing. No wonder international news stinks -- though you can't tell given how national news stinks.
Official: 75% of al-Qaeda in Iraq's network destroyed
Let's hope this worked; we know what the holy cockroaches can do with a quarter.
Let's hope this worked; we know what the holy cockroaches can do with a quarter.
Closing arguments
You've got that right, Politico staff: the pundits and the spinmeisters will decide this election NEXT WEEK.
You've got that right, Politico staff: the pundits and the spinmeisters will decide this election NEXT WEEK.
And elsewhere in the vast world of idle typing, a pop-cultyure cri-TIC insists there's a big market for "family" films -- films, we don't need to guess, like AAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLVIIIIIIIIIIIIN!!!!! This, our pop-cultyure cri-TIC wants us to believe, is an advance for the public. We should point out for starters that Walt Disney died in 1966. Moreover the last twenty years have been littered with "family" movies that were mostly about merchandising (witness anything starring SHREK or the characters of DR. SEUSS) or synergistic tie-ins (like the ROWLINGCORP and LUKE SPIELBERG tentpoles) or glorified grossout comedies. Just because THE CONSPIRACY says something is suitable for kids doesn't mean diddly-squat. If good taste has been split off from quality (and we know what that's done to quality), here we have the kiddie audience split off from both. So now we have three-way dreck. Nor do we forget SAMMY GLICKMAN's boys have been trying to up the ante by pushing more violence into "family" films; the show-biz résumé writers drooled when ROWLINGCORP made its tie-ins more "edgy." Even if we take this flackery on the level it's not flattering that so many parents use the popcorn restaurants for baby-sitting. Meantime we will certainly NOT forget how these toadies helped invent NC-17 in hopes it could destigmatize pornography. When it comes to show-biz the press speaks not with a mere forked tongue but with a complete 32-piece set.
What do rock ad-blurbists do all day? We know what the WIDE-EYED ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIASTS do -- go from one free screening to another, in a daze of worship (actually a daze of mind-numbness, but they don't know -- or care), graffitiing their names above the titles. We imagine it's a little more difficult for a WIDE-EYED ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIAST of recorded...SOUND -- the record biz hasn't been doing much advertising lately. The ASSPRESS's scribbler with the weird name obviously has gotten lots of free records this year, and this is presumably her way to return the favor. Just one problem: ad-blurbists do so many favors we've completely tuned out to them, except to see who can outdo another for idiot praise.
P. S.
Honorable mention:...
"Blackout," Britney Spears (YES, I SAID IT!)
And oh, yes, by the way: Britney’s "Blackout" is at No. 112 on Amazon.com.
The public's said it, too.
P. S.
Honorable mention:...
"Blackout," Britney Spears (YES, I SAID IT!)
And oh, yes, by the way: Britney’s "Blackout" is at No. 112 on Amazon.com.
The public's said it, too.
Cats on patrol in New York's bodegas! Cats on patrol in LALA's police department!
CATS EVERYWHERE!
Not that I mind.
If Dubya had guts, he'd visit Vermont. Maybe his handlers could come up with an excuse, like Calvin Coolidge's birthday. (July 4!) Alas, we all know what Dubya lacks.
Friday, December 28, 2007
"I've been declared dead in this campaign on five or six occasions. I won't refer to a recent movie I saw, but I think I am legend."
You trying out for another CAMEO, Boobs McKeating?
You trying out for another CAMEO, Boobs McKeating?
Historic Low in NYC, Chicago Homicides
This is good news, but it took a lot of money and a lot of policing to create this good news, news that didn't require money and policing before the age of "reliable record keeping", and given guvment's sloth there's no reason the murder rates can't go back up -- as other cities prove again and again. We just hope this vigilance isn't a sometime thing.
This is good news, but it took a lot of money and a lot of policing to create this good news, news that didn't require money and policing before the age of "reliable record keeping", and given guvment's sloth there's no reason the murder rates can't go back up -- as other cities prove again and again. We just hope this vigilance isn't a sometime thing.
The TWXSTERS are abandoning the Netscape browser -- about five years after they should have.
Anyone here remember when Netscape Communications went for $4,000 a share or something?
Anyone here remember when Netscape Communications went for $4,000 a share or something?
Shucks, Mr. Top-10-List signed an agreement with the Fantasy and Profanity League.
Numerous big-budget movies have opened during the holiday season without having opportunities for their stars to promote them on the late-night shows as they normally would. The World Wide Pants shows may now be able to book many of those stars, some of whom may still resist appearing on the other shows, like NBC’s “Tonight” with Jay Leno and “Late Night” with Conan O’Brien, and ABC’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”
You can tell this has bothered Mr. TV Wonk for days -- weeks! It doesn't seem to have bothered THE CONSPIRACY -- nor anyone else.
Numerous big-budget movies have opened during the holiday season without having opportunities for their stars to promote them on the late-night shows as they normally would. The World Wide Pants shows may now be able to book many of those stars, some of whom may still resist appearing on the other shows, like NBC’s “Tonight” with Jay Leno and “Late Night” with Conan O’Brien, and ABC’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”
You can tell this has bothered Mr. TV Wonk for days -- weeks! It doesn't seem to have bothered THE CONSPIRACY -- nor anyone else.
BEHIND EVERY PUBLICITY STUNT: Some oaf who pledged to sit on the roof of a bar until his beloved billionaire's tax break won a game came down, his quest unrequited, only to be arrested for welching on his child support.
No pun intended, but how RICH.
[W]hen she saw her former husband talking about how he had spent $500 on Ravens memorabilia and clothing, she said to herself in frustration: "He can pay all that money for Ravens stuff, but he can't pay $50 a week for child support?"
The "team", madam, the "TEAM."
No pun intended, but how RICH.
[W]hen she saw her former husband talking about how he had spent $500 on Ravens memorabilia and clothing, she said to herself in frustration: "He can pay all that money for Ravens stuff, but he can't pay $50 a week for child support?"
The "team", madam, the "TEAM."
ONLY on ArtsJournal:
Why Johnny Can't Write It's taken as fact at colleges and universities across America: students just can't write as well as they used to, and the problem has become so widespread that some schools are requiring students to take courses in proper writing.
And a few links down:
Great Film Crop Shows The Value Of Great Scripts "In a sense, the writers strike couldn't have come at a more opportune time, because it is a painful reminder of what we lose when there are no writers... [This] fall saw what is arguably the best year in American film since the late '70s."
Absolutely NO connection.
Why Johnny Can't Write It's taken as fact at colleges and universities across America: students just can't write as well as they used to, and the problem has become so widespread that some schools are requiring students to take courses in proper writing.
And a few links down:
Great Film Crop Shows The Value Of Great Scripts "In a sense, the writers strike couldn't have come at a more opportune time, because it is a painful reminder of what we lose when there are no writers... [This] fall saw what is arguably the best year in American film since the late '70s."
Absolutely NO connection.
Again, I'm not saying the credit crunch isn't a problem. I'm not saying that a lot of middle class Americans haven't bet a lot on the continued rise in their homes' value, or that if they take a big hit the resulting slowdown in their spending might not tip the whole economy into a recession. (But it might not not!) I'm saying that DURING THE RUNUP IN HOUSING PRICES THE AIR WAS FILLED WITH COMPLAINTS FROM THE LEFT THAT THE RICH WERE BIDDING UP THE VALUE OF HOUSING, WHICH WAS BECOMING UNAFFORDABLE FOR ORDINARY AMERICANS WHOSE WAGES WERE RISING ONLY SLOWLY, ETC..!!!!!!!!!! [SIC] [I'm-never-wrong overemphasis added]
And further, if The Professor says THE MEDIA created all those condo towers in Miami and all those sprawling developments in the middle of nowhere, not to mention the subprimes and the flippers and the "liar loans" and the SIVs and the CDOs and the extremely accurate bond ratings and the Chuck Princes and the Jimmy Caynes and the Stan O'Neals and the Angelo Mozilos, all so they could "scupper the Republicans", WELL, he MUST be right, for he has descended from the heavens to tell the GOSPEL TRUTH -- just like YOU, MICK!
How did this insufferable blowhard get to be so prominent?
(Via Jo-NAH, who's having ANOTHER STAR TREK MOMENT)
And further, if The Professor says THE MEDIA created all those condo towers in Miami and all those sprawling developments in the middle of nowhere, not to mention the subprimes and the flippers and the "liar loans" and the SIVs and the CDOs and the extremely accurate bond ratings and the Chuck Princes and the Jimmy Caynes and the Stan O'Neals and the Angelo Mozilos, all so they could "scupper the Republicans", WELL, he MUST be right, for he has descended from the heavens to tell the GOSPEL TRUTH -- just like YOU, MICK!
How did this insufferable blowhard get to be so prominent?
(Via Jo-NAH, who's having ANOTHER STAR TREK MOMENT)
Comedy Tomorrow, WFB Tonight [Jack Fowler]
Bill Buckley is interviewed tonight on Charlie Rose (check your local listings). Surely they’ll be discussing Bill’s acclaimed new collection, Cancel Your Own G***** Subscription, which can be ordered at the NRO Bookstore.
12/28 09:33 AM
Uh, I think something slipped by your asterisks there, Jack.
Bill Buckley is interviewed tonight on Charlie Rose (check your local listings). Surely they’ll be discussing Bill’s acclaimed new collection, Cancel Your Own G***** Subscription, which can be ordered at the NRO Bookstore.
12/28 09:33 AM
Uh, I think something slipped by your asterisks there, Jack.
Well, it is expensive to run a museum. We may wonder, though, if it's expensive enough for the Smithsonian to pay over $30,000 to give a departing museum director a HI-MOM! moment on DVD.
We hope all this busy-busy rule writing works, but high-mucky-muck type-A CEO wannabes may now have another incentive not to work for GUVMENT.
We hope all this busy-busy rule writing works, but high-mucky-muck type-A CEO wannabes may now have another incentive not to work for GUVMENT.
WOW! SLIME's publishing a new book by Benazir Bhutto -- for $75,000!
We think of the tragic tale of JACK's memoir, which even the overbearingly loud worship of His name by Beltway frauds could not prevent from taking a slow trip into the remainder bins; and certainly there might be more interest here. Then again it is another two months. SLIME, better try to monetize MySpace.
We think of the tragic tale of JACK's memoir, which even the overbearingly loud worship of His name by Beltway frauds could not prevent from taking a slow trip into the remainder bins; and certainly there might be more interest here. Then again it is another two months. SLIME, better try to monetize MySpace.
The Web site of the newsrag whose owners may have been trying to get a heavily flattering in to Russia now says:
Viewpoint: Enough with Democracy!
Okay, it's a "contributor", and he's talking about the Middle East. But couldn't he be talking about BellyKisserLand too? And why shouldn't we suspect the TWXSTERS of wanting an in? Henry Luce temporarily turned His newsrag into IKE FOR PRESIDENT -- and it certainly wasn't because He wanted Ike's old uniform from his closet to play war in.
Then again this guy praises THE FIXER. Nuf said.
Viewpoint: Enough with Democracy!
Okay, it's a "contributor", and he's talking about the Middle East. But couldn't he be talking about BellyKisserLand too? And why shouldn't we suspect the TWXSTERS of wanting an in? Henry Luce temporarily turned His newsrag into IKE FOR PRESIDENT -- and it certainly wasn't because He wanted Ike's old uniform from his closet to play war in.
Then again this guy praises THE FIXER. Nuf said.
Thursday, December 27, 2007
In its short history as an independent state, Pakistan has seen a series of military coups and returns to civilian rule, political murders and times of reconciliation. When East Pakistan seceded from the country to become Bangladesh in 1971, there was also talk of the nation coming undone, but it survived that and will likely survive this.
Let us keep our fingers crossed. Today is hardly a day for sanguinity.
Let us keep our fingers crossed. Today is hardly a day for sanguinity.
It is a cretinous question to have to ask, but could her looks have killed her? After all, if there's one thing the holy cockroaches can't stand, it's women.
Here we thought PEOPLE WARNER ran that Poop-of-the-Year stunt so its new King could do more biz in Russia -- and now He's rushin' to break up the company?!?!?
Bewkes may spin off the cable-television division and sell the AOL Web and Time Inc. magazine units, said Gamco Investors Inc. fund manager Chris Marangi and National City Bank analyst Daniel Poole. The remaining company, anchored by the film studio and cable-TV networks, would resemble Viacom Inc. -- and accordingly command higher multiples, Marangi said.
Sumner Redstone's Viacom, owner of Paramount Pictures and MTV Networks, trades for nine times projected 2008 earnings before interest, taxes and non-cash expenses, Marangi said in an interview. New York-based Time Warner, whose assets include Warner Bros., CNN and HBO, trades at seven.
Like, WOW! That's a real run-up!
Bewkes may spin off the cable-television division and sell the AOL Web and Time Inc. magazine units, said Gamco Investors Inc. fund manager Chris Marangi and National City Bank analyst Daniel Poole. The remaining company, anchored by the film studio and cable-TV networks, would resemble Viacom Inc. -- and accordingly command higher multiples, Marangi said.
Sumner Redstone's Viacom, owner of Paramount Pictures and MTV Networks, trades for nine times projected 2008 earnings before interest, taxes and non-cash expenses, Marangi said in an interview. New York-based Time Warner, whose assets include Warner Bros., CNN and HBO, trades at seven.
Like, WOW! That's a real run-up!
Now the question is, how much of an investigation will Best-Seller Pervez launch -- and how far will it go before it reveals some culpability on his associates' part?
Speaking of Joey, he's about to hold a press conference!
Today, December 27, 2007, a date which will live in infamy....
Today, December 27, 2007, a date which will live in infamy....
Of course we can hope against hope that Pakistan is "rioted out", as the populace realizes more screaming and shooting won't help a nation mightily plagued with the twin scourges of history and Islamism.
We may have this to go by, too:
In Pakistan she was often far less popular than her foreign press made out. (Via NRO)
We may have this to go by, too:
In Pakistan she was often far less popular than her foreign press made out. (Via NRO)
"(Bhutto) is just a concern. The move to gold is the flight to safety and quality on the headlines on a quiet illiquid day," Camilla Sutton, currency strategist at Scotia Capital in Toronto, told Reuters.
Oh.
Oh.
TRANSLATION: There are only so many S&M movie phreaks.
And Johnny, tell us this -- if it's such an awful thing the movie sked is so crowded how did people make time for them when there were lots more good movies?
Oops, mustn't say that. MR. WIDE-EYED ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIAST says MOVIES ARE!!!!! BETTER THAN EVER!!!!!
And Johnny, tell us this -- if it's such an awful thing the movie sked is so crowded how did people make time for them when there were lots more good movies?
Oops, mustn't say that. MR. WIDE-EYED ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIAST says MOVIES ARE!!!!! BETTER THAN EVER!!!!!
Not bad -- and then some ASSPRESS HACK has to spoil it:
A face that will tease you, and please you and perhaps unease you....
These scribblers must be kept on a short leash -- about TWO INCHES short.
P. S. Now it strikes us: did the POSTAL DISSERVICE airbrush out a CIGARETTE?
Still not bad, though.
(Links updated 7/4/2008)
Then again, we suspect most of Pakistan's political bigwigs are hiding under their desks.
Tally-HO!!!!!
Why are we thinking this guy is the most multifaceted fake since Nixon?
We're guessing best-seller Pervez stays under his desk for a while -- the moment he comes out there are mass riots.
Mr. My Business is My Business prostrates himself before Mickey D, meaning he was probably in Oak Brook to make a $100,000 speech, and no doubt he hasn't eaten in a Mick in years, except possibly on the campaign trail, and then he probably pulled a KERRY.
A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD TO BIZ, WHO ALWAYS HAS IT HIS WAY! (Nope, that was B----r K--g.)
A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD TO BIZ, WHO ALWAYS HAS IT HIS WAY! (Nope, that was B----r K--g.)
Where's our favorite star of the late-night fake news shows, Best-Seller Pervez? Hiding under his desk?
The TWXSTERS come up with a new gag to fatten their onion-skin-skinny rag: "People Who Mattered." That this is not about people who mattered (whatever that means) but is just another way to schmooze is clear from the top of the list:
Judd Apatow
Now's the time for us to show who matters -- to stop buying the TWXSTERS' Godforsaken rag and put it and its toadying mendacity out of business.
Judd Apatow
Now's the time for us to show who matters -- to stop buying the TWXSTERS' Godforsaken rag and put it and its toadying mendacity out of business.
The holy cockroaches claim their most famous victim.
Now will the lunkheads who say they're harmless get it into their heads?
(Link updated 8:46 a.m.)
Now will the lunkheads who say they're harmless get it into their heads?
(Link updated 8:46 a.m.)
Meantime, in Boston, more important matters: a once-proud school crumbles to dust under the weight of dummies and delinquents. The cliché here is to say if only we had, say, the wealth of the New England Patriots to spend on such schools, but unfortunately we've long spent such wealth, and it seems to go in the students' ears and out the others.
The Sports-Typist Cliché of the Month is that the New England Patriots are "hated." They're "hated", we'd guess, because they win a lot. Think of the Chicago Cubs. They're "beloved" because they lose a lot. If the Chicago Cubs won five straight World Series the sports typists would tell us they're a "hated" team too. No, such typing merely only further goes to show the sole purpose of professional sports franchises is to make billionaires richer and millionaire typists richer and to act as a "a gigantic beer-delivery mechanism."
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Thanks to this dispatch from THE AMERICAN CONFEDERATION OF SUPERDUPERMEGAGIGABLOGGERS AND TRADEMARK INFRINGERS we found a link to a story which told us this need-to-know news:
LUDWIGSHAFEN, Germany, December 26 /PRNewswire/ -- In some countries the new year will be welcomed with nice festive fireworks. But without chemistry, there would be no colourful stars shining in the night sky, no sparkling rain, no silver trails in the darkness. In entertaining weekly episodes our Chemical Reporter answers questions on Chemistry in our everyday life.
Direct subscription via RSS-Feed or iTunes (search for "basf"):
http://corporate.basf.com/en/podcast/reporter.xml
Podcast The Chemical Reporter, English edition:
http://www.basf.com/podcast
More podcasts:
Podcast Chemistry of Innovations: http://www.basf.com/podcast
This podcast is the audible innovation magazine of BASF. Experience monthly an actual topic on how Chemistry will design our future. The actual episode is on "Printed Electronics".
Well! You learn something new every day -- especially from THE AMERICAN CONFEDERATION OF SUPERDUPERMEGAGIGABLOGGERS AND TRADEMARK INFRINGERS!
News to warm the cockles of GEKKO KUDLOW's...GREED: The CEO of Tyson Foods gets his stock to where it was in '91 -- and gets paid almost $25 MILLION for it!
Options, shmoptions, he's obviously risen to the level of his...salary.
Options, shmoptions, he's obviously risen to the level of his...salary.
The Nintendo Wii and Garmin GPS systems were among the company's "Hot Holiday Best Sellers" from November through Dec. 19. In the personal computer category, Amazon said the Apple MacBook, Nokia Internet Tablet PC and HP Pavilion Entertainment Notebook PC were strong sellers. DVDs top sellers included Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Planet Earth: The Complete BBC Series and Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End.
Among Amazon's selection of books Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, The Dangerous Book for Boys by Conn Iggulden and Hal Iggulden and I Am America (And So Can You) by Stephen Colbert were all cited.
While long on trivia, Amazon's statement was short on specifics....
When can we start wishing for bad things for THIS Avatar of Permanent Prosperity? (Current P/E only 108)
Among Amazon's selection of books Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, The Dangerous Book for Boys by Conn Iggulden and Hal Iggulden and I Am America (And So Can You) by Stephen Colbert were all cited.
While long on trivia, Amazon's statement was short on specifics....
When can we start wishing for bad things for THIS Avatar of Permanent Prosperity? (Current P/E only 108)
No, I haven't lost my mind. [Opening sentence of SECOND GRAF]
We should ignore some megapundits because they make it TOO EASY.
We should ignore some megapundits because they make it TOO EASY.
We remember fretting how The New Republic cut its number of issues in half. But if David Browne (should that be pronounced Brownee?) is typical of what's in store for TNR's readers it might want to cut its schedule in half again. I never heard this song; but the ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIASTS are so self-centered by following them you become as precious and ignorant as they.
THE best movie performance so far this century? No contest. There's Daniel Day-Lewis' awe-inspiring turn as a greedy oilman in "There Will Be Blood," and there is everyone else.
ANOTHER ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIA...er, movie reviewer at work.
Well, he DID say "century." He COULD have said "ever." We think he meant to.
ANOTHER ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIA...er, movie reviewer at work.
Well, he DID say "century." He COULD have said "ever." We think he meant to.
And speaking of con-SER-va-tives and the housing DEPRESSION, how many must feel this article is heresy because it doesn't blame NEWSMEN, nor the government first?
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
What Granma correspondent strings for the ASSPress? These idiots always try to make it look as though Cuba is a democracy. So when CURLEY (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) belches about His POLITICAL PRISONER (pray tell Curl, what happened to him?) we must NOT give Him the benefit of the doubt.
A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD AND AN ADDED BAH HUMBUG TO THE ASSPRESS!
A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD AND AN ADDED BAH HUMBUG TO THE ASSPRESS!
Which movie to see
How about which movie not to see? That should be easier -- unless of course you're an ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIAST.
How about which movie not to see? That should be easier -- unless of course you're an ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIAST.
And now for our annual tradition of Christmas-tree photos and Yahoo! links that expire in thirty days:
A Christmas tree in Kabul;
A Christmas tree (?) in Hong Kong;
A Christmas tree in Bucharest;
Christmas trees (artificial) in Moscow (Russia being "a strangely difficult place to get a decent Christmas tree", so the caption says);
A Christmas tree at our naval base in Manama, Bahrain;
A Christmas tree in Berlin;
A Christmas tree (?) in Tokyo;
A Christmas tree in Jerusalem's Old City;
A Christmas tree in Madrid (where do they get these ideas?);
A Christmas tree "in the courtyard of the Elysee Palace in Paris";
And if we can find any more today we'll post them. Next year we must do this up brown -- I should say, green. But it would help to have a few more visitors. Anyway,
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
A Christmas tree in Kabul;
A Christmas tree (?) in Hong Kong;
A Christmas tree in Bucharest;
Christmas trees (artificial) in Moscow (Russia being "a strangely difficult place to get a decent Christmas tree", so the caption says);
A Christmas tree at our naval base in Manama, Bahrain;
A Christmas tree in Berlin;
A Christmas tree (?) in Tokyo;
A Christmas tree in Jerusalem's Old City;
A Christmas tree in Madrid (where do they get these ideas?);
A Christmas tree "in the courtyard of the Elysee Palace in Paris";
And if we can find any more today we'll post them. Next year we must do this up brown -- I should say, green. But it would help to have a few more visitors. Anyway,
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Monday, December 24, 2007
The major television networks could lose 20 percent of their total audience as the result of a prolonged writers' strike, according to a to advertising executive.
It's a conundrum for advertisers: even as ratings fall, ad prices on network TV are soaring.
SIGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....
It's a conundrum for advertisers: even as ratings fall, ad prices on network TV are soaring.
SIGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....
CHATTERBOX
Holiday-Week Journalism
All the news that's fit to pad.
Timothy Noah
I don't know, St. Warrenites: You're pretty good at stuffing your site full of lumps of coal too.
Holiday-Week Journalism
All the news that's fit to pad.
Timothy Noah
I don't know, St. Warrenites: You're pretty good at stuffing your site full of lumps of coal too.
With all these superrich sports typists crowding into the Big E, there's just one question: how do we know who they are? Since they're all under one roof it might be hard to differentiate them -- especially as despite their salaries their wuhk might be less distinctive than they or ESPNCorp think. These clowns might overestimate their salaries and underestimate having regular exposure in a regional outlet -- with a dedicated Web site, and a dedicated space where the typist may be seen. And if the idea is to do sports news -- how much sports news happens in a day?
This is just a tiny variation of the dotcom bust, where people paid big bucks for theories that didn't work.
This is just a tiny variation of the dotcom bust, where people paid big bucks for theories that didn't work.
G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE LOST MONEY IN AOL?!?!?
G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE at $6,000 A SHARE!
G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE at $6,000 A SHARE!
Sunday, December 23, 2007
In a post in Aramvirumque Stefan Beck writes of Harry "Synergy" Potter:
I think it’s reasonable to suggest that adults spend their reading time, a limited and thus very precious resource, on better books. If that’s wishful thinking, can’t they at least pick better books to obsess about?
And he links to an article from 2000 by Harold Bloom, who writes:
A vast concourse of inadequate works, for adults and for children, crams the dustbins of the ages.
This is one of the many reasons I get excited over ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIASTS.
I think it’s reasonable to suggest that adults spend their reading time, a limited and thus very precious resource, on better books. If that’s wishful thinking, can’t they at least pick better books to obsess about?
And he links to an article from 2000 by Harold Bloom, who writes:
A vast concourse of inadequate works, for adults and for children, crams the dustbins of the ages.
This is one of the many reasons I get excited over ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIASTS.
IMPRESSIVE:
Roman Catholics have overtaken Anglicans as the country's dominant religious group....
[T]he number of people going to Sunday Mass in England last year averaged 861,000, compared with 852,000 Anglicans worshipping.
Smashing. And how many Brits think the telly is God?
As for Britain's most prominent Catholic, if in doubt he can always switch to the Church of Kerry and Kennedy. Of course they're of Irish descent but....
(Via al Reut)
Roman Catholics have overtaken Anglicans as the country's dominant religious group....
[T]he number of people going to Sunday Mass in England last year averaged 861,000, compared with 852,000 Anglicans worshipping.
Smashing. And how many Brits think the telly is God?
As for Britain's most prominent Catholic, if in doubt he can always switch to the Church of Kerry and Kennedy. Of course they're of Irish descent but....
(Via al Reut)
I'm hard pressed to find a difference between the ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIASTS' notion that MOVIES ARE!!!!! BETTER THAN EVER!!!!! and the arm-waving notion that led so many to believe in permanent real-estate prosperity. What explains such collective suspensions of disbelief? When you're throwing money into houses there must come a time when you say, "What if things go bad? Better ease up." And yet so many folks abandoned themselves to permanent prosperity, as they're now abandoning themselves to scrimping just to live.
That reminds us of the 100-year-old man who didn't have heat in his government-supplied bedroom until DA NOOZ complained. And he lives alone. How many people can't even claim a guardian angel for a friend?
We feel sad about the woman who received a fake winning lottery ticket, but at least some people came along to give the woman a well-needed hug.
We wonder too if the word humor was spelled with two U's.
We wonder too if the word humor was spelled with two U's.
OH oh, guess which immortal masterwork went kerflooey in the marketplace this weekend -- the one with the SINGING BARBER!
This could make A Little Night Music look good.
It also appears many of the WIDE-EYEDLY ACCLAIMED IMMORTALITIES didn't do so hot either -- like the one about JOE WILSON'S...never mind.
This is a catastrophe in PINCHDOM and its overlapping kingdom of SONDHEIMANIA. Though we're not that familiar with THE GREATEST MUSICAL -- pardon, OPERA EVER we suspect it might have worked as a Charles Addams kind of film -- nothing offensive, just good ghoulish laughs. Instead DER KULT got worked up over its self-importance, and with the help of ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIASTS it's deposited an egg almost as big as KERNGERSHWIN HAMMERSTEIN laid two years ago.
And did the world NEED a parody of WALK THE LINE?
And now come the RECRIMINATIONS -- SUMNER SOLD IT THE WRONG WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nothing wrong with the movie, to be sure -- THERE NEVER IS.
Hmmm: Could HERR DOKTOR sue SUMNER for MARKETING MALPRACTICE?
I'm not sure he should -- SUMNER may have paid for BLOG MENTIONS.
By the way...what IS a "Brian Lowry"?
This could make A Little Night Music look good.
It also appears many of the WIDE-EYEDLY ACCLAIMED IMMORTALITIES didn't do so hot either -- like the one about JOE WILSON'S...never mind.
This is a catastrophe in PINCHDOM and its overlapping kingdom of SONDHEIMANIA. Though we're not that familiar with THE GREATEST MUSICAL -- pardon, OPERA EVER we suspect it might have worked as a Charles Addams kind of film -- nothing offensive, just good ghoulish laughs. Instead DER KULT got worked up over its self-importance, and with the help of ARM-WAVING ENTHUSIASTS it's deposited an egg almost as big as KERNGERSHWIN HAMMERSTEIN laid two years ago.
And did the world NEED a parody of WALK THE LINE?
And now come the RECRIMINATIONS -- SUMNER SOLD IT THE WRONG WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nothing wrong with the movie, to be sure -- THERE NEVER IS.
Hmmm: Could HERR DOKTOR sue SUMNER for MARKETING MALPRACTICE?
I'm not sure he should -- SUMNER may have paid for BLOG MENTIONS.
By the way...what IS a "Brian Lowry"?
The lobbying outfit that protested in the dreadful case of the teenager who needed a liver transplant wants government-run healthcare.
This bill would establish the California Universal Healthcare System to be administered by the newly created California Universal Healthcare Agency under the control of a Universal Healthcare Commissioner appointed by the Governor and subject to confirmation by the Senate.
TRANSLATION: Instead of some hounded bureaucrat in a greedy insurance company denying a transplant, some hounded bureaucrat in an incompetent government bureaucracy would deny it.
SIX OF ONE....
This bill would establish the California Universal Healthcare System to be administered by the newly created California Universal Healthcare Agency under the control of a Universal Healthcare Commissioner appointed by the Governor and subject to confirmation by the Senate.
TRANSLATION: Instead of some hounded bureaucrat in a greedy insurance company denying a transplant, some hounded bureaucrat in an incompetent government bureaucracy would deny it.
SIX OF ONE....
I know it’s hard to believe, but during the past 12 months I sometimes went two or three weeks in a row without finding anything to mock, deflate or be disappointed by, and my inner curmudgeon was frequently elbowed aside by a wide-eyed, arm-waving enthusiast.
If we want wide-eyed, arm-waving enthusiasts, A. O., we'll let you know; meantime you've provided the definitive reason why AMERICA DOES NOT NEED MOVIE AD-BLURBISTS.
By the way, Mr. Wide-Eyed, Arm-Waving Enthusiast -- what's the difference between you and HARRY KNOWLES except YOU'RE BETTER?
OLD WIDE EYES, YOU'VE JUST WON THE NEUHARTHISM OF THE YEAR AWARD!!!!!
If we want wide-eyed, arm-waving enthusiasts, A. O., we'll let you know; meantime you've provided the definitive reason why AMERICA DOES NOT NEED MOVIE AD-BLURBISTS.
By the way, Mr. Wide-Eyed, Arm-Waving Enthusiast -- what's the difference between you and HARRY KNOWLES except YOU'RE BETTER?
OLD WIDE EYES, YOU'VE JUST WON THE NEUHARTHISM OF THE YEAR AWARD!!!!!