THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
Blogroll Me!
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Saturday, April 22, 2006
Surprise: the P-Ulitzer co-winner contributed $7,000 to Democrats in 2004.
Maybe that's why Sandy Burglar hired her, n'est-ce pas?
Meantime the P-Ulitzer co-winner's candidate of 2004, Mis-tah HEIN-TZZZ, begins his next campaign with a Cooper Union speech in which he says abandoning Iraq in the name of a noble cause is right and just. I think it's time Mary gave him some more money!
P. S. The PAPER OF RE-CORD says the P-Ulitzer co-winner has an "independent" streak. (Judging from those campaign contributions we'd say it's more of a Democratic streak.) It further says her P-Ulitzer co-winning work may have come thanks to "low morale" at the Langley Acrostics Palace. It still further says her career "stalled" when YOU-KNOW-WHO took over.
"It looks to me like Mary is being used as a sacrificial lamb," said Larry Johnson, a former C.I.A. officer who worked for Ms. McCarthy in the agency's Latin America section.
I don't know -- her bleating was loud enough to win an award.
I think we'll hear far more about (and presumably from) the P-Ulitzer co-winner these next few weeks than we'll want to.
Maybe that's why Sandy Burglar hired her, n'est-ce pas?
Meantime the P-Ulitzer co-winner's candidate of 2004, Mis-tah HEIN-TZZZ, begins his next campaign with a Cooper Union speech in which he says abandoning Iraq in the name of a noble cause is right and just. I think it's time Mary gave him some more money!
P. S. The PAPER OF RE-CORD says the P-Ulitzer co-winner has an "independent" streak. (Judging from those campaign contributions we'd say it's more of a Democratic streak.) It further says her P-Ulitzer co-winning work may have come thanks to "low morale" at the Langley Acrostics Palace. It still further says her career "stalled" when YOU-KNOW-WHO took over.
"It looks to me like Mary is being used as a sacrificial lamb," said Larry Johnson, a former C.I.A. officer who worked for Ms. McCarthy in the agency's Latin America section.
I don't know -- her bleating was loud enough to win an award.
I think we'll hear far more about (and presumably from) the P-Ulitzer co-winner these next few weeks than we'll want to.
Surprise: Sandy Burglar appointed the co-winner of the P-Ulitzer Prize.
(Shucks, our friend Super-Hero seems to have disappeared, or he might say, "Sorry for the NewsMAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
(Shucks, our friend Super-Hero seems to have disappeared, or he might say, "Sorry for the NewsMAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Ha ha ha! The Flying Saucer on the Football Field has lost its historic landmark status!
And of course one of the "architects" blames "the media", which is just a way of saying he has no talent.
And of course one of the "architects" blames "the media", which is just a way of saying he has no talent.
Friday, April 21, 2006
NBC: CIA officer fired after admitting leak
The LEAST Dana can do is share her P-Ulitzer with HIM.
Meantime the WaPosties flatter themselves:
The story on the prisons drew criticism from both ends of the political spectrum, with some critics denouncing the Post for revealing the network and others complaining that the paper withheld the names of the Eastern European countries.
TRANSLATION: If we made both sides mad it MUST be good!
The LEAST Dana can do is share her P-Ulitzer with HIM.
Meantime the WaPosties flatter themselves:
The story on the prisons drew criticism from both ends of the political spectrum, with some critics denouncing the Post for revealing the network and others complaining that the paper withheld the names of the Eastern European countries.
TRANSLATION: If we made both sides mad it MUST be good!
Another masterwork withheld from the ad-blurbists!
Twelve thus far this year! How many more, SAMMY GLICKMAN?
Twelve thus far this year! How many more, SAMMY GLICKMAN?
The Month of Short Spoons will not save George Bush's reputation
Meantime, what's THE WEEKLY STANDARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! up to?
Meantime, what's THE WEEKLY STANDARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! up to?
Hey DICK "GUNS CAUSED COLUMBINE" CORLISS!! Somebody discovered another high-school shooting plot just in the nick of time! Aren't you glad? (Maybe not; it would have helped CNN and your bosses could have made a movie.) Now we don't have to test your rickety hypothesis -- for a while.
Chinese President in Connecticut Friday
Let's see, who's in Connecticut? GE BANCORP AND REALTY, UNITED TECHNOLOGIES -- yep, I think we're going to have a field day CLONING COMPANIES!
Let's see, who's in Connecticut? GE BANCORP AND REALTY, UNITED TECHNOLOGIES -- yep, I think we're going to have a field day CLONING COMPANIES!
U.S. national security adviser Stephen Hadley told CNN they had asked the Chinese to do six things related to human rights, and "they have indicated that there are three of them they are prepared to do after this visit."
He would not specify what those initiatives were.
Are we up to silent -- er, quiet diplomacy again?
He would not specify what those initiatives were.
Are we up to silent -- er, quiet diplomacy again?
Thursday, April 20, 2006
Bush Urges Hu to Let Yuan Rise in `Candid' Talks
TRANSLATION: We're one step shy of yelling -- and in our case yelling at a mirror would be just as productive.
TRANSLATION: We're one step shy of yelling -- and in our case yelling at a mirror would be just as productive.
The loonies are buying GOOG again; our only solace is what can happen to a once-high-flying stock.
9/11 is about to become a partisan football. Already we have a con-SER-va-tive movie. The ad-blurbists will no doubt try to act respectful -- it was, after all, a TRAGEDY -- but the damage is done. The right is prepared to claim the date as its own, while the left still whines over Iraq, and treats Muslims with excessive and politically correct deference. One fears if we ever endure another national dark night of the soul we won't wave flags but fingers. Don't conservatives and liberals share ANYTHING save for a willingness to screech at each other while denying their own culpability?
The first generation HD-DVD player is like -- a computer! It takes forever to boot up!
(Via ShowBizData.com and (oh well) the TWXSTERS)
(Via ShowBizData.com and (oh well) the TWXSTERS)
The thea-TAH proceeds backwards apace. Looking at this picture of Barbie Live! I cannot help thinking of my favorite musical, The Black Crook. The Black Crook had women in tights dancing before an elaborately painted flat; so does Barbie Live! The Black Crook had non-music; so does Barbie Live! One other similarity: the theater of the nineteenth century had no real musicals.
Then again, the theater of the nineteenth century didn't have MARKETING.
And speaking of B. S., he's still making an ass of himself as usual:
I still say that if I ran a news organization — not likely — I would not submit entries to the Pulitzers and similar prize juries. The award that matters is the return visit of a reader well-served.
To which we say, after a palace revolt of your high-paid-snob underlings you'd change your tune. As for that second sentence, you can utter platitudes just as well as any P-Ulitzer board member.
I still say that if I ran a news organization — not likely — I would not submit entries to the Pulitzers and similar prize juries. The award that matters is the return visit of a reader well-served.
To which we say, after a palace revolt of your high-paid-snob underlings you'd change your tune. As for that second sentence, you can utter platitudes just as well as any P-Ulitzer board member.
So -- if SUMNER's going to simulcast two shock jocks from XM, what's to prevent somebody from simulcasting whatever that fellow was who bolted for whatever that other satellite radio provider is?
Huh, ZONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN?????
Who's going to man the BLEEP button, MOONER?
B. S. Defender is in a hyena mood.
(Via Yahoo! News and Forbes.com)
Correction: it will be tape-delayed, meaning SUMNER and MOONER might be better off sticking with that old rocker.
Huh, ZONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN?????
Who's going to man the BLEEP button, MOONER?
B. S. Defender is in a hyena mood.
(Via Yahoo! News and Forbes.com)
Correction: it will be tape-delayed, meaning SUMNER and MOONER might be better off sticking with that old rocker.
Oh NO, Little Malcolm spewed MORE gas into the atmosphere:
My prediction is that we will see ourselves more and more connected to the quantum field, not physically but through the mind. This “mind field” is invisible and universal; it encompasses all living things; it weaves the fabric of nature. As our prejudice in favor of solid, concrete things fades away, certain fringe phenomena will become everyday. Healing without touch will be legitimized, since the human body can be altered by altering the field. Telepathy and clairvoyance will seem ordinary, since time and distance are compressed to a single point in the field; Intuition and epiphanies will be explained as subtle field interactions. The best outcome would be that wisdom will reemerge as a vital human capacity, for there is no doubt that our spiritual forebears were deeply in touch with the same invisible reality that still surrounds us. We have shut out that reality in our stubborn, rigid insistence on believing our senses, but seeing with the eyes of the soul is possible. In the end, a new humanity is also possible once we escape the prison we have sentenced ourselves to for far too long. The so-called sixth sense isn’t a separate sense at all, but a new opening for human evolution with unlimited possibilities.
In the word of Charlie Brown, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
My prediction is that we will see ourselves more and more connected to the quantum field, not physically but through the mind. This “mind field” is invisible and universal; it encompasses all living things; it weaves the fabric of nature. As our prejudice in favor of solid, concrete things fades away, certain fringe phenomena will become everyday. Healing without touch will be legitimized, since the human body can be altered by altering the field. Telepathy and clairvoyance will seem ordinary, since time and distance are compressed to a single point in the field; Intuition and epiphanies will be explained as subtle field interactions. The best outcome would be that wisdom will reemerge as a vital human capacity, for there is no doubt that our spiritual forebears were deeply in touch with the same invisible reality that still surrounds us. We have shut out that reality in our stubborn, rigid insistence on believing our senses, but seeing with the eyes of the soul is possible. In the end, a new humanity is also possible once we escape the prison we have sentenced ourselves to for far too long. The so-called sixth sense isn’t a separate sense at all, but a new opening for human evolution with unlimited possibilities.
In the word of Charlie Brown, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Bush, Hu Make Little Progress on Trade
This should make the Sinophile-industrial complex a little happier.
This should make the Sinophile-industrial complex a little happier.
'We're killing each other'
Hey isn't that the whole point of [C]RAP, and the GANGSTA culture? He with the most notches wins? He who's shot down the most innocents wins? He who dispatches the most babies to Heaven wins?
And these hypocritical bastards have the guts to celebrate violent crime, and to scream NO SNITCHIN.
Hey isn't that the whole point of [C]RAP, and the GANGSTA culture? He with the most notches wins? He who's shot down the most innocents wins? He who dispatches the most babies to Heaven wins?
And these hypocritical bastards have the guts to celebrate violent crime, and to scream NO SNITCHIN.
The PAPER OF RE-CORD discovers a STAR!
I guess I shouldn't paint with too broad a brush, but don't we have enough Britneys and Ashlees and Lindsays?
I guess I shouldn't paint with too broad a brush, but don't we have enough Britneys and Ashlees and Lindsays?
We wouldn't pay mind to mindless show-biz types speaking out except so many testify on Capitol Hill as experts.
And if "decrying the Vietnam War" was so courageous why is a certain Vietnam-era fossil keeping her mouth shut about Iraq?
And if "decrying the Vietnam War" was so courageous why is a certain Vietnam-era fossil keeping her mouth shut about Iraq?
Government is cracking down on payola -- and it's proving...costly:
Radio programmers at stations around the country say that fear of regulatory scrutiny has scared them into airing fewer new songs. Instead, many stations are sticking to less diverse playlists.
So -- instead of playing five songs they play three?
Radio programmers at stations around the country say that fear of regulatory scrutiny has scared them into airing fewer new songs. Instead, many stations are sticking to less diverse playlists.
So -- instead of playing five songs they play three?
For the second time in two days PINCH runs a piece in His empire celebrating how show-biz (or some form thereof) is showing up all those moral stuffed shirts, which doubly reminds us to pay no heed when Bill Keller SPEAKS TRUTH TO POWER, or when PINCH's editorial page thunders over an injustice committed by anyone two steps to the right of Fidel Castro.
He's chosen a mighty dull person for a "hero" anyway. But then we doubt PINCH is all that exciting without His empire.
He's chosen a mighty dull person for a "hero" anyway. But then we doubt PINCH is all that exciting without His empire.
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
These guys (writing for a certain second-rate site) may think they've come across a bold nugget of wisdom, but THE CONSPIRACY may be shooting itself in its already toeless foot when it doesn't run press screenings. We forget the AD-BLURBISTS have huzzahed MANY gross-out "comedies"; arguably they affirmed the...genre with their raves. The worst these hacks would say is that a film is not quite as HILARIOUS as the classics of grossout before them. And they have a guaranteed audience of the mentally -- gifted. Why not screen them? It might mean an extra few bucks in the BEEEEEEEEEEEEE-OH. Besides, ad-blurbists know how to clear consciences -- yours and theirs.
P. S.
More On This Topic
Companies: YHOO
You up to something, Little Malcolm?
P. S.
Companies: YHOO
You up to something, Little Malcolm?
WHY? JERNALISM: I have not commented on a certain blessed event because I couldn't care less about super-rich weirdos, and I'm sick of hearing about Scientology, especially through a haze of forced "nonjudgmentalism." Yet the story has all but paralyzed the nation's luxury news suites for days. Then there's this choice hunk of tripe, whose 1,054 EGREGIOUS WORDS prove the obvious when they're not meant to upset a put-upon reader. How much do the suites waste their time on such bilge? On the other hand the P-Ulitzers just made a COURAGEOUS STATEMENT, and if the press stopped running one kind of bilge it would merely run another. (Sorry for the Jonny Hairshirt.)
P. S. PINCH'S NEW ENGLAND EDITION, I don't think I'd have used that title: it only reminds us of THE CARTOON RIOTS, and that there is ONE THING MOST NEWS HACKS WILL NEVER PRINT.
P. P. S. Pinch's pile of unprintable is another of those the-more-I-think-about-it-the-angrier-I-get pieces. We know THE CONSPIRACY's running from the newspapers faster than the Road Runner ever ran from its mentor Wile E. Coyote. Is this a backhanded way of saying we'll loosen up if you promise to stuff our pockets?
P. S. PINCH'S NEW ENGLAND EDITION, I don't think I'd have used that title: it only reminds us of THE CARTOON RIOTS, and that there is ONE THING MOST NEWS HACKS WILL NEVER PRINT.
P. P. S. Pinch's pile of unprintable is another of those the-more-I-think-about-it-the-angrier-I-get pieces. We know THE CONSPIRACY's running from the newspapers faster than the Road Runner ever ran from its mentor Wile E. Coyote. Is this a backhanded way of saying we'll loosen up if you promise to stuff our pockets?
We post this story in full:
SAN FRANCISCO (MarketWatch) -- Critical Mention Inc., a privately held media search and monitoring service, said Wednesday that former CNBC anchor Ron Insana has joined its board of directors.
In a written statement, Critical Mention said Insana will provide "strategic direction and counsel" to the New York-based company, which provides Web-based services that allow businesses to monitor, search and track television coverage. Critical Mention was formed in 2002.
Insana joined CNBC in 1991. He is the host of "Street Signs," an hour-long show that airs daily on the network, and contributes to other programs as an analyst.
Thwo questions: 1. How did Ron Insana get to be so knowledgeable? and 2. Isn't this the sort of thing that bunches Little Howie Hairshirt's shorts into a wad?
SAN FRANCISCO (MarketWatch) -- Critical Mention Inc., a privately held media search and monitoring service, said Wednesday that former CNBC anchor Ron Insana has joined its board of directors.
In a written statement, Critical Mention said Insana will provide "strategic direction and counsel" to the New York-based company, which provides Web-based services that allow businesses to monitor, search and track television coverage. Critical Mention was formed in 2002.
Insana joined CNBC in 1991. He is the host of "Street Signs," an hour-long show that airs daily on the network, and contributes to other programs as an analyst.
Thwo questions: 1. How did Ron Insana get to be so knowledgeable? and 2. Isn't this the sort of thing that bunches Little Howie Hairshirt's shorts into a wad?
Little Howie Hairshirt makes an ASTONISHING DISCOVERY: Brit Hume's MOVED TO THE RIGHT!
Boy we're lucky you work all these jobs and make all those BIG BUCKS ferreting out such TRUTHS! What would we EVER do without you?
(Via MediaBistro.com)
Boy we're lucky you work all these jobs and make all those BIG BUCKS ferreting out such TRUTHS! What would we EVER do without you?
(Via MediaBistro.com)
And speaking of the fount of GLIBERTARIANISM, Mr. Nanotech says we can't make people into androids and automatons fast enough!
Frankensteining, gladiator games -- when does the government start investigating glibertarians?
Frankensteining, gladiator games -- when does the government start investigating glibertarians?
I'd say we just sent a few dozen more people to the hoosegow!
Hu, who dined Tuesday night at the home of Microsoft Corp. Chairman Bill Gates, was invited to tour Boeing Co.'s Everett plant on Wednesday....
With several thousand -- er, DIPLOMATS in tow.
Have you ever seen an aircraft company cloned?
THE IDEOLOGICAL PRETZEL OF CONSERVATISM: Presumably to goose attention to his second-rate site Little Malcolm commissioned some throwaway no-thought think pieces, and one of them has some hack named Ewalt propose bringing back the Roman gladiator games. He says sports is violent, so let's go all the way. Sure. I'd like to see the NFL do that. Why not NASCAR duels to the death? Why not baseball bats as weapons? In hockey they have sticks AND skates! And why limit it to sports? Why not duels between [C]RAPPERS? Or street gangs! He who kills the most toddlers wins! Although to be sure it would perfectly fit the glibertarian nonsense of Little Malcolm as that philosophy is already "pro-choice", and thus pro-death.
No, you don't need to be a blogger to spout garbage.
He also has Larry Summers's temporary successor gas that "What I would wish for is a set of reliable, universally accepted measures for evaluating and comparing student progress toward all the educational goals appropriate to every college and professional school," and somebody named Robert David Steele mewl that the intelligence community needs "a national Open Source Agency. Half of the money earmarked for the agency would go toward traditional intelligence work. The other half would provide for 50 state-wide Citizen Intelligence Networks, including a 24/7 watch center, where citizens can both obtain and input information," proving neither they nor this PR stunt are serious.
P. S. Under the scribbler Ewalt's eructing is this cute little bit of business:
More On This Topic
Companies: GE CBS VIAb NWS DIS
I guess Little Malcolm is serious -- about making money.
No, you don't need to be a blogger to spout garbage.
He also has Larry Summers's temporary successor gas that "What I would wish for is a set of reliable, universally accepted measures for evaluating and comparing student progress toward all the educational goals appropriate to every college and professional school," and somebody named Robert David Steele mewl that the intelligence community needs "a national Open Source Agency. Half of the money earmarked for the agency would go toward traditional intelligence work. The other half would provide for 50 state-wide Citizen Intelligence Networks, including a 24/7 watch center, where citizens can both obtain and input information," proving neither they nor this PR stunt are serious.
P. S. Under the scribbler Ewalt's eructing is this cute little bit of business:
Companies: GE CBS VIAb NWS DIS
I guess Little Malcolm is serious -- about making money.
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Man allegedly shot by rapper dies
Does this mean we get a hundred thousand [C]RAPS proclaiming the guy a SAINT?
Does this mean we get a hundred thousand [C]RAPS proclaiming the guy a SAINT?
[A]s big as it is — and Idol is averaging more than 30 million viewers this season — only one in four potential viewers tune in.
Put another way, "almost three-fourths of viewers watching TV Tuesday at 8 are not watching Idol," says ABC scheduling chief Jeff Bader.
Put another way, nine out of ten AMERICANS aren't watching. In my book that's a good thing.
Put another way, "almost three-fourths of viewers watching TV Tuesday at 8 are not watching Idol," says ABC scheduling chief Jeff Bader.
Put another way, nine out of ten AMERICANS aren't watching. In my book that's a good thing.
Dubya makes another statement for the ages:
"I'm concerned what [the rise in gas prices] means to the working families and small businesses. And I'm also mindful that the government has the responsibility to make sure that we watch very carefully and investigate possible price gouging. And we'll do just that."
GIVE 'EM HECK, DUBYA! (Well, your defenders say you are Harry Truman.)
"I'm concerned what [the rise in gas prices] means to the working families and small businesses. And I'm also mindful that the government has the responsibility to make sure that we watch very carefully and investigate possible price gouging. And we'll do just that."
GIVE 'EM HECK, DUBYA! (Well, your defenders say you are Harry Truman.)
Two posts from AmSpec:
Middle School Specialists? - Tuesday, April 18, 2006 @ 9:49:15 AM
President Bush visits the Parkland Magnet Middle School for Aerospace Technology today to discuss his American Competitiveness Initiative. The absurdity of the federal government promoting "competitiveness" aside, what is this school? As best as I can glean from its website, like all magnet schools it attracts students with particular interests and skills. Such programs seem particularly well suited to high schoolers. The Thomas Jefferson High School for Science and Technology is one well known and excellent magnet school in Northern Virginia. But why on earth would we ask 11-year-olds to specialize in aerospace technology? If college students need a balanced curriculum of the arts and sciences (and they do), then middle schoolers should also be generalists.
Posted By: Dave
Re: Middle School Specialists - Tuesday, April 18, 2006 @ 10:29:39 AM
Dave, this is the picture-perfect portrait of the hopeless and squandering and self-congratulatory official esteem I saw coming in the State of the Union when the New York Times bestowed upon me their Most Unusual Conservative Criticism Award. How many of these kids at our Thomas Jefferson Institutes of Warp Drive Studies can recite any of this redheaded stranger's famous lines, or conduct an educated conversation about what they might mean? For the sake of our culture -- that little thing called Western Civilization, which will unfortunately not be salvaged by adopting Chinese and Indian levels of technocratic proficiency -- the Parkland kids should put their Presidentially-plumped math and science skills to good use -- and build themselves a time machine.
Posted By: James G. Poulos
Dave, James, I have BAD NEWS for you:
SILICON VALLEY is in danger of losing its crown as home of the technology start-up, according to one of the software industry’s leading executives.
Jeff Henley, chairman of Oracle, the world’s second-largest software group, believes that India is on course to become the new hotbed of innovation.
Mr Henley says that America’s strong track record as a developer of software will weaken in the next few years, amid burgeoning activity in Indian cities such as Bombay, Bangalore and Madras.
DUBYA!!!!!!!!!! Time for MORE DILBERTS IN THE CLASSROOMS!!!!!!!!!!
Middle School Specialists? - Tuesday, April 18, 2006 @ 9:49:15 AM
President Bush visits the Parkland Magnet Middle School for Aerospace Technology today to discuss his American Competitiveness Initiative. The absurdity of the federal government promoting "competitiveness" aside, what is this school? As best as I can glean from its website, like all magnet schools it attracts students with particular interests and skills. Such programs seem particularly well suited to high schoolers. The Thomas Jefferson High School for Science and Technology is one well known and excellent magnet school in Northern Virginia. But why on earth would we ask 11-year-olds to specialize in aerospace technology? If college students need a balanced curriculum of the arts and sciences (and they do), then middle schoolers should also be generalists.
Posted By: Dave
Re: Middle School Specialists - Tuesday, April 18, 2006 @ 10:29:39 AM
Dave, this is the picture-perfect portrait of the hopeless and squandering and self-congratulatory official esteem I saw coming in the State of the Union when the New York Times bestowed upon me their Most Unusual Conservative Criticism Award. How many of these kids at our Thomas Jefferson Institutes of Warp Drive Studies can recite any of this redheaded stranger's famous lines, or conduct an educated conversation about what they might mean? For the sake of our culture -- that little thing called Western Civilization, which will unfortunately not be salvaged by adopting Chinese and Indian levels of technocratic proficiency -- the Parkland kids should put their Presidentially-plumped math and science skills to good use -- and build themselves a time machine.
Posted By: James G. Poulos
Dave, James, I have BAD NEWS for you:
SILICON VALLEY is in danger of losing its crown as home of the technology start-up, according to one of the software industry’s leading executives.
Jeff Henley, chairman of Oracle, the world’s second-largest software group, believes that India is on course to become the new hotbed of innovation.
Mr Henley says that America’s strong track record as a developer of software will weaken in the next few years, amid burgeoning activity in Indian cities such as Bombay, Bangalore and Madras.
DUBYA!!!!!!!!!! Time for MORE DILBERTS IN THE CLASSROOMS!!!!!!!!!!
SIX SIGMA AT WORK: GE BANCORP AND REALTY ENTERTAINMENT's putting on its act at GAS PUMPS!
Now if we could put all BIGMEDIA's GAS to work there'd be no energy crisis.
Now if we could put all BIGMEDIA's GAS to work there'd be no energy crisis.
Thad Cochran, recently named by the TWXSTERS as one of the TEN GREATEST SENATORS (and the only one, we may add, who's a REPUBLICAN), has joined with SEN. DISNEY PROTECTION ACT in a $700 MILLION BOONDOGGLE.
How do you like THAT excellence, TWXSTERS?
How do you like THAT excellence, TWXSTERS?
Speaking of the King, I'd look out at my backside -- the talk-show host MICKEYMOUSE NIXON may be wanting to TAKE OVER from you!
Run for mayor, Kingie!
Run for mayor, Kingie!
New 'Online' Factor Played Key Role in Some Pulitzer Picks
TRANSLATION: We're doing the same old things the same new way!
TRANSLATION: We're doing the same old things the same new way!
Well I guess I was wrong about the political bent of the P-Ulitzers; Howie Hairshirt hugged himself on A1. Bill Keller's "truth to power" gag suggests the beginning of a new era of brazen partisan reporting, and possibly the hacks can sustain it for a little while, as the sales and profits plummet.
P. S. NYT's near a six-year low; WPO's near a two-year low (though unfortunately way up from Watergate). MNI's at a four-year low.
P. S. NYT's near a six-year low; WPO's near a two-year low (though unfortunately way up from Watergate). MNI's at a four-year low.
Monday, April 17, 2006
Well, the News-Hack-Slap-on-the...P-Ulitzers were just awarded. The Times-Picayune earned two richly deserved ones, even if its merit was not so much for reporting as for surviving. (The Columbia board recognized its geographical bias by giving one to the Biloxi Sun-Herald too.) We cannot judge from the others; there does not seem to be TOO egregious a political slant to the rest (except maybe for Mike Luckovich). Thankfully, no movie or TV "critic" won. The arts winners, as usual, mean nothing.
(Via the inevitable Romy)
(Via the inevitable Romy)
YOO-hoo, anybody out there?
STOOPID: Years ago, during after the Pac-Man era, somebody tried making video games into TV game shows. They bombed. This won't work either. Dweebs must be interactive.
The @#$%&* "FATHER" of Pakistan gave the nutcases nuke technology.
How many fathers does the devil have?
How many fathers does the devil have?
A renowned political courtesan declares Dubya a two-term Jimmah.
Them's fightin' words!
At least Jimmah could grow peanuts.
Them's fightin' words!
At least Jimmah could grow peanuts.
The divided states of America If Roe v. Wade is overturned, rules on abortion may depend on where you live and who is governor
What's wrong with that? If some states want to be abortion mills, fine. If others don't, fine. At least let the people decide.
With any luck people will decide they don't want abortion mills.
What's wrong with that? If some states want to be abortion mills, fine. If others don't, fine. At least let the people decide.
With any luck people will decide they don't want abortion mills.
Meantime good things are happening for OUR candidates -- so says the Prowler of AmSpec:
The RNC intends to pump a bit more money and noise into the Bilbray campaign, in hopes that the special election vote in June will help turn public perception about just how overrated an issue so-called "public corruption" really is going into the upcoming election cycle.
Further complicating matters for Democrats is the federal investigation of Rep. Alan Mollohan (WV)...
Translation: Our corruption doesn't count -- but THEIRS DOES!
Speaking of Colin, Prowler says some of those whining generals are running Foggy Bottom for President. That would not be surprising. We shall see.
The RNC intends to pump a bit more money and noise into the Bilbray campaign, in hopes that the special election vote in June will help turn public perception about just how overrated an issue so-called "public corruption" really is going into the upcoming election cycle.
Further complicating matters for Democrats is the federal investigation of Rep. Alan Mollohan (WV)...
Translation: Our corruption doesn't count -- but THEIRS DOES!
Speaking of Colin, Prowler says some of those whining generals are running Foggy Bottom for President. That would not be surprising. We shall see.
Elsewhere in TRIBCO's LaLaLand, what this country needs is a good five-cent piece of -- political theater:
David Hare's "Stuff Happens," stirringly directed by Gordon Davidson last summer at the Mark Taper Forum, represents one of the more compelling theatrical forays into disastrous current events. The play, which was just updated for a new production at the New York Public Theater, corrals the Bush and Blair administrations into a penetrating dramatization of the lead-up to this latest Iraq invasion. And instead of skewing the material toward a predictable bias, Hare finds in Colin Powell a protagonist who can movingly embody the diplomatic tragedy that paves the road to any war. [Emphasis added.]
Sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Oh and by the way, just because you use the words "left-leaning" doesn't make your piece any less so.
(Via ArtsJournal.com)
David Hare's "Stuff Happens," stirringly directed by Gordon Davidson last summer at the Mark Taper Forum, represents one of the more compelling theatrical forays into disastrous current events. The play, which was just updated for a new production at the New York Public Theater, corrals the Bush and Blair administrations into a penetrating dramatization of the lead-up to this latest Iraq invasion. And instead of skewing the material toward a predictable bias, Hare finds in Colin Powell a protagonist who can movingly embody the diplomatic tragedy that paves the road to any war. [Emphasis added.]
Sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Oh and by the way, just because you use the words "left-leaning" doesn't make your piece any less so.
(Via ArtsJournal.com)
Sunday, April 16, 2006
We have reason for apprehension:
In Sunday's New York Times a former White House counterterrorism expert said Iran's response to any U.S. military attack would be to use "its terrorist network to strike American targets around the world."
"Iran has forces at its command far superior to anything al Qaeda was ever able to field"...
But then, a story like this ALWAYS has a punchline:
...wrote former White House counter terror chief RICHARD CLARKE....
Yes, we have reason for apprehension, but those urging restraint do not help their cause by citing RICHARD CLARKES.
In Sunday's New York Times a former White House counterterrorism expert said Iran's response to any U.S. military attack would be to use "its terrorist network to strike American targets around the world."
"Iran has forces at its command far superior to anything al Qaeda was ever able to field"...
But then, a story like this ALWAYS has a punchline:
...wrote former White House counter terror chief RICHARD CLARKE....
Yes, we have reason for apprehension, but those urging restraint do not help their cause by citing RICHARD CLARKES.
Apparently more than one eBay alumnus makes overrated movies that may not earn back their negative costs.
We wonder if Forbes.com would have mentioned this but that one of our "editors" works for YOU-KNOW-WHO.
We wonder further why the guy hasn't changed his name to David O. Selznick. He's halfway there.
We wonder if Forbes.com would have mentioned this but that one of our "editors" works for YOU-KNOW-WHO.
We wonder further why the guy hasn't changed his name to David O. Selznick. He's halfway there.
"There's only the same five songs on the radio and the same five artists on all the compilations."
That makes this fad different from the usual pop "music"?
That makes this fad different from the usual pop "music"?
Mr. My Business is My Business blows a fuse to end all fuses because the Republicans guaranteed they'll go down to defeat in November -- thanks to CAMPAIGN FINANCE REFORM!!!!!
Whenever Business runs his campaign-finance screeds he reminds us he works for two huge rich powerful media organizations. Seems to us, Business, if you want to counteract EEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL Democratic pressure groups the only thing you have to do is OPEN YOUR MOUTH -- and your MEGAPHONES will do the rest.
That's a luxury most of us DO NOT HAVE.
Whenever Business runs his campaign-finance screeds he reminds us he works for two huge rich powerful media organizations. Seems to us, Business, if you want to counteract EEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL Democratic pressure groups the only thing you have to do is OPEN YOUR MOUTH -- and your MEGAPHONES will do the rest.
That's a luxury most of us DO NOT HAVE.
We may need a new defense secretary, but when a CLINTONISTA suggests we need a new defense secretary, something automatically smells.
This is why we can never entirely trust Democrats on defense. The great unknowable question of 9/11 is how would President Gore have responded? With a police action? With Interpol? With U. N. resolutions? With arrest warrants? We'll never know, and it's just as well.
This is why we can never entirely trust Democrats on defense. The great unknowable question of 9/11 is how would President Gore have responded? With a police action? With Interpol? With U. N. resolutions? With arrest warrants? We'll never know, and it's just as well.
By the way, we couldn't help noticing the thumbnail of this cover that ran with the CW story on the senators. Of course HANK LUCE ran the rag in those days, and you can be sure whatever this was was a campaign piece for Ike and the Republicans. From right-wing knee-jerk reactionary to left-wing knee-jerk reactionary in two generations! We're proud of you, TWXSTERS!
Have the TWXSTERS kidnapped Mr. Mark? Are they holding him for ransom? It would seem that way judging from their latest newsrag: not only do we run a COVER MOVIE PLUG, we run a CW piece on America's best and worst senators -- and the best include NINE DEMOCRATS! Oh, four are REPUBLICANS? We didn't know. That's the nice thing about editing Mr. Mark style -- you'll never second-guess yourself even when the self-parody is obvious.